Jimmy Kimmel Live (TV Program)

Subterms

    Latest story

    88 Shares71 Views

    Late Night Celebrates the First American Pope

    by

    “We have an American pope and a Russian president,” Jimmy Kimmel said, calling it “an historic era.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘New Pope, Who Dis?’Cardinal Robert Francis Prevost was elected pope on Thursday, becoming the first American pope.“We have an American pope and a Russian president,” Jimmy Kimmel said. “Isn’t it incredible?”“We have the first American pope. And let me just say, as an American, are you sure about this? We don’t really have the gravitas that you associate with pope-iness. We’re less ‘somber procession’ and more ‘monster truck rally.’” — DESI LYDIC“I just think it’s just a little bit weird that the holiest man in the world probably knows all the words to the Chili’s ‘Baby Back Ribs’ song.” — DESI LYDIC“The Pope Mobile is now a Ford F-250 with truck nuts.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“You can tell he’s American ’cause he stepped out on the Vatican balcony and said, ‘New pope, who dis?’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Another Leo Edition)“They make him pick a name. He chose Leo XIV, which is a shame because there have been 13 other Leos. We’ve never had even one Pope Bob, which would have been pretty great.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“How have there been so many popes named Leo? Leo doesn’t even sound like a Pope name. Sounds more like the altar boy who got high and ate all the communion wafers.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yep, he may be the new pope, but to his friends back in Chicago, he’ll always be ‘Bobby Bratwurst.’” — JIMMY FALLON“From now on, the pope is going to sound like this. [imitating Chicago accent] Hey, dere, it’s yer buddy Leo, the deep dish papa. Just talked to God, and not even he can help da White Sox. Sorry. First order of business, I will be canonizing Michael Jordan. Now let’s end by saying daaa prayers.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingThe Colombian superstar Shakira played “Box of Lies” with Jimmy Fallon on Thursday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutLovie Simone in “Forever,” a new adaptation of the Judy Blume novel created by Mara Brock Akil for Netflix.Elizabeth Morris/NetflixAn all-Black cast stars in the new Netflix series “Forever,” adapted from Judy Blume’s 1970 novel of the same name. More

    More stories

    • 125 Shares92 Views

      in Television

      Late Night Anxiously Awaits the Unveiling of Trump’s Big News

      by

      “The Daily Show” host Desi Lydic said it “could be anything from ‘I’ve achieved peace in the Middle East’ to ‘I just tried bucatini, and I’m never going back to regular spaghetti.’”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Trump, the TeasePresident Donald Trump said Tuesday that he would make a big announcement in the next few days, keeping the details elusive.On Wednesday’s “Daily Show,” Desi Lydic said, “it’s great to have a president who does teaser trailers for world events.”“It’s like when F.D.R. said, ‘We only have one thing to fear, and I’ll tell you what it is after the break!’” — DESI LYDIC“This is Donald Trump, so his big announcement could be anything from ‘I’ve achieved peace in the Middle East’ to ‘I just tried bucatini, and I’m never going back to regular spaghetti.’” — DESI LYDIC“This could literally be about anything. He could be getting rid of the tariffs or installing a Big Mac button on the White House desk.” — JIMMY FALLON“Maybe Melania’s pregnant again. Wouldn’t that be sweet, to have a baby — another baby in the White House?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“This had better not be another set of his Trump NFTs or a golf tournament that he won. This feels like a dad who’s a gambling addict telling his family, ‘I have big news, we’re moving into an RV!’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“But this is what happens when you put a loose cannon into the White House. This — it could be about anything from new tariffs to announcing our next attorney general is Gary Busey. Best-case scenario, Don Jr.’s rabies test comes back negative.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Pope O’Clock Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

