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      Jimmy Kimmel Ribs Republicans Over Ketanji Brown Jackson

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      Kimmel said Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearings could make the G.O.P.’s worst nightmare could come true: “Having this decided by two Black women whose names they can’t pronounce.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Subtle Racism Jamboree’Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearings kicked off in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee on Monday.Jimmy Kimmel joked that the hearings “give a number of our Republican senators a chance to compete in one of their favorite events: the subtle racism jamboree.”“She doesn’t need any Republican votes to get confirmed because the vice president is the tiebreaker, which would be — that would be the G.O.P.’s ultimate nightmare: having this decided by two Black women whose names they can’t pronounce.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I actually think they should treat Ketanji Brown Jackson exactly like they treated Brett Kavanaugh: Interview every single person who has accused her of sexual assault. Don’t stop, even though there are none. Do not stop.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (K.B.J. Edition)“Well, guys, today confirmation hearings began for Supreme Court nominee Ketanji Brown Jackson. The hearing process will last four days. It’s basically C-SPAN’s version of Coachella.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, Jackson will face days of tough questions. Brett Kavanaugh was like [imitating Kavanaugh slurring]: ‘It’ll be fine. I did it for four days after the second day, after the s — after the second day, it’s kind of a blur.’” — JIMMY FALLON“I saw that top Republican leading the hearings, Chuck Grassley, is 88 years old. Wow. When it was his turn to speak he was like, ‘Tell us who you are, and then tell me who I am.’” — JIMMY FALLON“But this is cool: I saw that Judge Jackson’s parents were at the confirmation hearing. Even crazier, so were Chuck Grassley’s.” — JIMMY FALLON“The next two days are for questions, and I think it’s going to be a huge missed opportunity if one of the judiciary committee members doesn’t start a question with ‘I’m sorry, Miss Jackson, ooh? I am for real — what is your judicial stance on federal financial oversight?’” — JAMES CORDEN, riffing on Outkast’s song, “Ms. Jackson”The Bits Worth WatchingJimmy Fallon and Questlove played a game of Charades with Leslie Mann and Mikey Day, the host of “Is It Cake?” on Monday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightJamie Lee Curtis will pop by Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutSharon Stone in the interrogation scene in “Basic Instinct,” which opened on March 20, 1992.Rialto PicturesThe erotic thriller “Basic Instinct” is still a hit 30 years after its highly contested premiere. More

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      Late Night Gapes at Biden’s Calling Putin a ‘War Criminal’

