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    Colbert Thinks the Nickname ‘Lady Giuliani’ Suits Jeanine Pirro

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    Colbert said President Trump’s latest appointment from the Fox News roster “drank a whole bottle of champagne, and then someone told her the news.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Lady Giuliani’Last Thursday, President Trump said he had chosen the Fox News personality Jeanine Pirro as the interim U.S. attorney for Washington, D.C.Stephen Colbert told his viewers on Monday that they might recognize Pirro from “Judge Jeanine,” where she “promoted voter-fraud claims, compared Jan. 6 rioters to Revolutionary War soldiers, and got pulled briefly from the network after making Islamophobic comments.”“She was later reinstated after Fox realized they didn’t care.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“And I’m sure she’s excited. I heard on Friday night, she drank a whole bottle of champagne, and then someone told her the news.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“President Trump last week named Fox News host Jeanine Pirro as the interim U.S. attorney for Washington, D.C. Well, she is always up for a case.” — SETH MEYERS“Pirro has also come under fire for pleading guilty for speeding after driving 119 miles per hour in a 65 zone and was forced to deny accusations of being drunk on air. It’s not great when Washington’s top attorney can best be described as ‘Lady Giuliani.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Trump announced the news on Truth Social, saying, ‘Pirro is considered one of the top district attorneys in the history of the state of New York. She is in a class by herself.’ That class? Court-mandated traffic school.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Pirro is the 23rd current or former Fox News employee hired by the Trump White House. If you work at Fox News right now and you haven’t been offered a job by this administration, you must be thinking, ‘Does he, like, hate me?’” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Thieving on a Jet Plane Edition)“The White House said that the royal family of Qatar is giving President Trump a $400 million luxury jet that he will use as Air Force One, and then keep once he leaves office. Everyone’s rightfully focused on the plane, but to me the big headline is that he’ll eventually leave office.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, the 89-passenger luxury plane has wood finishes, custom carpets and gold walls. The only thing it doesn’t have is a way to safely land at Newark airport.” — JIMMY FALLONWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Late Night on Trump, the Constitution and Playing With Dolls

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      On “Meet the Press” and social media, President Trump gave the hosts a lot of material to choose from, even by his standards.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Presidents Say the Darndest ThingsDuring a “Meet the Press” interview that aired on Sunday, President Trump was asked whether he had to uphold the Constitution. He replied, “I don’t know.”“Wow, they talked a lot about Biden’s mental decline, but this guy can’t even remember stuff from, like, four months ago,” Seth Meyers said on Monday.“Well, it’s been great, folks, but that’s it — I think we can roll credits on the United States.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“On ‘Millionaire,’ that’d be the warm-up question, like ‘What color is an orange?’ or ‘Name a planet with people on it.’ I mean, if you can’t answer that the president’s supposed to uphold the Constitution, I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t even let you become a citizen.” — JON STEWART“It’s the same answer he gives when they ask where Melania lives: ‘I don’t know, I’d have to ask my lawyers.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The Constitution isn’t one of Don Jr.’s birthdays. You can’t just ignore it.” — JIMMY KIMMELTrump, asked about the economy, also doubled down on his suggestion that children could get by with fewer toys. “I don’t think a beautiful baby girl needs — that’s 11 years old needs to have 30 dolls,” he said. “I think they can have three dolls, or four dolls.”“Right, think of them like wives: Two, three, four would be a good number.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“All you need to know about the relationship he has with his daughters and granddaughters is he thinks 11-year-olds still play with dolls.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Johnson. It’s a beautiful 11-year-old baby! You did so well in your 44th trimester.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“In response, Pokémon has rolled out their new slogan: ‘Pokémon, Gotta Catch a Couple!’” — SETH MEYERS“I mean, who runs on a pledge of ‘Let’s make Christmas worse for children’?” — BILL MAHER“A billionaire telling kids they need to cut back on dolls. That is some world-class political messaging right there.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Every interview now is like an episode of ‘Kids Say the Darndest Things.’” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (May the Fourth Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Late Night Weighs In on Trump’s Perfect Physical