    • 125 Shares98 Views

      in Television

      Late Night on Trump, the Constitution and Playing With Dolls

      by

      On “Meet the Press” and social media, President Trump gave the hosts a lot of material to choose from, even by his standards.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Presidents Say the Darndest ThingsDuring a “Meet the Press” interview that aired on Sunday, President Trump was asked whether he had to uphold the Constitution. He replied, “I don’t know.”“Wow, they talked a lot about Biden’s mental decline, but this guy can’t even remember stuff from, like, four months ago,” Seth Meyers said on Monday.“Well, it’s been great, folks, but that’s it — I think we can roll credits on the United States.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“On ‘Millionaire,’ that’d be the warm-up question, like ‘What color is an orange?’ or ‘Name a planet with people on it.’ I mean, if you can’t answer that the president’s supposed to uphold the Constitution, I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t even let you become a citizen.” — JON STEWART“It’s the same answer he gives when they ask where Melania lives: ‘I don’t know, I’d have to ask my lawyers.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The Constitution isn’t one of Don Jr.’s birthdays. You can’t just ignore it.” — JIMMY KIMMELTrump, asked about the economy, also doubled down on his suggestion that children could get by with fewer toys. “I don’t think a beautiful baby girl needs — that’s 11 years old needs to have 30 dolls,” he said. “I think they can have three dolls, or four dolls.”“Right, think of them like wives: Two, three, four would be a good number.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“All you need to know about the relationship he has with his daughters and granddaughters is he thinks 11-year-olds still play with dolls.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Johnson. It’s a beautiful 11-year-old baby! You did so well in your 44th trimester.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“In response, Pokémon has rolled out their new slogan: ‘Pokémon, Gotta Catch a Couple!’” — SETH MEYERS“I mean, who runs on a pledge of ‘Let’s make Christmas worse for children’?” — BILL MAHER“A billionaire telling kids they need to cut back on dolls. That is some world-class political messaging right there.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Every interview now is like an episode of ‘Kids Say the Darndest Things.’” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (May the Fourth Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

    • 113 Shares69 Views

      in Television

      Late Night Watches ‘Signalgate’ Claim a Victim, Sort of

      by

      Mike Waltz, who added a journalist to a Signal group chat about plans to bomb Yemen, is out as national security adviser, but his career isn’t over.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Not the Last WaltzOn Thursday, Mike Waltz — famous for inadvertently adding a journalist to a Signal chat group where officials discussed plans to attack Yemen — was removed from his post as President Trump’s national security adviser. But Trump soon announced that he would nominate Waltz to be the ambassador to the United Nations.“The news was first reported when he accidentally texted it to Lester Holt,” Seth Meyers said on “Late Night.”“So finally — finally — a member of the Trump administration faces lasting consequences that lasted three and a half hours.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“What a strong message that is: ‘We can’t trust you to keep our secrets. But go cavort freely with representatives from every country in the world.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Well, he’s not fired, but he was removed from the group chat.” — JIMMY FALLON“It was a tough decision, and as with anything this sensitive, the first person to find out was Atlantic editor Jeffrey Goldberg.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“So, that guy, the one who claimed strangers’ numbers can get sucked into your phone, will now be Trump’s ambassador to the United Nations if he gets confirmed, which means he’ll spend a lot less time at the White House, where his portfolio seemed to consist of two things: leaking war plans on group chats and, much like his phone, sucking up to Donald Trump.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Return to Office Edition)“Apparently, Elon Musk is stepping away from his work at the White House so he can focus on running Tesla. He was like, ‘Hm, what’s better: this dumpster fire or this dumpster fire?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Elon is dialing back his DOGE duties to focus on his own disaster of a company.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingQuinta Brunson, the creator and star of “Abbott Elementary,” crashed Thursday’s “Tonight Show” to promote her gig hosting “Saturday Night Live” this weekend.Also, Check This OutGeorge Clooney in “Good Night, and Good Luck.” He was among the screen stars who got Tony nominations for their work on Broadway this season.Sara Krulwich/The New York TimesAudra McDonald, George Clooney, and Sarah Snook, stars of both stage and screen, received Tony nominations on Thursday. More

