The Daily Show with Trevor Noah (TV Program)

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      Late Night Has Some Ideas on Who Set the Fox Christmas Tree Ablaze

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      “The fire is believed to have started after Fox News’ pants caught on fire,” Jimmy Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.We Didn’t Start the FireA 50-foot tree in front of Fox News’s New York City headquarters was set on fire early Wednesday.“The fire is believed to have started after Fox News’ pants caught on fire,” Jimmy Kimmel joked.“The fire is believed to have started because Judge Jeanine Pirro ate one too many rum balls and breathed on a cigarette.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I’ve seen trees — this is not one of them. That is a hollow structure that sort of resembles a tree, in the same way Tucker Carlson is a hollow structure that sort of resembles a human.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“And Fox News tried to warn us this was coming. Every time a store clerk says, ‘Happy holidays,’ a Christmas tree bursts into flames.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Authorities arrested a suspect last night, and police say that they believe he is homeless and mental illness may have played a factor. Homeless and mentally ill? Oh, my God — the fire was set by Bill O’Reilly!” — STEPHEN COLBERT“[To the tune of ‘It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas’] It’s beginning to look a lot like arson, everywhere you go. Take a look at the tree and then, the flames are roaring once again. Doocy, stop, drop, roll.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Fired Up Edition)“Even though lighting trees on fire is very much in line with Fox’s position on climate change, the hosts of their morning show were very upset today.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“And it is not clear how this happened. It could be an accident. It could be arson. It could be Santifa.” — TREVOR NOAH“Now, I know what you’re thinking, but the ghost of Hugo Chavez has an alibi.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Of course, this never would have happened if the tree had a gun.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingSamantha Bee got a tattoo to commemorate her 200th episode of “Full Frontal.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightMichael B. Jordan will sit down with Stephen Colbert on Thursday’s “Late Night.”Also, Check This OutAlexa VisciusThe “Hacks” star Meg Stalter loves Dolly Parton, Instagram Live and private karaoke. More

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      Late Night: Putin and Biden’s Call Could Have Been an Email

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      The two-hour video call was a hot topic on late night Tuesday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Two Old Men on a Zoom’President Biden and President Vladimir V. Putin spoke in a video call on Tuesday, discussing the potential Russian invasion of Ukraine.“Makes sense — the only way to resolve a delicate situation that requires crystal-clear communication is two old men on a Zoom,” Stephen Colbert joked on Tuesday night. “We do not know the results of this call yet, but Biden made it clear that if Russia invades, the U.S. and our allies would respond with strong economic and other measures. I know we’re trying to avoid a hot war here, but those are some pretty vague threats. ‘Son, if you throw a party when your mother and I are out of town, we will respond with strong reactions and emotions, t.b.d.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Today, President Biden held a big one-on-one video call with Russian President Vladimir Putin that lasted two hours. And like most two-hour meetings over Zoom, Putin was like, [imitating Putin] ‘This could have been email.’” — JIMMY FALLON“This morning, President Biden had a video call with Russian President Vladimir Putin and warned him if Russia were to invade Ukraine, Putin would feel, quote ‘economic pain.’ I like that Biden is talking like a professional wrestler from the ’80s.” — JAMES CORDENThe Punchiest Punchlines (Tuesdays With Vladimir Edition)“President Biden held a virtual meeting today with Russian President Vladimir Putin, though it was weird that they decided to do it in the metaverse.” — SETH MEYERS“Zoom meetings with Putin are interesting. Some people go without pants, Putin just goes without a shirt. Space background, too.” — JIMMY FALLON“And a video chat is a tough way for both these guys to do diplomacy. I mean, especially because even when he’s in person, Biden talks like he’s got a bad connection.” — TREVOR NOAH“On the bright side, it was the first time Putin could see Biden on camera when Biden actually knew he was on camera.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingJ.B. Smoove, guest host of “Jimmy Kimmel Live,” demanded the two Black audience members move up to the front during his monologue.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightMariah Carey, queen of Christmas, will pop by Wednesday’s “Late Late Show.”Also, Check This OutBenedict Cumberbatch in “The Power of the Dog,” left, Kristen Stewart in “Spencer” and Ariana DeBose in “West Side Story.”From left: Kirsty Griffin/Netflix; Pablo Larrain/Neon; Niko Tavernise/20th Century Studios“Summer of Soul,” “The Power of the Dog” and “West Side Story” are among the best films of 2021. More

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      Trevor Noah Says Omicron Might Not Be So Bad

