Have I Got News for You (TV Program)

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    Late Night Addresses Your Election Eve Anxiety

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    “It feels like the whole country is waiting to get the results of a biopsy,” Jimmy Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Performance AnxietyThe late-night hosts seem to be as anxious about the election as you are.“It feels like the whole country is waiting to get the results of a biopsy,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Monday.“These polls — they’re mood rings. That’s all they are. They bring you up, they bring you down. Poll is short for ‘bipolar.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Tomorrow is Election Day and ‘Late Night’ is officially endorsing Xanax 0.5 milligram, twice a day as needed.” — SETH MEYERSOn “Real Time” on Friday, Bill Maher made one last appeal to undecided voters, or as he called them, “the Christmas Eve shoppers of politics — they know the big day is coming, but they just can’t get themselves to do anything about it until the last minute.”“The phrase I hear so much that makes me just want to un-alive myself is, ‘How’s she going to help me?’ Like the president is your personal genie. It’s Kamala, not ‘Kazam.’” — BILL MAHER“And so, dear Christmas Eve voter, I say to you: Things aren’t that bad, but they might get a hell of a lot worse under the rule of a mad king. Do I love everything about Kamala? No. Who told you you get to love everything? Do I wish she came up with a better reason to be president than ‘I’m not Trump’? Yeah, it would have been very helpful. But let’s not forget, ‘I’m not Trump’ is still a really great reason.” — BILL MAHER“But things look so good for Trump, Democrats have already impeached him.” — GREG GUTFELD“The Harris campaign is cautioning against getting too excited. Too late! I have to be excited because I’ve only got two other choices: absolute terror or Absolut vodka.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“If you see someone in the fetal position drenched in sweat, they either just ran the New York City Marathon or they’re waiting for tomorrow’s election.” — JIMMY FALLON“Look, I love this country. I’m an immigrant — I chose to be here. In the words of the late Lee Greenwood, I’m proud to be an American. And I’d argue there is nothing more American than having a healthy adversarial relationship with those in power, even if you voted for them.” — JOHN OLIVERWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Jon Stewart Fears Madison Square Garden Will Never Be the Same

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      After Donald Trump’s rally, Stewart showed an image of Billy Joel and asked, “How dare they desecrate the stage that the Piano Man has consecrated?”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘The Clueless Klux Klan’On Monday’s “Daily Show,” Jon Stewart showed a montage of speakers from the weekend’s Trump rally at Madison Square Garden, including those who called Kamala Harris the devil and the Antichrist and said she had “pimp handlers.” Tucker Carlson called her “Samoan-Malaysian-low-I.Q.” and issued a high-pitched cackle.“Now, generally, that’s a lineup that you see outside Madison Square Garden yelling at strangers as they try to get inside Madison Square Garden,” Stewart said.“And let me just say, how dare they desecrate the stage that the Piano Man has consecrated?” — JON STEWART, showing an image of Billy Joel“Former President Trump held a rally yesterday at Madison Square Garden in front of a crowd of 20,000 people, and it was the most vitriolic, rage-filled group of white people in that building since the last Rangers game.” — SETH MEYERS“Everyone was on the edge of their seat waiting for the Menendez brothers to come out.” — JIMMY FALLON“The Clueless Klux Klan showed up in force for what I think may have been the nuttiest Trump event of all time.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trump’s rally was described as unhinged, crude and racist — as opposed to the stable, polite and tolerant Trump rallies we’re accustomed to.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Hulkster Edition)“That is just sad, to see an old man like that. We’ve all had that moment, when you have to look at your grandpa and say, ‘Peepaw, it’s just not safe anymore. We’re going to have to take away the keys to your shirt.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT, after showing a clip of Hulk Hogan struggling to tear his shirt off at the Trump rally“You know you’re getting old when you lose a wrestling match to your tank top.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I warned him not to wear the Beefy T, but nobody listens.” — JIMMY KIMMELWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Politicians Get Roasted on This Beloved British Show. Can It Be a U.S. Hit?

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      “Have I Got News for You” will inject some levity into the CNN schedule. But on a news network, finding comedy in politics during an election year comes with risks.Weeks before Britain held an election this summer, around four million TV viewers tuned in to the season finale of “Have I Got News for You,” a long-running BBC panel show.For any lawmakers watching, it would have been uncomfortable viewing.That week’s host and four panelists made absurd jokes while answering questions about the news, first mocking the Conservative Party’s chances of winning the coming election, then poking fun at Keir Starmer, the leader of the opposition Labour Party, for constantly mentioning in speeches that his father was a toolmaker. (The comedian Jack Dee teased that Starmer’s father had made at least one tool: his son.)Filled with snarky humor, the episode was typical of a show that, since launching in 1990, has skewered Britain’s politicians — often to their faces. Lawmakers, including former Prime Minister Boris Johnson, have been regular guests.Now, in the middle of a different election cycle, CNN will on Saturday debut a U.S. version of “Have I Got News for You” — hosted by the comedian Roy Wood Jr. — in hopes that the network’s viewers have an appetite for something irreverent amid its serious news coverage.Roy Wood Jr. will host CNN’s version of “Have I Got News for You,” which debuts Saturday.John Nacion/Getty ImagesDespite the show’s popularity in Britain, CNN’s choice to premiere the satirical show during an election year comes with an obvious risk: If viewers perceive the jokes as favoring either the Democrat or Republican parties, it could damage the network’s attempts to position itself as the most centrist of the U.S. cable news networks — an effort that is already under attack from former President Donald Trump, who has repeatedly accused CNN of bias.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More