Lisa Appleton is back sharing her tips and tricks for to help Daily Star Online readers with their sex problems.
Last week, she was helping advise someone whose girlfriend wanted them to become a throuple – Lisa wasn’t keen on the idea, and advised the guy to suggest to his girlfriend to spice up their sex lives in a different way.
This week, Lisa is helping advise a woman whose boyfriend wants to try anal sex, but she’s scared about trying it, as she’s worried it will hurt.
Lisa Appleton helps Daily Star Online readers with their nookie nightmares
‘Boyfriend wants to try anal sex – but I’m scared it will hurt’
Dear Lisa,
My boyfriend and I have been together for two years now and while we still really love each other, the spark has vanished somewhat.
This has had a considerable impact on our sex life. It has become very vanilla and samey.
And while I would never think about straying, it has made me slightly bored.
The communication is really good between my boyfriend and I, so we were discussing the lack of excitement and suggesting ways in which we could spice it up.
After much discussion, my boyfriend suggested we try anal in addition to vaginal sex, and seemed really keen.
I’m happy to give anything a shot to try and improve our current situation but I’m not going to lie, this option terrifies me somewhat.
I’ve heard horror stories from my friends who have tried it with their boyfriends and said how painful it is.
I really don’t think I want to do it, but I don’t want to disappoint my boyfriend and I do want to improve our sex life.
What should I do Lisa?
Anonymous
Lisa says:
You’re in a relationship and it’s just so natural to experiment. Sometimes it does get vanilla and samey and you can be in a routine and you’ve got to change it.
Change the positions, change the times you’re doing it, and things like that.
And for any loving couple that experiments or is looking to experiment with anal sex, it can be very, very exciting. It can be really renew a relationship but you can hear these horror stories that it is painful and nobody wants to feel pain.
You want to feel pleasure. So, first of all, if you’re going to consider anal sex in addition to vaginal sex, you’ve got to not be nervous and let go of any anxiety or fear. Because that’s going to make your a**e go tighter.
And that’s where the old saying comes from tight a**e haha. But no, in all seriousness, you’re going to feel tense, basically.
So, with this, first of all, eliminate fear, anxiety and believe nothing of what you hear and half of what you see.
“And then if you are going to try anal sex for the first time, I would recommend – and I’ve heard this from many, many friends and acquaintances – and people I know and stuff, you need to be very, very relaxed, and you can’t be stressed.
And if you go to Ann Summers and get a lubricating cream that are safe for internal use, and they have got little finger vibrators and finger tools in Ann Summers and stuff and in Naughty but Nice that are designed for your finger, as you don’t want a dirty nail up there to loosen it off, because the muscles around your anus are very tight and you can’t ever just whack it up or force it in because it isn’t going to happen and it’s going to cause a lot of pain.
So you’ve got to do it very gently and in a relaxed state and slowly so I would recommend get some lubricant and the finger vibrating tool, as you don’t want a sharp, dirty nail going up there as it could cause damage and infection.
And if you just do it very gradually and slowly, you’ll get used to it and you’ll open up and start to get more comfortable. And then get a bigger vibrating tool that’s slightly bigger than the first and just slowly try that.
Then with your anus lubricated and relaxed, there’s no harm with your boyfriend trying to put his penis in – just an inch or two and just relax and you should be absolutely fine. And don’t force it in and go in and out like a right pounding because you don’t want to damage anything – it’s got to be nice and gentle.
But I’ve heard a lot of people saying it’s enjoyable, if it’s done correctly.
But if still is causing you loads of anxiety and fear then it’s something you may need to have a deeper think about, but don’t worry, it’s completely normal to have those feelings.”
Source: Celebrities - dailystar.co.uk