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      Noah said that new strains are like streaming new TV shows: “You gotta stick with it the first couple of weeks and see where it goes.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Next Week on OmicronThe first Covid cases with the new Omicron strain have been reported in the United States.Trevor Noah encouraged viewers not to freak out just yet, saying, “We have no idea if Omicron is actually that bad.”“And what I mean by that is, we don’t know if it might spread more easily or we don’t know if it will be more deadly. It’s just too early to know. And I hate to sound like someone describing every streaming show right now, but you gotta stick with it the first couple of weeks and see where it goes.” — TREVOR NOAH“Yesterday, we learned the first Omicron case on U.S. soil was found in California, which led the state’s secretary of health and human services to claim Californians were proud to have identified the first Omicron case. Good for you, Golden State. You put that kind of positive spin on all your disasters: ‘Greetings from California, home of extra-crispy trees.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Unfortunately, that’s not the only case. Today, a second case of the Omicron variant was identified in Minnesota. But do not panic — it’s just one person in America’s heartland, who recently traveled to New York City. OK, OK fine but maybe he was here on business, spent most of his time alone in his hotel getting takeout and staring pensively out the window at all the people he wasn’t infecting — right after he attended the 2021 anime convention at the Javits Center.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“That’s right, one of the first U.S. cases of the new Covid variant may be an adult man who attended an anime convention. I mean, which is good. At least we know that it’s not transmitted via eye contact.” — TREVOR NOAH“But people, please remember this, please remember this, we shouldn’t be surprised when we find more and more cases, OK? Because Omicron is like those microscopic bugs that live in your eyelashes: Even if you don’t see them, you know that they’re there. Yeah, laughing at you about all the spiders that crawl into your mouth while you sleep.” — TREVOR NOAHThe Punchiest Punchlines (Getting Lit Edition)“Well, guys, tonight in Washington, D.C., President Biden attended the 99th annual national Christmas tree lighting. Meanwhile, the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree was like, ‘Uh, yeah, sure, that’s the national Christmas tree.’” — JIMMY FALLON“The event was hosted by LL Cool J. Originally Snoop was supposed to host, but he canceled once he found out it wasn’t the kind of tree lighting he was used to.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“And this was special — a real-life Elf on the Shelf made an appearance. Yeah, he got up and said, ‘For the last time, my name is Pete Buttigieg.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Then organizers said, ‘Sorry, here’s the real Elf on the Shelf,’ and then he got up and said, ‘I’m sorry, for the last time, my name is Dr. Fauci.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingTracy Morgan talks about why he’s going back onstage on Thursday’s “Desus & Mero.”Also, Check This OutRebecca ClarkeBette Midler shared her love of classics like “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” and Charles Dickens, among others, in this week’s By the Book. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel: Trump’s Covid Test Is the Only Positive Thing He’s Done

