“The Republicans instead supported the ‘For Some of the People — We Can’t Say It Out Loud, but You Know Which Ones We Mean — Act,’” Stephen Colbert said of the voting rights bill.
Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Who’s the Fairest of Them All
Republicans blocked a far-reaching voting rights bill, known as the For the People Act, in the Senate on Tuesday.
“The Republicans instead supported the ‘For Some of the People — We Can’t Say It Out Loud, but You Know Which Ones We Mean — Act,’” Stephen Colbert said on Wednesday night.
“The Senate voted yesterday to block the For the People voting rights bill, but not until they got their voting paperwork in order. Let’s see, I got my license, passport, tax returns, high school yearbook. OK, I think I’m ready for my riddle.” — SETH MEYERS
“Senate Republicans haven’t been this happy since Kenny G started touring again.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Yep, Democrats wanted things like automatic voter registration and Election Day to be a national holiday, while Republicans wanted every polling place to be at a yacht club.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Republican Senator Mike Lee said in an interview yesterday with Fox News host Sean Hannity that the For the People voting rights act was, quote, ‘written in hell by the devil himself,’ which is also what it says on the poster for ‘F9.’” — SETH MEYERS
“Yes, the Senate’s founding purpose: to do nothing. It’s right there in Article I: ‘All legislative powers herein granted shall be vested in a Congress of the United States, which shall consist of a Senate, where one wizened, ancient turtle man, with no regard for anything but the self-preservation of his own power, shall, with his pockets stuffed with greasy bags full of money, strangle the hope of all who dare to dream of true democracy, and recognize April as National Jazz Month.’”— STEPHEN COLBERT, on Senator Mitch McConnell’s saying the Senate was fulfilling its “founding purpose”
The Punchiest Punchlines (Dad, You’re Embarrassing Me Edition)
“Speaking of the former president, his daughter and son-in-law don’t want to, because reports say that Ivanka and Jared Kushner have distanced themselves from the former president and his constant complaints. That complaint? [imitating Trump] ‘Why does he get to date my daughter? Doesn’t seem fair. We’re both family.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“Trump has become so distant from Ivanka that he started to call her ‘Eric.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“When he heard that one of his kids wanted distance, Trump was like, ‘Please be Eric, please be Eric!’” — JIMMY FALLON
“Apparently the feeling is somewhat mutual, because insiders say there is jealousy from the former president about Kushner’s ‘seven-figure book deal.’ Early reports are that Jared’s book is going to be a lot like Jared: glossy and no spine.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
The Bits Worth Watching
On Wednesday’s “Late Show,” the actress Christine Baranski joined Colbert in singing “Side by Side by Side” from Stephen Sondheim’s “Company.”
What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night
Jack Black will be the final guest on Conan O’Brien’s TBS talk show.
Also, Check This Out
From Ed McMahon to Andy Richter, late-night shows have a long history of sidekicks.
Source: Television - nytimes.com
