Have you seen all the amazing photos and footage coming back from space right now?
That Mars rover is quite the feat of engineering.
Who’d have thought a team could merge a chocolate bar with an old Vitesse!
And yet there it is, all by itself doing the loneliest job in the world. Sorry, I mean out of this world.
I reckon the rover and the robot from the sci-fi movie Short Circuit were separated at birth, or at the very least distantly related.
‘I reckon the rover and the robot from the sci-fi movie Short Circuit were separated at birth’ (Image: NASA/AFP via Getty Images)
I’m just in awe at how our boffins push science further every day. It feels like barely a week passes without a new project blasting off.
Soon there’ll be no room out there – astronauts will be lining up to park their spaceships. At the parking meteor, of course.
The big question is whether we will find signs of intelligent life up there.
When the Perseverance rover first sent back videos that featured a “tick tick tick” sound, watchers were spooked.
‘It’s great we can now get the weather forecast on Mars as I’m throwing a party in space’ (Image: NASA/JPL-CALTECH/AFP via Getty I)
Was this E.T., finally home? It’s actually the SuperCam’s laser, hitting rocks to tell scientists back home how hard they are and whether they are impervious to certain weather conditions.
It’s great we can now get the weather forecast on Mars as I’m throwing a party in space. Can you help me planet? If you feel all this talk about Mars has left our nearest intergalactic landing point in the dark, then there’s a good reason for this.
You can thank your favourite Sunday paper for eclipsing it.
The man in the moon was never going to be a match for the girl in the Star, right?
A prime cut’s on barbie
Due to current social distancing rules, this column is still only allowed one reader at a time. I’m glad it’s you!
I’m getting a haircut on Trim-dependence Day, April 12, because, as I said last week, I’m faced with my own “throwback” every time I look in the mirror.
The opening of the salons will hopefully coincide with some decent weather.
That’ll mean I can celebrate my haircut in style by grilling some chicken and burgers in the garden.
Technically I’ll be killing two birds with one stone by avoiding the long line outside my local barbers. I’m doing my own barber-queue.
Double take on Masked Singer
‘Mo Gilligan was convinced that Viking on The Masked Singer was me’
Did you know I was the first person ever to play the A-ha video for Take On Me when I interviewed them back in the day?
I was a VJ (video jockey I’ll have you know) on Sky Channel pre-MTV.
I last met up with Morten a couple of years back, top.
More recently, Mo Gilligan was convinced that Viking on The Masked Singer was me.
But it turned out to be Morten himself.
Mo seemed so convinced it was me in the costume, even I questioned whether I should have been at home eating a takeaway in my boxers as
I thought I might suddenly get the call to do an encore.
Stuck in Eighties
Life in 2021 keeps on reminding me I’m synonymous with Eighties culture.
The printer in the office packed up yesterday so I called up our IT guy.
I told him that it had a full ream of paper, yet I keep getting the same error message warning – I just can’t get enough, I just can’t get enough.
Darren the IT guy took a look remotely and said: “I see the problem, it’s your fault for being so Eighties.”
I said: “What’s it got to do with me?” He claimed the printer was obviously stuck in Depeche Mode.
Hats off at the head of queue
We went to Costco yesterday but almost didn’t bother when we saw the long line of customers outside waiting to get in.
They say British people like to join queues… well, we don’t, and I will be first in line to tell you that. But it’s one of the many changes to our lives we have all had to get used to.
My missus spotted there were health checks as people got closer to the doors.
She could see a guy holding one of those temperature scanners.
When it was our turn, Monica took her woolly hat off ready for a forehead check.
The guy with the scanner told her: “Membership card please.”
Bleep! Awkward!
I’m grappling with new job
A strange picture was sent to me on Twitter. It bemuses me somewhat.
All Elite Wrestling – a bit like WWE – are, for some odd reason, suggesting I’m one of their new signings.
There’s even a poster of me and my mullet to prove it.
I’m still just as slim, so I think I’d be pretty good at wrestling as I could slip between my opponents’ fingers.
But it all seems like a pointless spectacle to me – men not wearing trousers but fighting for a belt. Of course, there’s always Origami Wrestling… but that’s only available on paper view.
Source: Celebrities - dailystar.co.uk