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      Late-night hosts weighed in on Donald Trump’s initial results just three days before his debate with Joe Biden.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.On Whose Honor?In his new book, Mark Meadows, former President Donald Trump’s chief of staff, wrote that Trump tested positive for the coronavirus before his first debate with Joe Biden in 2020.“Sadly, testing positive for Covid was the only positive thing he did in four years as president,” Jimmy Kimmel joked on Wednesday night.Mark Meadows, left, has written a book about his time in the White House, where he served as chief of staff of Donald Trump when he was president.Al Drago/Reuters“Meadows wrote that when he informed Trump he’d tested positive, Trump replied, ‘Oh, [expletive], you gotta be [expletive] kidding me,’ which is what most of us said when he was elected president.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Fox should not have let him debate. Joe Biden is 143 years old. The debate moderator, Chris Wallace, is no spring chicken, either. He said they were relying on the honor system, which, you’re relying on the honor system with Donald Trump? You might as well rely on the Dewey decimal system.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The honor system? How can you rely on the honor system when you know he doesn’t have any? That’s like meeting with Vladimir Putin and relying on the shirt system.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Have you met Donald Trump? ‘Do you promise you’re negative, guy who ran a fake university?’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“You can’t go wrong when you bet on the former president lying. It’s just one of those certainties in life — and him not paying taxes.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“And if you do the math on the Covid, it means Trump had it at that little soiree he threw for Judge Amy Coney Barrett, after which at least eight people who were there tested positive. I wonder who they got it from? I wonder whose tiny hand they all shook at that party?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I’m not saying that Trump was trying to assassinate Joe Biden, but he definitely wasn’t going out of his way to avoid it.” — TREVOR NOAH“That explains why Trump originally wanted to end the Biden debate with a long, drawn-out kiss.” — JAMES CORDEN“Trump participated in the debate despite testing positive. Or, as Fox News is spinning it, ‘President Trump battled on heroically, and graciously shared his exclusive strain of Covid with a stage full of ungrateful libs.’” — JAMES CORDENThe Punchiest Punchlines (Signing Off Edition)“CNN has suspended Chris Cuomo indefinitely for his role in advising his brother, Andrew Cuomo, during his recent scandal. Yeah, Chris Cuomo knew something was up when CNN added a suspension countdown clock.” — JIMMY FALLON“On the one hand, this is a story about a guy helping his brother in a time of crisis. And, I mean, who wouldn’t do that for their brother? Because you’ve got to remember, brother is the top level of male relationship. Yeah, it goes brother, my dude, homey, this guy and stepdad.” — TREVOR NOAH“Of course, it does matter and it does make a difference how you help your brother and what you’re helping him with. Like, if your brother murdered somebody, you can either help him get the best lawyer in the country, or you can help him bury the body. I mean, both make you a good brother, but one makes you an accessory after the fact.” — TREVOR NOAH“And, people, that’s not what CNN is about. CNN is about sitting 12 people together at a desk and having them yell at each other about whether Adele’s Las Vegas residency is going to hurt Biden’s poll numbers or not.” — TREVOR NOAHThe Bits Worth WatchingThis week’s “Tonight Show” hashtags featured viewers’ travel fails.What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightMahershala Ali (a.k.a. Marvel’s new Blade) will chat with Stephen Colbert on Thursday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutMel Brooks in “High Anxiety,” 1977.Jim Palmer/Associated PressMel Brooks keeps things light in his new memoir, “All About Me!” More

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      Late Night Doesn’t Feel Great About Omicron

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      Moderna’s chief executive said scientists anticipate Omicron is “not going to be good.” Stephen Colbert called the sentiment “not comforting.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Outlook Not So GoodIn a recent interview, the C.E.O. of Moderna said scientists he’s spoken to about the new Covid variant, Omicron, agree “it’s not going to be good.”“Like, not comforting, science. Reminds me of that famous sugar-free gum slogan: ‘Four out of five dentists agree: What’s the point of chewing gum? Death comes for us all,’” Stephen Colbert said.“It’s kind of like when the trailer for the movie ‘Cats’ came out — the only thing we knew was ‘Well, it’s not going to be good.’ But we didn’t know the extent of how not good it would be.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“But no one knows for sure, so both Pfizer and Moderna are testing how well their vaccines protect against Omicron. Unfortunately, they won’t know the results for two weeks, at the earliest. Evidently, the scientists are stuck in a container off the coast of China.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Now look, I’m not saying the C.E.O. of Moderna is lying — I’m not saying that at all. I’m just saying I don’t think he’s the most objective source on this topic. I’ll wait to hear what neutral experts say about a new vaccine. People like public health officials, or the C.E.O. of Johnson & Johnson. I mean, he’s got nothing to gain ’cause nobody’s going to buy his vaccines either way, so I trust him.” — TREVOR NOAH“And I wish they would hurry up, because I need to know what I’m doing in two weeks from now, you know? Should I be buying my ‘Spider-Man’ tickets or learning how to hunt and cook wild animals? Or should I split the difference and buy ‘Spider-Man’ tickets for the wild animals?” — TREVOR NOAHThe Punchiest Punchlines (Working on It Edition)“Following the news on the Omicron variant, the C.D.C. is now saying that all adults should get a booster shot. Right now, Instagram is like, ‘Incoming booster selfies in three, two, one.’” — JIMMY FALLON“And now for the bad news: Omicron does appear to be evading vaccines. It’s a scientific phenomenon known as Aaron Rodgers.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Well, guys, Pfizer and Moderna both say that they’re already working on vaccines for the Omicron variant, while Johnson & Johnson is cheering them on.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, Johnson & Johnson is like, ‘Guys, I thought we promised we’re not doing vaccines this year — why would you embarrass me?’” — JIMMY FALLON“How’d they start working on this so fast, too? It’s like when a team wins the Super Bowl, and the first commercial is, ‘Buy your Buccaneers championship hat now!’” — JIMMY FALLON“And also if we do need a new vaccine for this new variant, it’s not a big deal, all right, people? I see people online being like, ‘We’re gonna get a new shot every year?’ Yeah, you know what? Maybe to not die you need to take 15 minutes out of your year. What, is your life so busy that you don’t have time for that? I guarantee you, at some point in the next year, you will walk by a CVS. Unless you live in the desert — then it’s gonna be like a five-minute walk to a CVS.” — TREVOR NOAHThe Bits Worth WatchingJimmy Kimmel defended Dr. Fauci in his Tuesday night monologue.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightCate Blanchett will appear on Wednesday’s “Late Show” to talk about her new film, “Nightmare Alley.”Also, Check This OutLady Gaga as Patrizia Reggiani in “House of Gucci.”Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures Inc. The Guccis aren’t happy about the family portrayal in “House of Gucci.” More