    • 88 Shares80 Views

      in Television

      Seth Meyers Recaps Trump’s Latest Revisionist History

      by

      Meyers said the president’s ABC News interview “changed his mind” about Trump’s first 100 days in office.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Revisionist Recent HistoryPresident Donald Trump sat down for an interview with the ABC News reporter Terry Moran to discuss his first 100 days in office.“And you know what? He changed my mind,” Seth Meyers said on Wednesday.“Before the interview, I thought the first 100 days had been really bad, but after the interview, I thought, ‘Oh, I see the plan, the next 100 days are going to make the first 100 days look amazing.’” — SETH MEYERS“Trump claimed that egg prices are down, gasoline is down, and groceries are down. Then a staffer said, ‘Sir, those charts are your approval rating.’” — JIMMY FALLON“[Imitating Trump] I mean, what kind of an interview is this? I thought you were going to ask me if 100 men could beat a gorilla, not about the tariffs. I don’t know about the tariffs.” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump said that the Declaration of Independence meant unity. Unity is the opposite of independence. How did Trump find the one time that ‘unity and love’ is the wrong answer?” — DESI LYDIC“What makes this even more sad is that the Declaration of Independence is basically the colonies filing for divorce. It’s the one thing Trump should absolutely recognize. And all of that was supposed to be the softball part of the interview.” — DESI LYDICThe Punchiest Punchlines (Shrinkage Edition)“Meanwhile, it just came out today that for the first three months of this year, the U.S. economy shrank. Trump was, like, ‘Well, it was the three coldest months — of course it was shrinkage.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yes, the U.S. economy is undergoing what economists refer to as a ‘George Costanza.’” — DESI LYDIC“Now, obviously, the economy is a complex interaction of multiple markets, so it’s difficult to point to any one factor, but it’s all Trump.” — DESI LYDIC“A hundred days in, we’re already going to loan sharks for Lunchables with this guy.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“All the experts say the economy is in pretty rough shape. However, Trump’s doctor says it’s the healthiest economy he’s ever seen.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingSpoofing Bill Belichick’s recent CBS interview, Richard Kind introduced his new girlfriend on Wednesday’s “Everybody’s Live with John Mulaney.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightPenn Badgley, the star of the Netflix series “You,” will appear on Thursday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutPhoto Illustration by The New York Times; Background: Brian Rea; Inset: Dana Scruggs for The New York TimesOn this week’s Modern Love, Miranda July discussed her plot to get older women talking about desire with her novel, “All Fours.” More

