As Pete Wicks struts his stuff on the Strictly Come Dancing stage for the first time tonight, he’ll have his number one fan in the audience – his mum Tracy.
Their bond is particularly poignant as Pete, at the tender age of 12, saved his mum’s life. The ex-Towie hunk has bravely shared the harrowing tale of how he discovered his mum in a dire state in their kitchen following her suicide attempt. In his raw and revealing memoir, Pete recounts the chilling moment he had to call his grandmother Doreen for help, dial for an ambulance, and desperately try to stop the bleeding to keep his mother alive.
Recounting that fateful night, the 36 year old celeb said: “I saw her sitting at the table, which had been covered in blood. I saw the blood dripping first. She was holding a knife in her other hand. Immediately, I ran over to her to take the knife from her hand. Before that, she had seemed almost possessed it was like my mum had gone and someone (or something) else had taken over her body.
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“But when I came over to her, it’s like she woke up. She looked up at me with eyes full of tears. ‘I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry,’ she kept repeating. I told her it was okay as I panicked trying to work out what to do. I called Nan. I could barely get the words out to describe what had happened. I think I basically just said, ‘Mum… knife… blood.'”
(Image: Getty Images for Condé Nast)
Nan Doreen instructed Pete to hang up and dial 999. Pete continued: “I followed her instructions, called the ambulance, and then started caring for Mum, who was sitting on the floor bleeding heavily by that point. I used towels to try and stop the bleeding. I poured the wine down the sink. It’s difficult to pinpoint my feelings at that moment, as I think it was pure shock. I didn’t cry I just went into crisis mode.”, reports the Mirror.
In his book, Never Enough, Pete reveals that the aftermath of the trauma had a significant impact on his life, making him protective over Tracy. After separating from Pete’s father when he was 11, she raised him as a single mother with Doreen in Harlow, Essex.
However, he also blamed himself.
He admits: “I didn’t say it, but I believed it was my fault. I had been with mum before it happened. I had agreed to go upstairs. I had stayed upstairs even though I could hear her wailing. If it was anyone’s fault, it was mine. Looking back, I realise that my responsibility was probably overwhelming at that moment. I was the child, and I needed to be cared for. Instead, I had to care for my parent and suppress all the fear, panic, loneliness and self-blame that was beginning to grow inside me.”
Fortunately, Tracy recovered quickly and was soon discharged from the hospital. She apologised to her son, describing it as a “moment of madness” that would never recur.
Pete has spoken out about his emotional struggle, saying, “I think I was worried that, if we communicated in any more detail, all the feelings I was trying to suppress would spill out of me. One of those feelings was anger. I was angry at her for doing it. She kept telling me she loved me and she was sorry, but I thought: how could you love me, if you would’ve f**king left me? I thought I wasn’t enough for her to stay.”
(Image: PA)
After years of healing, they’ve managed heart-to-hearts. Pete shares, “It’s only in the last few years that I’ve processed a lot of what has happened and I’ve had some really open conversations with her. I have come to understand that she never wanted to leave me she wanted to leave herself. It wasn’t because she didn’t love me enough. It’s because the struggle and the pain was so real that she wasn’t able to think outside of that. I don’t blame my mum for any of it. I just wish I could take all that pain away.”
The celeb got his mum’s approval before publishing his book to highlight the battle with mental health scars. Pete reveals Tracy who cheered him on for Strictly – is buzzing with zeal to amp up her life.
He addeed: “You just have to hold on. My mum is living proof of that. Despite the fear I felt on that rainy, drunken night, I trust her more than I ever have.”
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Source: Celebrities - dailystar.co.uk
