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An Empire State of Panic
New York City has been hit hard by Covid-19, with more than 1,550 coronavirus-related deaths as of Tuesday.
“Recently, it has gone from the city that never sleeps to the city that lays awake every night filled with existential dread,” Trevor Noah joked on Tuesday night’s “The Daily Social Distancing Show.”
This week, the Navy sent in a U.S. hospital ship, the Comfort, to dock in New York and help handle patients. Beginning Monday night, the city paid tribute to emergency workers by lighting the Empire State Building red and white, flashing like an ambulance beacon.
“Because if there’s one thing we’ve learned from the crisis it’s that you definitely want to be on a giant ship.” — JIMMY FALLON
“It has 1,000 hospital beds on-site, which New Yorkers are so excited about. So excited that yesterday a crowd gathered to welcome the boat to the city, which is obviously extremely counterproductive in social distancing land, but it also shows you how much New York has changed. Yeah, because normally we hate it when people show up to the city. Like a month ago, New Yorkers would have gathered to throw rats at that boat: ‘Your mother says hello!’” — TREVOR NOAH
“Last night, the building lit up like a siren to honor the medical workers serving on the front line of the epidemic. This might be a good idea when they first pitched it, but as someone who lives in New York, it was terrifying. The Empire State Building, the giant light flashing around — and can you imagine if someone was high in their living room? They must have freaked out. ‘[Expletive], dude! I think we’re getting pulled over by that building!’” — TREVOR NOAH
“Yep, everyone was confused by the red and white flashing lights. At first, New Yorkers thought it meant Target finally got a shipment of toilet paper.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Pull over! The Empire State Building is flashing its lights!” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“When they saw that, New Yorkers were like, ‘That’s great. Maybe next time could you give us a heads up? I thought we were being invaded by North Korea.’” — JIMMY FALLON
The Punchiest Punchlines (MyPillow Edition)
“During President Trump’s press briefing yesterday about the pandemic, he invited the founder of MyPillow to speak, at which point I used my pillow to scream into.” — SETH MEYERS
“It’s no surprise Trump would introduce the MyPillow guy at a presidential briefing. It’s a tradition going back to Harry Truman announcing victory in the Pacific with Chef Boyardee.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“That’s right, the founder of MyPillow spoke at a coronavirus press briefing yesterday and encouraged Americans to use the time they’re self-isolating to read their Bibles. Oh, I don’t know — between the plague and the false idol next to you, I think the Bible is going to feel redundant.” — SETH MEYERS
The Bits Worth Watching
The “Queer Eye” star Jonathan Van Ness offered Jimmy Fallon some helpful tips on home-based quarantine haircuts.
What We’re Excited About on Wednesday Night
Joe Biden and Lady Gaga will be virtual guests on “The Tonight Show.”
Also, Check This Out
There’s never been a better time to follow new comedians on Instagram.
Source: Television - nytimes.com