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      A Kremlin spokesman pointed the finger back at the U.S. for World War II bombings, and Trevor Noah joked, “Keep up with the times, yo!”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.New War, Who Dis?President Biden referred this week to Vladimir Putin, Russia’s leader, as a “war criminal,” and a Kremlin spokesman responded by saying the statement was unfair and hypocritical, citing the United States’ bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki during World War II.Trevor Noah criticized Russia for coming “with that old [expletive].”“Seriously, Russia, you’re gonna bring up something America did in the ’40s?” Noah said. “America has committed plenty of war crimes since then. Keep up with the times, yo!”“Russia said that was unforgivable, so today Biden called him a ‘murderous dictator’ and a ‘pure thug.’ Tomorrow he’s going to call him a ‘stupidhead’ and it might get really crazy.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Just because America committed war crimes doesn’t mean you have to, as well, Vladimir Putin, OK? I mean, what if all your friends jumped off a bridge — would you do it, too? No, seriously, would you? I’m just brainstorming ways to end this whole thing. I just want to know what you would do, you know?” — TREVOR NOAHThe Punchiest Punchlines (St. Patrick’s Day Edition)“It is St. Green Vomit Day, also known as St. Patrick’s Day, also known as the day on which the world’s reddest white people wear green.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yeah, it’s a great day to be Irish and a bad day to be an Uber driver.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, the parade here is the only event where Times Square Elmo feels like the chaperone.” — JIMMY FALLON“You can tell people were ready to let loose. On my way in, I heard a guy on the street ask where the bathrooms are, and another guy said, ‘It’s wherever you want it to be.’” — JIMMY FALLON“It was fun seeing everyone decked out in their St. Paddy’s Day clothes. Some people wore shirts that said, ‘Kiss me, I’m Irish. While the rest opted for the newer ‘Kiss me, rapid’s negative.’” — JIMMY FALLON“It’s funny, everything we know about St. Patrick’s Day is not true. St. Patrick was born in England, not Ireland. There are no snakes in Ireland to drive out. And that creep wearing the ‘Kiss me, I’m Irish’ T-shirt? Probably not Irish.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“In fact, the world’s first recorded St. Patrick’s Day parade took place in what is now St. Augustine, Florida, in 1601. At this parade, they drank green beer and ate green beef. They didn’t dye the beef — everything was just very moldy back then.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingOn Thursday’s “Tonight Show,” Billy Crystal joined Jimmy Fallon in impersonating celebrities in conversation through mouth cutouts on magazine covers.Also, Check This OutFrom left: Channing Tatum, Sandra Bullock and Daniel Radcliffe say they’re happy that “The Lost City” will be released in theaters but mainly are interested in entertaining audiences no matter the platform.Amy Harrity for The New York TimesSandra Bullock, Channing Tatum and Daniel Radcliffe, stars of “The Lost City,” discussed their new film and friendships, as well as some of their most iconic roles to date. More

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      Late Night Is Wowed by the Senate Actually Doing Something

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      “Various politicians have been trying to do this for years but they kept getting clock blocked,” Jimmy Kimmel said of the Sunshine Protection Act, which passed Tuesday in the Senate.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Time Stands StillOn Tuesday, the Senate unanimously passed legislation making daylight saving time permanent.Jimmy Kimmel said in his monologue that he was “especially proud to be an American today.”“We finally agreed on something,” he said. “An idea that every sane American can get behind: that the sun shall never again set at lunchtime on Christmas Day, and may God bless us, every one.”“I have to say, this is a day that I’ve been waiting for almost my whole adult life: Something finally happened.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The United States Senate today voted across party lines to make daylight saving time permanent, meaning we may never have to change the clock on the microwave again!” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Various politicians have been trying to do this for years but they kept getting clock blocked.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“When was the last time anything got a unanimous vote in the Senate? They couldn’t even agree unanimously to condemn Asian American hate crimes. Josh Hawley was like, ‘Let’s not rush into anything.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Senator Marco Rubio of Florida, a Republican, was the lead sponsor of the bill. He said there’s ‘strong science’ behind it that is now showing and making people aware of the harm that clock-switching has. Well, good for you, Marco. Wait until you find out about all the other things that have strong science behind them. You’re going to be amazed. It’s going to be big for you.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Sunshine Protection Act Edition)“Today the Senate unanimously passed a bill to make daylight saving time permanent. Oh yes! I don’t think people were this happy when Pfizer announced they had a vaccine.” — JIMMY FALLON“They’re calling it the Sunshine Protection Act, which is actually my favorite Maroon 5 album.” — JAMES CORDEN“Today everyone in the Senate was like, ‘What happens now? We’ve never passed a bill before — this is weird.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Meanwhile, every wall clock said, ‘But that’s the only time you ever touch me.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingAmber Ruffin addressed Naomi Osaka’s heckler on Tuesday’s “Late Night with Seth Meyers.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightQuinta Brunson, the creator and star of the ABC hit comedy “Abbott Elementary,” will appear on Wednesday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutJesse Williams is playing a superstar baseball player who comes out as gay in the Broadway revival of “Take Me Out.”Sabrina Santiago for The New York TimesThe “Grey’s Anatomy” star Jesse Williams is making his Broadway debut in the revival of the baseball musical “Take Me Out.” More

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      Trevor Noah Talks Tom Brady’s Un-Retirement