    • 113 Shares99 Views

      in Television

      Late Night Grades Trump’s First 100 Days in Office

      by

      “It’s been an historic 100 days — some would say prehistoric,” said Jimmy Kimmel.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.100 Down, Roughly 1,300 to GoPresident Trump’s 100th day in office was the talk of late night on Tuesday.On “Jimmy Kimmel Live,” the host said (perhaps not sincerely) that he’d had “a day of revelry and jubilation.”“We have 100 days behind us and only 13 more hundred days to go. It’s been an historic 100 days — some would say prehistoric.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Today was President Trump’s 100th day in office. Well, 100th day as president, fourth day in office.” — SETH MEYERS“Yes, it has been 100 days of Trump in the Oval Office. I mean that figuratively. Obviously, he spent lots of those days in the steam room at Mar-a-Lago.” — JORDAN KLEPPER“It is difficult to give Trump’s first 100 days a grade, but if I had to, I’d say it falls somewhere between ‘F’ and ‘U.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Let’s be honest: It’s been a bumpy ride. I mean, who knew renaming the Gulf of Mexico might actually be his high point?” — JIMMY FALLON“To mark 100 days in office, Trump kicked off a multiday media blitz that the White House is framing as a victory lap. Yep, and now all he needs is a victory.” — JIMMY FALLON“And the whole 100 days thing started back in 1933, right, when F.D.R.’s extraordinary productivity set a first-100-days standard against which all future presidents would be measured. And I think it’s appropriate to compare him to F.D.R., because Trump is well on his way to bringing back polio.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Mark Carney Edition)“With Carney’s victory, Canadians rejected his younger, much Trumpier opponent, Pierre Poilievre, which must be a relief for Trump, ’cause now he never has to try to say that guy’s name.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Don’t mess with Canada. They may be polite. You tick them off, they’re like John Wick after they killed his dog.” — JIMMY KIMMEL”You take that, Trump. That’s what happens when you mess with a country whose national pastime is ‘bar fight on ice.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“But, yes, thanks to Trump, the Liberal Party just pulled off a historic comeback, winning all the major Canadian demographics: hockey moms, hockey dads, hockey non-binaries, hockey seniors, hockey hockey players, and, of course, hot Ryans.” — JORDAN KLEPPERThe Bits Worth WatchingWill Ferrell and Stephen Colbert “Rickrolled” viewers during Tuesday’s “Late Show.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightJohn Cale and Maggie Rogers will perform together on “Everybody’s Live With Mulaney.”Also, Check This OutNearly three hours long, the concert was a characteristic Beyoncé epic.The New York TimesBeyoncé’s Cowboy Carter Tour, kicking off on Monday night in Inglewood, Calif., transformed the star’s personal and musical reclamation into a joyful extravaganza. More

    • 113 Shares119 Views

      in Television

      Late Night Pokes Fun at Trump’s Dismal Poll Numbers

      by

      Seth Meyers called Donald Trump “the most unpopular president since Kevin Spacey.” Even measles is polling better, according to Jimmy Fallon.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Down BadPresident Trump will mark 100 days in office this week, but most of the country won’t be celebrating, to judge from his falling poll numbers.On Monday, Seth Meyers said Trump was “killing it — and by ‘it,’ I mean his approval ratings.”“Donald Trump is the most unpopular president since Kevin Spacey.” — SETH MEYERS“After almost 100 days in office, Trump is as popular as Kanye at a bat mitzvah.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Time really flies when you’re in the fetal position, doesn’t it? — BILL MAHER“In the ABC poll, more than 70 percent of Americans say the economy today is either ‘not so good’ or ‘poor.’ The other 30 percent are either in a coma or in his cabinet or both.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Yep, Trump’s approval rating is down to 39 percent. Even measles is polling at 40 percent.” — JIMMY FALLON“In a post on Truth Social yesterday, President Trump urged House Republicans to skip a celebration of his first 100 days in office to vote on his tax bill. Oh, I hate to break it to you, buddy — there wasn’t going to be a celebration.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Cedric the Entertainer Edition)“For whatever reason, even though the Vatican dress code specifically recommended a dark suit for the service, Trump showed up in his bluest blue suit, something from the Cedric the Entertainer funeral collection.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trump wore his blue suit, and Melania wore her wedding dress.” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump thought it was a funeral for his holiness, Papa Smurf.” — JIMMY FALLON“Meanwhile, Trump wore a black suit for a week after Hooters went out of business.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Oh, Mary!” star Cole Escola showed Stephen Colbert how to play a straight guy on Monday’s “Late Show.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightJulia Louis-Dreyfus will appear on “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This Out“This is where I belong, these are my people,” Sister Monica Clare said. “I never thought I would find that.”Lila Barth for The New York TimesSister Monica Clare presents a compelling argument for convents in her popular TikTok content and a new memoir. More

