Hollyoaks star Jennifer Metcalfe says her character’s bowel cancer storyline is acting as therapy after bottling up childhood grief following the loss of her dad to the disease.
Viewers found out last night that much-loved character Mercedes McQueen is fighting for her life – 25 years after Jen’s dad died.
She says: “I was 15 when my dad died and I never really dealt with it, never knew how to. It probably would have helped to talk about it and take time out, but when I got offered two weeks off school I was like, ‘Why? I don’t need it, I’ll go back.’
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“So doing this storyline has given me the chance to finally deal with it. All these years on, I’ve done some raw grieving. Doing the scenes has been like therapy I’ve needed for 25 years.”
Tackling such a personal topic has challenged the actress in ways her previous scripts have never done before.
There have been many times where Jennifer has been uncertain whether she could make it through a scene. She admits: “I’ve had first-hand experience with the emotion of this issue and find it difficult talking about it.
“When I first started doing the storyline, it was tough. I had to take myself into a room and go onto set when I was ready.
“When I first got on set, I didn’t know how I was going to do it – there are a lot of waves of emotion and I could barely do a scene without getting choked up.”
In the end it was her dad himself that gave Jennifer the push to make him proud.
She says: “I was asking my mum to send me pictures of my dad, listening to his funeral song Every Breath You Take and tapped into a different area that I’d not tapped into as an actress before.
“I wanted to deliver a raw performance. When I filmed some of the scenes, I felt all the emotion. It felt beautiful and like I was letting go of the pain I’ve had for 25 years.”
In shocking scenes that aired on Monday night, the star’s trademark long, shiny brunette hair was hidden using prosthetics to make Jennifer look bald during chemotherapy sessions.
Along with the chemo port on her shoulder, Jennifer, 41, will also be seen wearing a colostomy bag and the already slender star’s shrinking frame will make the scenes even more stark.
She says: “I’ve had a lot going on lately, and when I get anxiety, I struggle to eat. I’ve lost quite a lot of weight and wanted that to stay for this storyline – to turn something unhealthy into something good for the storyline.
(Image: Ean Flanders)
“Looking at myself with no hair and a colostomy bag, I felt like I had cancer. I felt vulnerable.
“When I got home one night after filming, I stared at the ceiling for two hours. I felt like I had four epiphanies, I was so deep in my own head.”
To help push herself on screen, Jennifer turned to the charity Cancer Research where real case studies helped her understand how Mercedes would be processing the situation.
She says: “We’ve been in contact with Cancer Research so they can help me but the thing about cancer is people deal with it differently.
“I wanted to find a way that I could tap into my experience with my dad and work out how Mercedes would feel.”
And the soap favourite hopes raising awareness will encourage people to get check-ups.
Jennifer says: “Soaps are so important – they are really powerful. This has happened to Mercedes in a year – it could be any one of us, it’s so scary. I regularly get tested for bowel cancer because of my dad as it can be hereditary.
“It’s important for people to know what changes to look out for as it’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
● Hollyoaks drops three new episodes a week streaming on Channel 4, on E4 and on YouTube.
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Source: Celebrities - dailystar.co.uk