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      Noah joked that Brady’s leaving the N.F.L. was like Charlie Sheen’s leaving “Two and a Half Men”: “Yeah, there were still two and a half men but which men? Not men we cared about.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Don’t Call It a ComebackQuarterback Tom Brady retired from the N.F.L. in February, but surprised fans on Sunday when he announced he would return to play for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers next season.On Monday’s “Daily Show,” Trevor Noah joked that Brady had been going to Super Bowls for so long, “his first halftime show was a bunch of Gregorian monks chanting.”“So, yeah, it was big news when Tom Brady retired,” Noah said. “But you know what’s even bigger news than retiring? Un-retiring.”“I love it so much, because he is the most loved and the most hated athlete in the game. I love this guy. He is the main character. What’s the N.F.L. without Tom Brady, huh? Him leaving the N.F.L. is like when Charlie Sheen left ‘Two and a Half Men.’ Yeah, there were still two and a half men, but which men? Not men we cared about.” — TREVOR NOAH“So with this move, Tom Brady has officially, officially, officially confirmed himself as the greatest of all time, because you see, this move right here is what all the greatest do — they retire, and they come right back. Yeah, Michael Jordan did it. Jay-Z did it. And the greatest of all time, Jesus. Yeah, that guy retired from life for three days before he was like, ‘Nah, the game needs me.’” — TREVOR NOAH“Also some people are just not made for the retired life, especially Tom Brady. Think about it: For 22 years, he’s had men the size of little trucks trying to tackle him. That’s adrenaline. Yeah, can you imagine how boring his home life is right now. Even hiring his own commentators probably didn’t help.” — TREVOR NOAHThe Punchiest Punchlines (Un-Retiring Edition)“Tom Brady is like your friend who announces she’s quitting Instagram and then posts something three hours later.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I guess he realized that if he retired, there wouldn’t be anybody around to make sure Gronk doesn’t eat a gallon of tide pods.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“That’s right, Tom Brady is back, and once again he made history as the first person to ever move to Florida and un-retire.” — JIMMY FALLON“Brady’s retirement lasted 40 days. In other words, he pretty much gave up football for Lent.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, he was only retired for six weeks. His kids were like, ‘Is it something we said?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Of course, my dear friend Tom Brady’s not just returning for the love of the game. He’s also set to make $25 million next season, which is, coincidentally, what you’d have to pay me to go to Tampa.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Succession” star Brian Cox crossed over into “Euphoria” while on “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightKristen Stewart, star of the movie “Spencer,” will appear on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutDolly Parton sought to take herself out of contention for the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.Maria Alejandra Cardona/ReutersDolly Parton wishes to remove herself from nomination for the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, saying she doesn’t feel she has earned the right to be inducted. More

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      Stephen Colbert Grades Biden’s First State of the Union Address