    • 100 Shares161 Views

      in Television

      Kimmel Mocks Pete Hegseth’s Rumored Pentagon Makeup Studio

      by

      “Nothing sparks fear in the hearts of our enemies like a defense secretary who puts foundation on his face,” Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.All Dolled UpPete Hegseth denied reports this week that he requested a makeup studio built at the Pentagon to prepare for television interviews.On Thursday, Jimmy Kimmel said Americans wouldn’t even recognize the former secretary of defense, as opposed to Hegseth, who “is on TV now more than Ryan Seacrest.”“This is Lloyd Austin, he is a four-star general. He was the previous secretary of defense. You ever seen him before? No. You know why? He was inside the Pentagon doing his job — he was not on TV.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“He has strongly denied this. He called it a ‘totally fake story,’ and a Defense Department official added that — he said it makes no sense because Pete does his own makeup, which is more embarrassing.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I don’t know why he would be ashamed of this. A lot of warriors wear makeup. You ever see Mel Gibson in ‘Braveheart’? He’s got it all over.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Nothing sparks fear in the hearts of our enemies like a defense secretary who puts foundation on his face and a big palm full of Suavecito Pomade in his hair every day. It’s the warrior ethos.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The defense secretary has a makeup room, the vice president wears eyeliner, and yet somehow this administration spends all day, every day complaining about trans women ruining sports.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Take Your Kid to Work Day Edition)“So today was Take Your Kids to Work Day, which I admit I misunderstood — I didn’t know it had to be my kid.” — GREG GUTFELD“It is a day that got started in 1992 as a way for children to learn why their parents are so depressed all the time.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“It used to be Take Your Daughter to Work Day — remember that? — and it encouraged women in the workplace. Then over time it changed to Take Your Son or Daughter to Work. The rule is you have to pay your son 22 percent more than the daughter.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“At the White House this morning, Elon Musk brought a few of his kids to work — not all of them. He brought him to meet President Trump. See, that’s what happens when you get them wet — they multiply.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingThe singer Jelly Roll discussed his 200-pound weight loss on Thursday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutA young Cheech Marin and Tommy Chong, as seen in “Cheech and Chong’s Last Movie.”Ed Caraeff/Keep Smokin’David Bushell’s new documentary, “Cheech and Chong’s Last Movie,” celebrates its stars’ enduring friendship, on-screen and off. More

    • 138 Shares137 Views

      in Television

      Jimmy Kimmel Skewers Elon Musk’s Plan to ‘Get Out of DOGE’

      by

      “Musk says that he will dial back his work with the government so that he can spend more time with all 10 of his families,” Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Getting out of DOGEOn Tuesday, Elon Musk said he would soon spend less time in Washington and focus on running Tesla.Jimmy Kimmel called Musk “Mr. Congeniality” on Wednesday, saying the mogul “wants to get out of DOGE.”“Musk says he will dial back his work with the government so that he can spend more time with all 10 of his families.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“People forget, Elon — he can’t spend all his time in Washington. He has a company to run into the ground.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“In the first three months of this year, Tesla’s profits have fallen 71 percent. Which I guess is what happens when your CEO turns into white Kanye before your eyes.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I’m really not sure going back to Tesla is going to help anything at all. The reason Tesla is tanking is because people hate him and they don’t want to buy his stuff. Him being back is not going to make it better.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Pope Jokes Edition)“Even though they have their differences, Donald Trump said he will attend the funeral of Pope Francis. And, out of respect, he will delay slapping tariffs on communion wafers.” — GREG GUTFELD“President Trump plans on eulogizing the pope by saying, ‘He was a great pope except for the times he was a sucker and a loser.’” — GREG GUTFELDThe Bits Worth WatchingThe actress Ayo Edebiri read her Letterboxd review of “Everybody’s Live with John Mulaney” during the show on Wednesday.What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightJelly Roll will join Brandon Lake for a performance of “Hard Fought Hallelujah” on Thursday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutMaggie & Terre Roche, sisters from Park Ridge, N.J., released their album “Seductive Reasoning” 50 years ago this month.Columbia RecordsTurning 50 this month, Maggie & Terre Roche’s little-known 1975 album “Seductive Reasoning” is a forgotten revelation. More