You’ve got to roll with it, so stop crying your heart out and definitely maybe don’t look back in anger because some might say they’re gonna slide away and get supersonic with cigarettes and alcohol flowing among those married with children (sorry)
The time’s almost upon us, ‘r kid. Anoraks are being packed, parkas too, as 1.4million lucky Oasis fans prepare to hit some of the biggest venues in the country.
The Gallagher brothers will reunite on Friday evening at Cardiff’s Principality Stadium, before heading to London, Manchester, Dublin and Edinburgh over the coming weeks.
News sites, papers, social media platforms and more are crawling with chatter, advice, tips, buzz and excitement – in fact it’s impossible to escape Oasis mania.
Through all the noise, the masses are preparing to have it large, do those jackets all the way up to the top, let those mono-brows grow, and do some potentially offensive Manchester accents. Britain’s mad fer-it.
It’s been a long time, though, since Oasis mania 1.0. Some of those around at the time may well have forgotten the minutia of the Mad-chester days, and many ticket holders were in nappies when it was all kicking off the first time around.
So we have some tips to help you prepare…
What to wear
Oasis’ style is the stuff of legend. Fashion-focussed titles like GQ have often referred to moments in time where the lineup, which also includes the likes of Paul ‘Bonehead’ Arthurs and Andy Bell, were the most stylish in the world.
But it ain’t the 90s any more, and while the decade still lives rent-free in the minds of students and people in techno clubs, mixing in a modern flavour with the styles of the band is more likely the way to go.
The football option is always there, but if you aren’t a Manchester City fan, you’re probably best leaving the colours at home.
Bucket hats and anoraks are, of course, always a good shout, but keep it simple and classy, not too gaudy – no one looks good in a pearlescent cannabis leaf bucket hat; instead, think more Kangol.
Some of their best looks have been their simplest. Both Liam and Noel have been known to pull off an easy-going long sleeve shirt (done all the way up to the top, of course) and a pair of shades, while a leather jacket is also an easy win, so don’t feel like you have to overplay the look.
Sports jackets and anoraks are, of course, a key part of the uniform, but again, keep it subtle and avoid looking like a creature rolling out of a sweaty student club at seven in the morning.
Remember, many of the brothers’ best looks were actually pretty smart and thoughtful, don’t just lob on the first cliche you find in the charity shop.
What not to wear
Britpop is a tale of two halves: Oasis and their London rivals, Blur. Damon Albarn and his merry band of – in the words of Oasis – “middle class art students” were taking the British music scene by storm around the same time as Oasis, and the the pair came to represent various contrasting parts of British society: north v south, London v Manchester and working class vs middle class.
After securing number one in the charts, Blur bassist Alex James amusingly wore an Oasis shirt to rub the Mancunians’ noses in it, so counterintuitively that particular branded shirt (black with a white box and the words Oasis in) might be best avoided.
Although Oasis have leaned heavily on mod style for their own outfits over the years, Albarn’s ‘mod-ual’ – and blend of mod and casual clothing – was a standout item in the southerner’s repertoire. He wore a wider range of items, often in a slightly more chiller and less grungy way than the Gallaghers.
He also incorporated street and skate style into his look to, which is all a roundabout way of saying ‘don’t wear any of this stuff’.
What to eat
For an authentic Oasis experience, you’ll want to fill up on classic British stodge before heading out. You could take inspiration from Noel Gallagher and choose his favourite meal of sausages, chips and gravy, washed down with a lovely cup of tea. Liam is apparently partial to a Sunday roast.
What to drink
Oasis themselves aren’t fussy – Liam once admitted his favourite drink is “alcohol”. His pre-show routine of “half a bottle of brandy” with honey and hot water will probably help you to belt out the lyrics to Wonderwall. Whatever it does for your vocal cords, you’ll be too hammered to care.
Where to stand
If you’ve got standing tickets, you’ll need to do some maths, so maybe bring a notebook. For each of the following, give yourself a score out of 10: 1. How big are you? 2. How drunk are you? 3. How comfortable are you with physical injury? 4. How much do you like Oasis? Add them all up – if your total’s over 35, you’ll want to head down the front.
How to get to the bar
Whatever the venue, it’s going to be packed. Luckily, we have the perfect solution. To guarantee quick and hassle-free service, you need to time your visits to coincide with Oasis’ best songs. We recommend heading over just as you hear the opening guitar riff of Cigarettes and Alcohol. The chorus of Wonderwall is another practical option.
How to avoid getting covered in beer (and/or any other fluid)
We’re sad to report that at some previous Oasis gigs, a ‘tradition’ has emerged for fans throwing bottles of urine into the crowd. Firstly, do not do this. What would your mum say? There’s going to be beer – and possibly spittle – sloshing about, but your trusty Manc fashion could be the solution. Dig out your best cagoule, preferably one with a hood and a drawstring.
How to get to the loo
See ‘how to get to the bar’. Any other solution is none of our business and probably quite grim.
How to avoid fights
To keep your pre-show banter Supersonic, you might want to steer clear of a few topics. This isn’t the place for your Blur t-shirt or your Man United kit. Keep your loathing for monobrows firmly under wraps, don’t attempt a Mancunian accent (unless you already have one) and don’t ask anyone if they’re a Scouser. If you’d prefer to start a fight, just reverse any of the above.
How to get home
You’ve had the night of your life, but now it’s 4am and the next Uber’s six hours away. Once again, your trusty Manc clobber is going to be your saviour. It’s the middle of summer, so your parka can double as a serviceable duvet. Find some sticks and shove them in the arms of your cagoule to make a tent, then sleep it off and try again in the morning.
Key phrases to say – but ideally only if you’re Mancunian
“Mad fer it” – Enthusiastic or excited.
“Our kid” – A term of endearment between siblings or close friends.
“Bobbins” – Rubbish. Like missing out on Oasis tickets.
“Mint” – Very good indeed.
“Sound” – Good, ok or acceptable, depending on the context.
“Chuddy” – Chewing gum. There might be a bit of this about.
“Mither” – Bother or hassle.
“Give your ‘ead a wobble” – You might want to reconsider your choice.
Source: Celebrities - dailystar.co.uk