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      “Many lawmakers wore the colors of the Ukrainian flag, blue and yellow,” Colbert said. “It’s a show of solidarity not seen since the last ‘Minions’ movie.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Not So Civil UnionStephen Colbert went live on Tuesday night after President Biden’s first State of the Union address.“And let me tell you, it was a roller-coaster ride of rip roaring reasonableness,” Colbert said of Biden’s speech.”A roller coaster ride of rip roaring reasonableness.”- @StephenAtHome on President Biden’s #StateOfTheUnion speech. #LateShowLIVE pic.twitter.com/axxKy2F1xq— The Late Show (@colbertlateshow) March 2, 2022
      “Keep in mind, a week ago, this was going to be a totally different speech. But when Ukraine was invaded, the world changed. Because right now, there is a dictator who thinks he can violently conquer a sovereign democracy, but Joe Biden beat him in the last election.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Many lawmakers wore the colors of the Ukrainian flag, blue and yellow. It’s a show of solidarity not seen since the last ‘Minions’ movie.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Not everyone was focused on the speech. Kevin McCarthy was there but busy looking at his phone. To be fair, today’s Wordle was pretty tricky.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Of course the minority leader in the House not paying attention looked disrespectful. But keep in mind, he might’ve been on Amazon shopping for a spine.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Four Horsemen Edition)“It was a tough speech. Biden said that even though the country is divided right now — right now, we all need to come together and agree that the ‘Sex and the City’ reboot wasn’t anywhere near what we hoped it would be.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yep, it was historic — 400 representatives, 100 senators and Size 96 font on the teleprompter.” — JIMMY FALLON“But the State of our Union is as strong as Kim and Kanye right now.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“That’s right, Biden was at the podium with Kamala Harris and Nancy Pelosi right behind him. Fox News was like, ‘Throw in Hillary and you’ve got all Four Horsemen.’” — JIMMY FALLON“During his speech, Biden introduced his new unity agenda. Unity agenda, yeah. And you can tell it worked because every single Republican ignored him.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Late Night” writers Amber Ruffin and Jenny Hagel struggled to get through their song praising the Supreme Court hopeful Ketanji Brown Jackson.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightZoë Kravitz will talk about playing Catwoman (Selina Kyle) in the new “Batman” film on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutIn her new memoir, Amy Bloom writes about helping her husband to end his life after a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s. More

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      Trevor Noah Reviews Putin’s Attempt at a Soviet Reunion

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      If bringing back the Soviet Union is Putin’s goal, the “Daily Show” host joked, long lines are a good start.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Like Old TimesTrevor Noah was off the air last week, so he dedicated Monday’s “Daily Show” to the current situation in Ukraine, referring to it as “the largest European conflict since World War II — or when Harry and Meghan left the royals.”“Because it’s always been Putin’s wet dream to reunite the Soviet Union, you know? Sort of the same way Disney wants to tie all of its franchises together. Yeah, now Mickey is fighting Thanos? That’s weird, but profitable.” — TREVOR NOAH“Well, damn, Putin’s goal was to bring back the glory days of the Soviet Union. People waiting hours in long lines is definitely a start.” — TREVOR NOAH“They’re cutting off banking, they’re arming their enemies, and on top of that, airlines are stopping flights to and from Russia, which in my opinion might be one of the worst things. Because I mean the best part about going to Russia is that you can fly out of Russia. Now they don’t even have that.” — TREVOR NOAH“Yes, the threat of nuclear annihilation may have increased; yes, we may be on the brink of World War III; and, yes, Europe is once again at the mercy of one power-hungry dictator, but on the bright side, when was the last time you thought about Covid, huh?” — TREVOR NOAHThe Punchiest Punchlines (Taking Sides Edition)“Even famously neutral Switzerland is taking action against Russia. Switzerland, the people who never take a side, are taking a side on this.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Switzerland has a knife out for Russia, and since it’s a Swiss knife, it comes with little scissors, a toothpick and a corkscrew.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The Swiss don’t get involved in war. They don’t get involved in alliances. My dad didn’t get involved in my life. I would ask him to hug me, and he’d tell me that his official policy was to stay neutral.” — TREVOR NOAH, whose father is Swiss-German“The Swiss president said, ‘Russia’s attack cannot be accepted regarding international law, this cannot be accepted politically, and this cannot be accepted morally.’ And these are the people who gave Hitler a safe deposit box, so.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“This is Switzerland, who may I remind you didn’t take a side when it came to Hitler, but they looked at Russia and said, ‘OK, you’ve gone too far.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“This is like the Dalai Lama grabbin’ a buck knife and an AK and screaming, ‘Kill ’em all! Let the Buddha sort ’em out.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Imagine being sanctioned by a country that has been neutral for hundreds of years. It would be like Tom Hanks telling a child to go [expletive] himself.” — JAMES CORDEN“They have frozen Russian assets and closed Swiss airspace, which is helpful. And now not only is Putin in hot water, he’s in hot chocolate too.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“So to recap, Russia has now lost the Taliban and the Swiss. The most and least violent people in the world are united against Russia right now.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Saturday Night Live” star Kate McKinnon faced off against Jimmy Fallon in a word game called “Hey Robot.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightSandra Oh will talk about the end of “Killing Eve” on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutHarvey Fierstein writes about his life and career in his new memoir, “I Was Better Last Night.” More