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      “The doctor said Trump’s BMI is 28,” Jimmy Kimmel said. “Right, and so is his next wife, by the way.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.The Picture of HealthThe results of President Trump’s annual physical exam described a man in “excellent health.”“Of course he is,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Monday. “He eats right, he avoids unhealthy foods, diet soda. He manages stress, he doesn’t hang onto anger, he gets a good night’s sleep, he limits his time on social media, he spends lots of time with loved ones, and gets plenty of exercise getting in and out of that golf cart.”“And he’s got a body like Brad Pitt to show it.” — JIMMY KIMMELHe “gave Trump a clean bill of health, saying, ‘his active lifestyle continues to contribute significantly to his well-being’ including his ‘frequent victories in golf events,’ adding, his well-being is also due to a cruel, indifferent universe where good, hardworking people are routinely diagnosed with terminal illnesses, but an objectively evil monster who only eats cheeseburgers and fried chicken lives forever. The world is chaos, there is no god, proven by his frequent victories in golf events.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Dr. Barbabella claims that Trump is 6-feet-3, which he is not. He weighs 224 pounds. Just for comparison, Green Bay Packers quarterback Jordan Love is 6-4, 219 pounds. Honestly, it’s difficult to tell them apart.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I’m going to say no to either of those numbers. I don’t want to be that guy, but he has a front butt.” — JON STEWART“Maybe they just weighed Trump’s head.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The doctor said Trump’s BMI is 28. Right, and so is his next wife, by the way.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Barbabella, good man and thorough, wrote: ‘I performed and supervised the comprehensive exam, which included diagnostic and laboratory testing, as well as consultations with 14 specialty consultants.’ ’Cause nothing says good health like your doctor saying, ‘I think you’re fine. I just need to consult with 14 specialty consultants.’” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Taking Space Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Jon Stewart Can’t Stomach Trump’s Stock Market ‘Medicine’

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      The “Daily Show” host said America’s economy was “in the midst of a beautiful metamorphosis, turning from a simple caterpillar into a dead caterpillar.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Bad MedicineStock markets have been hammered by President Trump’s sweeping tariffs, which he insists will eventually revitalize the American economy.Jon Stewart had a different take on Monday’s “Daily Show.” He said the economy was “in the midst of a beautiful metamorphosis, turning from a simple caterpillar into a dead caterpillar.”“[imitating Trump] Hey, Mom, look — no economy!” — JON STEWART“President Trump likened the U.S. to a sick patient and his trade policies to an operation in a Truth Social post last week and said, ‘THE OPERATION IS OVER! THE PATIENT LIVED AND IS HEALING.’ Sounds great, until you remember that the surgeon didn’t go to medical school.” — SETH MEYERS“You’re all acting like the tariff regime is a tried-and-true remedy: ‘Oh, of course, this is the medicine that’s always prescribed!’ Except the last time it was tried, 100 years ago, we had a Great Depression.” — JON STEWART“And tonight we’re gonna party like it’s 1929.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yeah, guys, everyone is still talking about President Trump’s new tariffs and how they’re impacting the economy. Trump defended them by saying, ‘Sometimes you have to take medicine to fix something.’ RFK Jr. heard and was, like, ‘Then why did you hire me?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, Trump thinks that he’s a medicine expert because he’s the same color as DayQuil.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Hole in None Edition)“After the White House reported that President Trump won the senior club championship at his Florida golf club, the Washington Post reported that he tied for first with another player. But in the end, the Supreme Court gave it to Trump.” — SETH MEYERS“It’s good to see him relaxing. Killing the economy can be stressful.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Of course he won. Anyone who beats him gets deported to El Salvador.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“[imitating Trump] What’s my handicap? I’d say a complete inability to empathize with my fellow human beings. That’s a big one.” — SETH MEYERS“Also, buddy, you won the senior club championship at a resort with your name on it. That’s like my kids bragging that they beat me in Uno. They win Uno for one reason only: I want the [expletive] Uno game to be over, and I’m sure people who golf with Trump feel the same way.” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth WatchingOn Monday’s “Late Show,” Stephen Colbert talked with Senator Cory Booker about his recent 25-hour speech on the Senate floor.What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightThe “White Lotus” star Walton Goggins has some explaining to do on Tuesday’s “Late Night with Seth Meyers.”Also, Check This OutJasmine Amy Rogers brings charm to the title role, but “Boop! The Musical” leaves you wondering why it exists.Sara Krulwich/The New York TimesBetty Boop, the flapper of early talkie cartoons, now has her own subpar merch grab of a Broadway show, “Boop! The Musical.” More

