Noah blamed inflation on “the pandemic, supply chain issues and a Russian man who clearly wasn’t hugged enough as a child.”
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High Level of Interest
The Fed raised interest rates by half a percentage point on Wednesday in an effort to curb inflation.
On Thursday’s “Daily Show,” Trevor Noah blamed inflation on “the pandemic, supply chain issues and a Russian man who clearly wasn’t hugged enough as a child.”
“And because of that, everything costs more: groceries, gas, blackmail. It’s terrible!” — TREVOR NOAH
“Think of the economy like a house party, all right? Yeah, you want it to be banging, you know what I mean? You want it to be banging, but you don’t want it to get out of control because then no one can get a drink, and everyone is punching and fighting over what is left — it’s chaos, basically, it’s chaos! So raising the interest rate is like trying to calm the party down. But if you’re too extreme and you call the cops or you turn on the light and everyone sees who they were dancing with, now the party ends. The whole thing shuts down, that’s the recession of a party. So what the Federal Reserve is trying to do is change the players just enough so people stay, but then also make sure that nobody is dancing on the table.” — TREVOR NOAH
“After yesterday’s rate hike, the markets went up 932 points. Pretty good. But this morning, as one reporter described it, ‘Investors woke up with a binge-trading hangover.’ Oh, you’ve got to be careful when you binge-trade; otherwise, you could wake up next to a stock you don’t even remember acquiring.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“Then today, everything went kablooey. The Dow tumbled over 1,000 points, in the worst day of the year so far, eclipsing the previous worst day of the year: every day of the year.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
The Punchiest Punchlines (Mexican St. Patrick’s Day Edition)
“Happy Cinco de Mayo. Yeah, it’s that one day when people are excited to hear someone say, ‘I’ve got Corona!’” — JIMMY FALLON
“What a day after two years of working from home — it was nice to have those vaguely problematic parties back in the office again.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Meanwhile, today President Biden hosted a Cinco de Mayo reception in the Rose Garden with the first lady of Mexico. Yeah, Biden talked about the warm relationship between the U.S. and Mexico. It’s better than Trump’s message on Cinco de Mayo, which was ‘Think outside the bun.’” — JIMMY FALLON
“Now, a lot of people mistakenly believe that today is Mexican Independence Day. It’s not — it’s Mexican St. Patrick’s Day. That’s why we drink green margaritas.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“Cinco de Mayo isn’t even celebrated in all of Mexico. And here in the U.S., it only began to take off in the 1970s and ’80s, when brewing companies began capitalizing on it as a way to appeal to consumers. Wow, promoting a holiday for corporations to make money? That is so — that is so crass. I can’t believe it. You know, breaks your heart. Well, at least we’ll always have the Feast of St. Oktoberfest.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
The Bits Worth Watching
Ahead of Mother’s Day this weekend, celebrities like Kristen Bell, Andy Cohen and Sandra Oh read texts from their moms on Thursday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”
Also, Check This Out
Alison Leiby had just performed her show “Oh God, a Show About Abortion” when she learned of the leaked draft opinion showing that the Supreme Court could be on the verge of overturning Roe v. Wade.
Source: Television - nytimes.com