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      Late Night Gets Serious About Ukraine

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      Hosts did their best to bring levity to their shows on an otherwise somber day.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.What Is It Good For?Late night hosts got serious on Thursday discussing Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.Stephen Colbert called it “a dark day.”“Over the last five years, we’ve seen democracy repeatedly undermined, tragic, unprecedented firestorms, a global pandemic,” Colbert said. “Well this morning, Vladimir Putin looked at all of that and said, ‘Hold my vodka.’”James Corden forewent any attempt at jokes at the top of his show and delivered a somber monologue instead.“But today, if you are thinking about the news, there is really only one news story, and that news is so dark. That a war has begun, a sovereign country has been invaded, and all day today, and then tonight, and now as I sit here, I can’t — all I can think about is the innocent men and women and children in Ukraine who are terrified for their lives and I don’t know how to process it. Like, I don’t even know how to talk about this to my own children, let alone begin talking to you about it on television. And it’s weird, you know, like just because I wear a suit and I sit behind this desk, it doesn’t really mean anything. I am not nearly qualified enough to speak about these events. I’m not. And I don’t really want to make jokes about any other trivial news story that we found today, because I can’t shake the feeling of how utterly terrifying all of this is, and how scared the people of Ukraine must be feeling today; how scared everyone in Eastern Europe must be feeling today. And I’m sure I can’t fathom that this is happening in 2022 and the ramifications of this are monumental, and we should be under no illusion of how serious and sad the situation in Ukraine is. So, I don’t know what to say other than our thoughts are with every single person in Ukraine tonight.”— JAMES CORDEN“Amidst all this horror, it’s important to keep our eyes on the unhinged fascist lunatic,” Colbert said, referring to former president Donald Trump, who doubled down on his support of Putin.“You know, it’s hard to do a comedy show when there’s a war going on, but we are here while more than 6,000 miles away, women and children are fleeing Ukraine. Men aged 18 to 60 are required to stay and fight as Russian forces continue their unprovoked attack — an attack that has been received here in the United States, like, I don’t remember anything like this, in that some of us seem OK with it. You know, typically we would band together in a situation like this. We’d be united, but that was before the great divider chopped us in half.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Russian President Vladimir Putin declared war last night against Ukraine, and this is nice: Trump offered to host the after party.” — SETH MEYERS“So, if you were like most people, you were shocked and horrified. But if you were Donald Trump, apparently you were at Mar-a-Lago watching it with a bunch of Palm Beach plastic surgeons and their third wives and thinking, ‘You really got to hand it to Vladimir Putin.’” — SETH MEYERS“While Vladimir Putin is being condemned by leaders and ambassadors from every democratic country around the world, Donald Trump, our former president, was complimenting him and, of course, himself, while bombs were falling on a country that did nothing to provoke an invasion.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Then, as the invasion began, the ex-prez took to Russian state media — sorry, I misread that: Fox News.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It takes a special kind of a son of a [expletive] to see innocent people fleeing their homes and think, ‘How can I make this about me?’ But nobody does that better than Donald Trump.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Can you imagine if any other president behaved this way? This would be like if during World War II, Hoover came out and said, ‘Attaboy, Adolf. Sweet mustache. I love what you’re doing there.’” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Say ‘Aaaah!’ Edition)“As you know, Russia is now at war with Ukraine. It is a crazy world we’re living in. In fact, today President Biden asked the C.D.C. to find a new variant just to lighten the mood.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, Russian president Vladimir Putin has launched a full-scale invasion of Ukraine. I think Putin has lost his mind. Even Kim Jong-un was like, ‘You’re not actually supposed to do it.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, World War III, a global pandemic, the queen has Covid, rising inflation. Billy Joel’s already working on a remix of ‘We Didn’t Start the Fire.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Listen, I don’t know what’s going to happen, but one thing’s for sure: Putin should fire those peacekeepers. You had one job!” — STEPHEN COLBERT“This is the biggest ground war in Europe since World War II, and the whole world is in shock. That’s why today’s Wordle was ‘Aaaah!’” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingOn “The Tonight Show,” Jimmy Fallon, Questlove and Higgins tried to guess if an audience member was hiding a mustache under his mask.Also, Check This OutNaomi Watts in “The Desperate Hour,” directed by Phillip Noyce.Vertical EntertainmentNaomi Watts plays a mother whose morning jog becomes a nightmare in Phillip Noyce’s new thriller “The Desperate Hour.” More