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      Jon Stewart: Trump Is ‘Trying to Order Off-Menu From the Constitution’

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      President Trump says there are “methods” by which he could get a third term. “I think you tried one a few years ago,” the “Daily Show” host quipped. Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Animal StyleIn an interview on Sunday, President Trump said he was considering his options for pursuing a third term in office, even though the Constitution forbids it. (He said there were “methods” by which it could be done.)“I’m sorry — ‘considering the option?’” Jon Stewart said on Monday’s “Daily Show.”“What, are you trying to order off-menu from the Constitution? ‘Oh, yeah, I see you got, uh, what do you got, two terms here — but can I get it animal style?’” — JON STEWART“Yes, there are other methods. I think you tried one a few years ago.” — JON STEWART“Although maybe Trump has something more creative in mind with the Vance thing. Have you guys heard of the movie ‘Face/Off?’” — JON STEWART“So aside from the president saying, ‘I’m not leaving,’ is there any other image of the shambolic state of our democracy? Perhaps something that looks like what you might get if you fed ‘the destruction of democracy’ into an A.I. meme generator? Oh, right. Elon Musk. OK.” — JON STEWARTThe Punchiest Punchlines (The Donstitution Edition)“If you don’t like Trump tariffs, and not many people do, don’t you worry: One day he won’t be president — maybe.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“President Trump said in a new interview that he is ‘not joking’ about seeking a third term and added, ‘There are methods.’ In response, Senate majority leader Chuck Schumer announced that Democrats will have a plan in place to stop him by 2032.” — SETH MEYERS“In fact, he’s already working on some slogans for another run. I’m going to show you what I mean. First, there’s ‘Trump ’28: I Edited the Constitution With a Sharpie, and the Donstitution Says It’s Legal.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Up next, there’s ‘Trump ’28: Remember How Awesome It Was to Have a President in His 80s?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Here’s another one: ‘Trump ’28: Greenland Is Now Worth 300 Electoral Votes.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Then there’s ‘Trump ’28: It’s Totally Legal, According to New Supreme Court Justices Jake and Logan Paul.” — JIMMY FALLON“And, finally, ‘Trump ’28: If You Vote for Me, I’ll Add You to the Top-Secret Group Chat.’”— JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingOn Monday’s “Late Night,” the comedian Amber Ruffin addressed the White House Correspondents’ Association’s cancellation of her planned performance at its black-tie dinner.What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightMichelle Williams will discuss her new FX dramedy “Dying for Sex” on “The Late Show.”Also, Check This OutUsing footage the residents had filmed on a tiny camera, “Secret Mall Apartment” places their stunt in the context of the rapid gentrification that was happening at the time.Michael TownsendA new documentary, “Secret Mall Apartment,” recounts how eight artists managed to live in a shopping center from 2003 to 2007. More

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      Jon Stewart Thinks He May Be in the ‘Bomb Yemen’ Chat Group

