Phillip Schofield says he has ‘lost everything’ and asks ‘do you want me to die’

Phillip Schofield has said he has “lost everything” and asked “do you want me to die” in an interview following news of his affair.

The former This Morning presenter spoke to the BBC earlier this morning (June 2) in the wake of the news of his affair with a young male colleague breaking last week.

The 61-year-old spoke told the broadcaster that he feels his “career is over” and that he has “lost everything”.

READ MORE: Phillip Schofield ‘broken and ashamed’ over affair but declares ‘I’m not a groomer’

Although he admitted that the affair was a “grave error”, he reiterated that the pair were “not boyfriends” and had engaged in romantic encounters just a half a dozen times – “nothing more than that”.

He said: “I have to talk about television in the past tense, which breaks my heart. I have lost everything.

“What am I going to do with my days? I see nothing ahead of me but blackness, and sadness, and regret, and remorse, and guilt.

“I did something very wrong, and then I lied about it consistently.”

He even said that the past week made him understand how Caroline Flack had been before she tragically took her life.

“It is relentless, and it is day after day, after day after day,” he said.

“If you don’t think that that is going to have the most catastrophic effect on someone’s mind… do want me to die? Because that’s where I am. I have lost everything.”

He went on: “How much do you want a man to take? Are you truly only happy when he’s dead? This is how Caroline Flack felt, and it didn’t stop, and I know I’ve done something wrong, and I’ve owned up to doing something wrong, but constant friends texting me, ‘Mate, this is relentless, when’s it gonna stop? What’s the agenda?’ Someone said, ‘You’re being treated like Jack the Ripper.’

“I haven’t looked at a single thing, that would be the single thing. I took off all the apps, I haven’t looked at the news but well meaning people come through, ‘Can’t believe they’ve said this.’ Still it comes, it is utterly relentless, uncontrolled, online.”

He revealed that his colleague was just 20 years old when they first had any sort of sexual contact — which took place in his ITV dressing room — and that he blamed himself for the affair, despite it being “consensual”.

He explained: “He is an innocent party here. I was older, I should have known better. [The affair] was consensual, but it was my fault.”

He added that he has had suicidal thoughts since the news broke, crediting his daughters for his desire to keep fighting on.

“Last week, if my daughters hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t be here. They’ve been by my side every moment because they’re scared to let me out of their sight,” he said.

The presenter revealed that he believes that homophobia played a part in the huge backlash that he received, exclaiming that: “If it was male-female then it wouldn’t be such a scandal.”

He said: “I fully appreciate there is a massive age gap, but that happens in life.

“I think there is an enormous amount of homophobia that it happens to be male, but if it was male-female then it wouldn’t be such a scandal.”

He confirmed that his This Morning co-star Holly Willoughby “did not know” about the affair, adding that “nobody knew – to my knowledge”.

“Our makeup room was a sanctuary so you tell everything in that room,” he said. “Holly knows everything about me, I know everything about Holly. Holly did not know, nobody knew. I didn’t tell anybody.”

However he acknowledged that someone must have known something for rumours to have started.

He also confirmed that both he and the younger man had been asked about the affair when rumours first started, though “it wasn’t formal”.

According to Phil, he and the other man did not coordinate their responses.

During the interview, Schofe was directly asked about grooming accusations – despite the younger man’s age.

He said: “I would say that the initial list of things [alleged to have happened] was not right anyway…. it was a totally innocent picture, a totally innocent Twitter follow of which I follow 11,400 people, and then it was a completely innocent backwards and forwards over a period of time about a job, about careers.

“What’s wrong with talking to someone no matter what age they are. Does that mean if you’re following anyone on Twitter does that mean you absolutely don’t talk to anybody else or you don’t give advice?

“I disagree with the summation that you just gave because that does paint a very grave picture.”

As part of the outrage of the news of his affair, the TV star was also dropped as an ambassador for the Prince’s Trust, something he said “broke my heart”.

Schofield added he “absolutely did not” make the man sign a non-disclosure agreement and said he would be free to speak to the media if he wanted to.

He also said he was not paid off over the affair, though Phil was paying for his ongoing legal support.

Phillip was asked, if there was no NDA or injunction to prevent the press from ever reporting on the affair, why was it coming out now.

He responded: “It got too big. The lie got too big for both of us, it just got enormous. It was growing and growing and growing and it crossed over from online to mainstream news.”

For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org, visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website.

To stay up to date with all the latest news, make sure you sign up to one of our newsletters here.

Source: Celebrities - dailystar.co.uk