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      Seth Meyers Considers Trump’s Putin Praise

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      Meyers joked that Trump “narrates Putin’s every move like he is Tony Romo calling the last drive of a playoff game.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Piling on the PraiseLate-night hosts couldn’t avoid talking about Russia again on Wednesday night, pointing out that Donald Trump had been praising Vladimir Putin during a recent interview with a right-wing radio show.Trump called Putin “savvy” and his political strategy “genius,” which Seth Meyers joked was “a pretty brilliant way to make Putin second-guess himself.”“The entire world is aghast and horrified. The only people who could possibly think this is a good move are those unemployed fringe weirdos who go on small radio shows.” — SETH MEYERS“Keep in mind Trump also used the words ‘savvy’ and ‘genius’ to describe McDonald’s Dollar Menu.” — JIMMY FALLON“So honestly, I’m not sure you want to be called a genius by the guy that clogged the White House toilet with classified documents.” — JIMMY FALLON“I haven’t seen a president cheer on the Russians this hard since the Cuban missile crisis when Eisenhower wore the T-shirt, ‘Khrushchev is a Zaddy!’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“And even when he was president, Trump was always so desperate to buddy up with Putin, even Putin couldn’t believe it. Trump was like those rookie defensive backs who would stop Tom Brady after the game for an autograph: ‘Hey, I know I’m on the other team but huge fan, don’t tell my coach.’” — SETH MEYERS“Putin always had that smile on his face when he was next to Trump like, ‘I can’t believe how easy this is.’” — SETH MEYERS“It’s just insane that Trump is still so desperate to praise a bloodthirsty tyrant like Putin every chance he gets. Trump narrates Putin’s every move like he is Tony Romo calling the last drive of a playoff game.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Best of the Rest Edition)“This year, the Oscars are planning to prerecord some awards before the ceremony and air them during the live broadcast. Even more insulting, before the awards are presented, the announcer will say, ‘And now, the categories nobody cares about.’” — JIMMY FALLON“The categories that will not get the usual live on-air treatment are documentary short, makeup, hairstyling, original score, production design, animated short, live action short, sound, and editing — although it does feel ironic for the editors to be cut out of the show.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“If they really want to shorten the broadcast, maybe just skip the part where someone explains what an actor is.” — JIMMY FALLON“But how could they do this? I mean, who could forget that magical moment in 1975 when Ronald Pierce and Melvin Metcalfe won best sound for ‘Earthquake’?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I think they should go even further: boil it down to best actor, best actress and best picture, and we can all get to sleep.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingTracee Ellis Ross took on Jimmy Fallon in a few founds of “Sing it Like” on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightPamela Adlon will talk about the final season of her FX show “Better Things” on “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutBeanie Feldstein, center, rehearsing “His Love Makes You Beautiful” with members of the cast.George Etheredge for The New York TimesBeanie Feldstein is prepared to take on the iconic Barbra Streisand role in Broadway’s long-awaited reboot of “Funny Girl.” More