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      The “Daily Show” host suspects that he, too, might have been invited to a discussion of secret war plans by a bumbling official in the Trump administration.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Invite OnlyTop officials in the Trump administration discussed secret plans to bomb Yemen on Signal, unaware that one of them had mistakenly added a journalist to the chat group.On Monday’s “Daily Show,” Jon Stewart applauded the administration for “once again carrying out its plans with competence and professionalism.”“You know, back in my day, if you were a journalist who wanted leaked war documents, you had to work the sources: meet them in a dark garage, earn their trust, pound the pavement. Now? You just wait for the national security adviser to be distracted by ‘White Lotus’ while he’s setting up his ‘Bomb Yemen’ group chat.” — JON STEWART“By the way, I might be in this group chat, I don’t know. I don’t check my group chats.” — JON STEWART“This is not helping Pete Hegseth’s reputation as a guy who is always drunk. I mean, this is a drunk guy mistake. This is the national security equivalent of airdropping a [expletive] pic to everyone in the office.” — TAYLOR TOMLINSON“I thought top-secret war meetings were held in a vault on top of a mountain. I didn’t know we were just droppin’ ’em in the chat. Turns out Hegseth was planning wars like a mom in a busy grocery store talking on speakerphone.” — TAYLOR TOMLINSON“Worst of all, now that journalist knows they’re all hanging out at Buffalo Wild Wings tonight, and they can’t uninvite him or it would be so awkward.” — TAYLOR TOMLINSON“He thought it was disinformation. Turned out it was just a bunch of fools, because the strikes started happening exactly as described in the texts. In other words, our national security is being guarded by a bunch of doofs you wouldn’t trust to throw your cousin a surprise party.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“No one on the chain thought to ask, ‘Who is JG? What are these initials?’ For all — they could have been leaking secrets to Jeff Goldblum, for all they know.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Skin-Colored Skin Edition)“Donald Trump truly is focused on the issues that matter most — to him, specifically.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yesterday, he posted — this is real — ‘Nobody likes a bad picture or painting of themselves, but the one in Colorado, in the State Capitol, put up by the governor, was purposefully distorted to a level that even I, perhaps, have never seen before.’ He doesn’t like this painting of him that they hung in the State Capitol building in Colorado. This is the portrait. I have to be honest: I agree with him on this one. It’s not a very good likeness. I mean, look how inaccurate the skin color is. His skin is the color of skin.” — JIMMY KIMMELWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Jon Stewart Isn’t Falling for Trump’s Golf Tournament ‘Win’

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      After the president claimed victory at his own club, Stewart compared him to “the Make-a-Wish Batman kid: ‘Hey, look at that, Donald. You caught all the criminals.’” Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Hole in NonePresident Trump declared on Sunday that he’d won a championship at Trump International Golf Club in Florida — not the first time he’d claimed victory at one of his own clubs.Jon Stewart mocked Trump’s announcement with some well-placed air quotes on Monday’s “Daily Show.”“Oh, he ‘won the tournament’ at ‘Trump International’? How did that happen?” Stewart said.“This dude’s whole life, he’s like the Make-a-Wish Batman kid: ‘Hey, look at that, Donald. You caught all the criminals.’” — JON STEWART“Look, I’m opposed to anyone rolling back American democracy, but I do tip the cap to any 78-year-old winning a golf tournament.” — JON STEWART“And, by the way, still having enough energy left to stroll into the command center in his golf attire to bomb the [expletive] out of Yemen! Yeah. Now, look, anyone can bomb the [expletive] out of Yemen after nine holes, but 18?” — JON STEWART“Who are the other players in this tournament? I mean, seriously, are there other golfers, or is it just Eric with his Fisher-Price clubs?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I want to see a full 580-page investigation of this tournament. I want to know everything. I want scorecards, I want video, I want affidavits from the caddies, I want a forensic investigation of every divot he didn’t bother to replace. How is it possible that this guy beats every other golfer every year?” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (St. Patrick’s Day Edition)“Happy St. Patrick’s Day. Once again, it is cabbage’s night to shine tonight.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“You know what? The way things have been going lately, it’s nice to have an excuse to drink on a Monday.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“That’s right, people getting lit on a Monday morning. For one day, everyone gets to feel what it’s like to be a pilot for Southwest.” — JIMMY FALLONWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Late Night Laughs at DOGE’s Work Force Demand

