Readers’ Picks: 12 Pride Anthems

Dear listeners,

A few weeks ago, I asked you to submit songs to help create the ultimate Pride playlist. As usual, you delivered. Big time.

Today’s Amplifier is made up entirely of your suggestions and your stories. Some of these songs gave you the courage and enthusiasm to come out, and some are the tracks that you think best encapsulate the spirit of Pride.

A few might be a little obvious — could we really have a Pride playlist without Diana Ross and Sister Sledge? — but that just makes them easier to share with your chosen family. Some of these songs address the queer experience directly, while others have been adopted — perhaps with a flair of camp — as unofficial anthems. And, as you may have guessed, almost all of them will make you want to dance.

Thank you to each and every one of you who submitted a song and your comments; it was a total joy to read about the ways that music has played such a vital role in your struggles, your triumphs and your self-expression. As one reader (who also wrote the entry for the fourth song on the playlist) so eloquently put it, “Pride is all about overcoming the shame, the fear, the darkness in our lives and coming alive.” Amen to that.

Listen along on Spotify as you read.

1. Thelma Houston: “Don’t Leave Me This Way”

1976 was the year I “emerged.” I discovered the joy and positive energy in the clubs filled with others like me. We danced and built important, supportive friendships, and found safety in numbers. Coming out was a longer journey of self-acceptance. This song was heard over and over, and brought everyone out on the dance floor together. It gave me hope. — Mark Pettygrove, Palm Springs, Calif. (Listen on YouTube)

2. Perfume Genius: “Slip Away”

Most of Perfume Genius’s songs speak to queer desires/experiences, but this one is especially colorful. “Slip Away” is a queer ballad about a relationship constantly under scrutiny by others, ultimately choosing each other over external pressures. It took years for me to start dating after I came out, but this song continued to remind me of the validity and power of queer love, no matter what anyone else may say or do. — Arley Sakai, Portland, Ore. (Listen on YouTube)

3. Sophie B. Hawkins: “Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover”

“Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover” by Sophie B Hawkins gave voice to my gay teen desire in a way that I couldn’t articulate at the time. She sings about a kind of exquisite longing that is so germane to the queer experience: uncontrollably erotic, unrequited, transgressive and liberating. This song gave me permission to step into feelings that had hitherto been scary to me. It gave me permission to love. — Brendan Healy, Toronto (Listen on YouTube)

4. Joe Jackson: “Steppin’ Out”

I moved to San Francisco when this song was popular, and while the song is not specifically L.G.B.T.Q.-themed, it was all about the strong positive energy of living life out loud. San Francisco was a place to explore who I was, to get away from family and expectations and fears. I knew Joe Jackson was gay … I felt that he was talking to us! — David Silver, Kalaheo, Hawaii (Listen on YouTube)

5. Tom Robinson Band: “2-4-6-8 Motorway”

This was 1978, and my biggest fear as a teenage proto-gay in Scranton, Pa., was not that I would be shunned by my family, or die alone, or anything similarly dramatic. I worried that I would have to grow a mustache and learn to love disco. The existence of the out gay rocker Tom Robinson suggested that there were other options. “(Sing if You’re) Glad to Be Gay” is a more obvious T.R. choice, but “2-4-6-8 Motorway” was much more fun. — Michael Logan, Los Angeles (Listen on YouTube)

6. Bronski Beat: “Smalltown Boy”

As a 19-year-old gay woman, the song “Smalltown Boy” by Bronski Beat gave me courage to come out and escape to a world where women could love women, men could love men. “Smalltown Boy” is not necessarily about running away from a heterosexual upbringing but toward pride, freedom and acceptance. — Dawn Groundwater, New York (Listen on YouTube)

7. Madonna: “Holiday”

I like to joke that I came out the same time Madonna’s first album did. Coming out in suburbia in 1983 was so different. There were zero role models and not even a place to go to find my people. To me, “Holiday” was a metaphor for that place where I could live inside a bright, shiny rainbow. — J.P. Streeter, Alameda, Calif. (Listen on YouTube)

8. Pet Shop Boys: “Go West”

When I need a burst of gay freedom I dance it out to “Go West” by the Pet Shop Boys. It makes me feel like there’s a perfect place where I can really start a new life … in the open air … where people like us are free to be who we are! Go ahead and listen to it. I dare you to not be dancing by the end! — Jack Terry, Northville, Mich. (Listen on YouTube)

