Last week, Lisa Appleton was giving advice to a couple who, ahead of the lockdown, were avid doggers.
However, due to social distancing, their dogging plans were scuppered, therefore Lisa suggested they watch dogging-related porn, look at role-play or do a strip-tease.
This week, Lisa is helping a man who’s frustrated with always having to be the dominant one and taking the lead.
‘I want her to dominate, I’m sick of taking the lead’
Dear Lisa,
My girlfriend and me have been together for five years – we met during our last year at uni on a night out. She came back to mine and ended up staying for two weeks!
The sex was electric and I was absolutely smitten – she’s absolutely gorgeous and hilariously funny.
Not long after uni wrapped, we moved in together and I feel like I fell in love with her even more, and it was all great. But during our last year together, the sex has just become a bit vanilla and it feels like I’m always initiating it.
I want to be dominated for a change like the old days, and I want her to throw me down on the bed, but she doesn’t seem that bothered.
I’m not the type to cheat but I’ve got a healthy sexual appetite and I’m starting to lose interest in keep being the one to take the lead.
What can I do to encourage her to take charge for once?
Thanks,
Anonymous
Lisa says:
Lisa Appleton talks sex and relationships
Well, if you’re a male, from the male point of view, and you’re wanting her to take charge for once, don’t forget going back to animal instincts, it is the male who is usually the more dominant one when it comes to mating.
So as we’ve evolved as humans, we do tend to get the women being more dominant, but predominantly it’s the men.
And the thing is, with us women and if you’re in a relationship with a man and say you’ve had a hard day at work and you come in and you put your feet up, or you’re stressed or mithered, or you’re watching the football or the rugby, or you’re reading the paper, the last thing we are going to do, is to try and get your trousers off.
Women tend to wait for that moment where there’s a bit of twitch or that moment and we can pick up on it pretty well – so sometimes it’s about communication.
It’s great to have a good sex life and obviously you’ve been together since uni, and you love each other – she’s hilarious and funny – and that’s hard to find, you’re lucky there, so you’ve to try and keep hold of her.
I think it’s how you approach it, so, always approach it when you’re both relaxed and not rushing around and she’s about to go out.
It’s about just engaging in that conversation at the right time. And just discuss that is usually the male who will take that role, but you’d find it super exciting and it would really turn you on if she did it to you and surprised you every now and then – and to not be too scared or shy and just go for it and get stuck in.
Keep it light-hearted – that always helps, and just reassure her how much you love her and how sexy she is, and maybe she thought that you may not be interested if you decided to pounce on her one night and just say ‘Surprise me sometime this week, baby.’
If you’re in a female/female relationship, it’s the same thing, one of you will tend to be the more dominant one and will tend to make the move more than the other and the other one will be submissive.
And it’s the same, if you want a change and want them to be the more dominant one for a change, it’s just all about communication and telling your partner how much you love them and how sexy they are. And just say how exciting it would be if they were to pounce on you one night completely unexpectedly.
Just keep it light-hearted. Anyway, I wish you all the best.
Lisa Appleton returns next week to answer more of your sexual problems
Source: Celebrities - dailystar.co.uk