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      “It’s like the government is being run by BuzzFeed,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Monday about Elon Musk’s work-tracking request to federal employees.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Return to SenderOn Saturday, Elon Musk emailed federal employees and asked them to respond with their top five accomplishments during the previous workweek or risk being fired.“It’s like the government is being run by BuzzFeed,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Monday.“It’s not just that they’re firing thousands of federal workers; it is the glee with which they’re firing. Ordinarily, you have some compassion when you lay people off — you wish them well, you thank them for their work. Not MAGA. Not the DOGE Bros.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Federal workers who got this email had no idea what to do, and their Trump administration bosses didn’t seem to know, either. New Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard told personnel at spy agencies not to respond. F.B.I. Director Kash Patel told F.B.I. staff to pause any responses, and Health and Human Services Secretary RFK Jr. sent out an email saying, ‘Free roadkill in the break room!’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Our federal work force is in the clutches of a heartless billionaire who wants to colonize Mars with vehicles shaped like his penis, by which I mean Cybertrucks. He should see a doctor.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“I mean, seriously, if that guy walked into your office and told you he was there to start making cuts, everybody would jump on him and put him in a headlock, right? You’d zip-tie him and hold him until the cops showed up.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Five Things I Did Last Week Edition)“Well, guys, I’m having an odd day. This morning I got an email from NBC asking what I accomplished last week.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, they need to respond with five accomplishments from the last week. Federal workers wrote back: ‘I received this email, I opened this email, I read this email, I laughed at this email, and I deleted this email.’” — JIMMY FALLON“He followed up by tweeting, ‘Failure to respond will be taken as a resignation.’ Now, obviously, the only proper email response to that is: ‘What did I do last week? Your mom, your mom, your mom, your mom, and your mom.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Of course, the workers were furious, mostly about getting a work email on a Saturday.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingJon Oliver scrutinized Facebook’s new posting policies on Sunday’s episode of “Last Week Tonight.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightThe “St. Denis Medical” star Wendi McLendon-Covey will sit down with Desi Lydic on Tuesday’s “The Daily Show.”Also, Check This Out“Leigh Bowery,” by Fergus Greer (1988), from the exhibition “Leigh Bowery!” at Tate Modern in London.Fergus Greer. Courtesy of The Michael Hoppen GalleryA new Leigh Bowery exhibition at Tate Modern will introduce the artist’s work to a broader audience. More

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      John Oliver Interrupts Jon Stewart’s Monologue on ‘The Daily Show’

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      The British host of “Last Week Tonight” said he wanted to be “the first to welcome America to its monarchy era.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Monarchy in the U.S.A.The British comedian, “Daily Show” alumnus and “Last Week Tonight” host John Oliver crashed Jon Stewart’s monologue on Monday.“Are you here to offer America your wisdom and counsel?” Stewart asked.“Oh, no, no, no, no, Jon — I’m here to gloat!” Oliver said.“America had its little fun, didn’t you, experimenting with democracy? You fought so hard to get away from us — acting up, throwing all that tea into the harbor. You still owe us for that, by the way.” — JOHN OLIVER“The point is, you told everybody that you were going to be different. You weren’t going to turn out like your mean old dad who was so horrible to you when you were growing up. So we sat back, we let you spend your wild teen years experimenting with your ridiculous ideas of checks and balances, because deep down, we knew that once you got that nonsense out of your system, you’d be back. In fact, if I may sing from ‘Hamilton.’” [sounds pitch pipe] — JOHN OLIVER“What I’m saying is, let me be the first to welcome America to its monarchy era. Congratulations, everyone, you can now take your place in the pantheon of great empires alongside the British, the Roman, the Klingon, Wakanda, whatever one Babar the elephant was the ruler of, I forget.” — JOHN OLIVER“What I’m saying is, don’t fight being a monarchy, Jon, embrace it. Kings get [expletive] done. Now, is it stuff that you want done? Not necessarily. But they do move quick! They taste cumin at lunch, and they’ve taken over an entire continent by dinner time. That is how the British rolls, Jon. [Expletive] everyone else. They’re not like us. In fact, if I may sing a line from Mr. Kendrick Lamar.” [sounds pitch pipe] — JOHN OLIVERStewart pushed back against “Ambassador Oliver,” saying that the imperial model may not suit America: “Not to be shortsighted, but, spoiler alert, John, things didn’t end up so great for the British Empire.”“We are technically between empires at the moment, but we’re keeping our castles warm and our crowns bejeweled for the day that we get back onto our feet.” — JOHN OLIVER“Have you seen anything America has done over the last 50 years? Because for a country that doesn’t want to be an empire, you’re doing a pretty [expletive] good impression of one right now: invasions, economic exploitations, and now, suggesting turning Gaza into a beachfront casino? Even King George would have been, like, ‘I don’t know, guys. Feels like the situation’s a bit more complicated than that, and I’m literally dying of medieval brain disease.’” — JOHN OLIVER“This shouldn’t be a sad time. The arc of history is so long it eventually becomes a circle, and you end up right where you started. You might even call it the circle of life. In fact, if I may sing the great imperial subject Sir Elton John’s opening Zulu chant from ‘The Lion King.’”[sounds pitch pipe] — JOHN OLIVERThe Punchiest Punchlines (Less-Than-Super Bowl Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More