9. CeCe Peniston: “Finally”

I was a couple of years into my military career and had been on temporary duty in June 2001. I took a few extra days of leave at the end, which happened to coincide with Seattle Pride. Even though it was cool and rained off and on, the outdoor stage at the Eagle had CeCe singing “Finally” at the first Pride event I’d ever attended, and it felt amazing to “finally” be there. She gave it her all for the slightly damp crowd. I couldn’t believe my luck to hear these ladies I’d hammed to in high school and went back for Pride in Seattle a couple more times when I could. — Eric, Kentucky (Listen on YouTube)

10. Diana Ross: “I’m Coming Out”

My coming out song at the age of 38 was “I’m Coming Out” by Diana Ross. After all of the great disco/gay-themed songs of the late ’70s, this is the one that got to me and led me to take that big step, partly due to the fact that it was by the legendary Diana Ross, who had such influence, being a global star. Everyone loved this song, making it an easy access statement for me in my quest to come out. — Harry N. Cohen, Queens (Listen on YouTube)

11. Cass Elliot: “Make Your Own Kind of Music”

Every single word of that song captures the feelings of knowing you are different and sharing that with the world will be hard. It may be rough, you may be alone, but you have that special song that the world needs to hear. Somehow, the dose of reality in that song, that you may lose some people in your life who “cannot take your hand,” is oddly reassuring. There may be a price to pay to sing your song, but it pales in comparison to the feeling of being free to sing it. I heard it first in the movie “Beautiful Thing,” bought the soundtrack, listened to it on repeat for what seemed liked hundreds of times and then came out to my family and friends. — Jared Schrock, Pittsburgh (Listen on YouTube)

12. Sister Sledge: “We Are Family”

As a young woman who grew up in a small town in Oklahoma, I felt quite alone as I realized I was a lesbian. The first time I heard “We Are Family” by Sister Sledge in a gay/lesbian bar and every person in the room hit the dance floor for a group dance, I knew I wasn’t alone. Many of us have to create our own families, families of choice, because our biological families rebuke us. “We Are Family” says right out loud that you can create a family. — Becky Wood, North Carolina (Listen on YouTube)

“We Are Family” still feels like optimism one dreams for in Pride — in melody, production, lyric, and in spirit, more so than any other song I know of. — Patience Newbury

At the legendary show bar/entertainment complex El Goya in Ybor City, Fla., the entire drag show cast came onto the stage at the end of the Friday and Saturday night performances to lead the S.R.O. crowd in this iconic song. By this time the eclectic and dapper crowd have abandoned their tables to line the perimeter of the ample show bar and belt out the song right along with the queens. For the first time in my life, I felt a part of a group. Seems like we all had arrived at a big family reunion and everyone knew all the words as we joined hands and looked each other right in the eye. Finally, we were united and we were home. — Nina Gros, Louisville, Ky.

Padam padam,

Lindsay

The Amplifier Playlist

Listen on Spotify. We update this playlist with each new newsletter.

“Readers’ Picks! 12 Pride Anthems” track list
Track 1: Thelma Houston, “Don’t Leave Me This Way”
Track 2: Perfume Genius, “Slip Away”
Track 3: Sophie B. Hawkins, “Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover”
Track 4: Joe Jackson, “Steppin’ Out”
Track 5: Tom Robinson Band, “2-4-6-8 Motorway”
Track 6: Bronski Beat, “Smalltown Boy”
Track 7: Madonna, “Holiday”
Track 8: Pet Shop Boys, “Go West”
Track 9: CeCe Peniston, “Finally”
Track 10: Diana Ross, “I’m Coming Out”
Track 11: Cass Elliot, “Make Your Own Kind of Music”
Track 12: Sister Sledge, “We Are Family”

Bonus tracks

Yes, this playlist is mostly upbeat and celebratory, but plenty of you also shared the songs that made you feel seen in your lower moments. I particularly appreciated this suggestion, from Kenny in Brooklyn, of the young Chicago singer-songwriter Claud’s melancholy ballad “Tommy”:

“This song helped me name the unique depression that comes with body dysmorphia. Listening to ‘Tommy’ made me realize that I will be happier in relationships once I accept being trans. It’s a very sad song about not being seen in your body, and there’s a comfort that comes with sharing and naming that sadness with others.”