After Kamala Harris accepted the nomination, Stewart mused: “How funny would it have been if at the end she was like, ‘But seriously, though: not for me.’”
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Kamala FTW
Vice President Kamala Harris accepted her party’s presidential nomination on Day 4 of the Democratic National Convention on Thursday.
Jon Stewart called it “Kamala’s Night” on “The Daily Show,” saying, “How funny would it have been if at the end she was like, ‘But seriously, though: not for me. This has all been great, but I’ve been thinking it over.’”
“Kamala Harris’s speech was everything we’ve been waiting for all week. She hit her opponent on his policy failures. She hit him on his dereliction of duty. She hit him on his lies, his treason and his crimes and his crimes and his crimes. She is a prosecutor in the trial of Donald J. Trump. He is guilty as charged and now it is time to sentence him to four to eight years of President Harris.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“But credit where credit is due: the Democrats, on short notice, exploited their newfound momentum and enthusiasm with a display of the breadth and width of this diverse, often contradictory party of Roosevelt. At their convention, they had union leaders and C.E.O.s. They had Democratic Party icons and lifelong Republicans. They had a guy yelling, ‘Screw the billionaires!’ followed immediately by a very happy billionaire. [imitating a Democrat:] ‘It’s all OK if it’s our billionaire. I don’t like billionaires, but he’s all right.’” — JON STEWART, referring to Bernie Sanders and Gov. JB Pritzker
“Listen to me: Whatever you’re feeling, go with it. Whether that feeling is joy or perhaps relief at having a chance when you had none is exhilarating.” — JON STEWART
The Punchiest Punchlines (What a Difference a Month Can Make Edition)
“A lot can change in a month. Right now, Kamala’s campaign headquarters are buzzing, while Biden’s have been turned into a Spirit Halloween.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Meanwhile, last night, Tim Walz officially accepted the nomination to be vice president. Now, a month ago, nobody knew Tim Walz, and now he’s famous. Even the Hawk Tuah Girl was like, ‘Damn, that was quick.’” — JIMMY FALLON
“In his speech last night at the Democratic National Convention, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz told the crowd, ‘Never underestimate a public-school teacher.’ He’s right. My mother is a public-school teacher, and she can drink way more than you’d think.” — SETH MEYERS
“In one month, they have raised around $500 million. Congratulations, Democrats, you can stop texting now.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
The Bits Worth Watching
Pop star Sabrina Carpenter performed her hit “Please Please Please” on Thursday’s “Tonight Show.”
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Source: Television - nytimes.com
