President Biden “sent an elite team of ultraliberal F.B.I. agents to assassinate Donald Trump, but somehow he slipped out the back door,” Kimmel joked on Wednesday.
Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Losing the Plot
Newly unsealed files from the F.B.I. search of Mar-a-Lago in 2022 showed that agents were authorized to use deadly force if necessary.
“Which is standard operating procedure, whenever the F.B.I. execute a search warrant,” Jimmy Kimmel noted on Wednesday, “but in the MAGA-verse, it is a plot to kill Donald Trump.”
Conservatives reacted with outrage to what some have called an assassination attempt, with Trump writing in a campaign email, “Joe Biden was locked and loaded ready to take me out and put my family in danger.”
“I always thought of Biden as a doddering old man, but Donald Trump makes him look like one of The Expendables.” — MICHAEL KOSTA
“‘Locked and loaded’? ‘Ready to take me out’? I’ve never heard Joe Biden sound so [expletive] cool in my life.” — MICHAEL KOSTA
“The diabolical mastermind Joe Biden sent an elite team of ultraliberal F.B.I. agents to assassinate Donald Trump, but somehow he slipped out the back door. Somehow, they missed the fact that the loudest and most famous man in America and all 15 of his Secret Service agents were in New Jersey at the time that they raided Mar-a-Lago.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Punchiest Punchlines (Trump’s Bedroom Edition)
“Well, speaking of the former president, according to a new report, Trump’s attorneys found classified documents in his bedroom four months after the F.B.I. searched Mar-a-Lago. The lawyers knew Trump was hiding something when they saw a box labeled ‘books.’” — JIMMY FALLON
“Oh, my God, the only thing more shocking to find in Donald Trump’s bedroom would be a current wife.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“Now, to be fair, Trump rarely goes into his bedroom. As we’ve recently learned, he does most of his sleeping in court.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
The Bits Worth Watching
Jay Pharoah performed diss raps in the style of Shaquille O’Neal, 50 Cent, Katt Williams and more on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show.”
What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night
The musician and “The Voice” star John Legend will appear on Thursday’s “Daily Show.”
Also, Check This Out
The actor Peter Gallagher discussed his four-decades-long marriage to Paula Harwood on this week’s Modern Love Podcast.
Source: Television - nytimes.com
