“CPAC stands for ‘Clowns Periodically Assembling in Convention Centers,’” Jimmy Kimmel joked on Wednesday.
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‘Gathering of the MAGA-los’
The annual Conservative Political Action Conference kicked off outside of Washington on Wednesday.
Jimmy Kimmel called it “the annual gathering of the MAGA-los,” saying the conference is “a chance for the far right to get together and share crazy thoughts.”
“CPAC stands for ‘Clowns Periodically Assembling in Convention Centers.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“It’s basically Coachella for people who post on Facebook in all caps.” — JIMMY FALLON
“They started it with the traditional 21 assault rifle salute and the pledge of allegiance to Donald Trump.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“CPAC calls itself ‘the largest and most influential gathering of conservatives in the world.’ The speeches will be serious, while the people trying to dance at the after-party will be hilarious.” — JIMMY FALLON
“The conference is being held at the Gaylord Harbor National Resort and Convention Center, which is another reason Mike Pence won’t come.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“They’ve got some great panels lined up this year. These are real — we didn’t make these up. These are not jokes. People pay to go see panels like ‘No Chinese Balloons Above Tennessee,’ ‘Sacking the Woke Playbook,’ ‘Parents with Pitchforks.’ I saw Parents with Pitchforks at Coachella last year. Really good band.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“But this is nice: After each speech, there will be a QAnon — I’m sorry, Q. and A.” — JIMMY FALLON
The Punchiest Punchlines (Women’s History Month Edition)
“Today is March 1, which means it is the start of Women’s History Month. Exactly right. Yeah. Just remember, behind every great woman is a man loudly repeating her ideas.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Women’s History Month started as Women’s History Week back in 1982, and then somebody thought, you know, ‘Hey, women should probably get more time than sharks on the Discovery Channel.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“It’s an opportunity to look back at the history of women’s rights, especially this year, when so many of women’s rights are history.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Bits Worth Watching
Hasan Minhaj deactivated his Twitter account on air during Wednesday night’s “Daily Show.”
What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night
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Source: Television - nytimes.com