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      Trevor Noah: ‘Covid Turned the Planet Into a Frat House’

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      The latest Covid variant, Omicron, follows Alpha, Lambda and Delta in the Greek alphabet.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Covid’s Greatest HitsTrevor Noah dug into the new Covid variant on Monday night, touching on Omicron’s disturbingly high number of mutations, which make it potentially more dangerous than the others.“Yes, it’s all the greatest hits in one place, like if ‘Mamma Mia’ killed you instead of teaching you about the power of love,” Noah joked on Monday night.“For most of 2021, the world has been fighting the various Covid variants, which are more than the OG from Wuhan. We had Alpha, we had Lambda, we had Delta — Covid basically turned the planet into the [expletive] frat house of all time.” — TREVOR NOAH“I mean, how did that happen after everything we did? I mean, for two years now, people, we wore masks for some of the time, we social distanced when it was convenient, then like half of us got vaccinated — what more is it gonna take?” — TREVOR NOAH“And it could be that all of these mutations that sound so scary turn out to be not that big a deal, you know? Like when Apple acts like it is making tons of changes to the iPhone and we’re like, ‘I need a new iPhone! I need a new iPhone!’ and you get it and you’re like, ‘Wait — it’s just a slightly different camera? I killed a man in line for this thing!’” — TREVOR NOAHThe Punchiest Punchlines (Omicron Edition)“Omicron — it sounds like a Transformer who can’t smell or taste.” — JIMMY FALLON“Experts are hoping it ends up being like the second season of ‘Tiger King’ where everybody talks about it, but nobody actually experiences it.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trying to guess where it will strike next is fun. It’s like, ‘Where in the world is Covid San Diego’?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yeah, we need another variant like we another turkey sandwich for lunch.” — JIMMY FALLON“But the White House said it would take two weeks to have definitive data on the new strain. That’s right, even our Covid information has shipping delays. Unbelievable!” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingStephen Colbert demands more Hanukkah-themed holiday films like “A Whole Latke Love.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightMaya Rudolph will surely get roped into something fun with her pal Jimmy Fallon on Tuesday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutDo you hear what they hear? The cabaret duo Justin Vivian Bond (Kiki), left, and Kenny Mellman (Herb), are performing their first holiday show together in 14 years.Eric McNattAfter 14 years, Justin Vivian Bond and Kenny Mellman are resurrecting Kiki and Herb for Christmas. More

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      Late Night Celebrates the QAnon Shaman’s 41-Month Prison Sentence

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      “That’s nearly three and a half years, so with good behavior, he could be out in time to storm the Capitol in 2024,” Stephen Colbert joked on Wednesday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.ShamanticsJacob Chansley, better known as the QAnon Shaman, was sentenced to 41 months for his role in the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol.“That’s nearly three and a half years, so with good behavior, he could be out in time to storm the Capitol in 2024,” Stephen Colbert joked on Wednesday night.“He apologized for storming the Capitol and said he often looks in the mirror and tells himself, ‘You really messed up, royally.’ Maybe if he’d taken a look in the mirror sooner, he would have noticed he had a dead raccoon on his head.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Not only did Chansley commit the crime of looking like an idiot — he is one.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Right now, he’s trying to use an antler to lift the keys off a guard’s belt.” — JIMMY FALLON“Apparently, it’s hard to find a jury of his peers the same day there’s a Renaissance fair.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Crypto Edition)“Starting Christmas Day, Staples Center will be known as Crypto.com Arena, which doesn’t sound creepy at all.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Crypto, the most confusing thing a venue has been named since Houston’s The Plot of ‘Inception’ Stadium.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“But a lot of people around here don’t like the new name at all. You know you’re in a weird spot when fans are like, ‘We have to go back to when it was named after an office supply chain!’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“It’s a bad name, but thankfully, Crypto.com still isn’t the worst-named arena in sports. That honor belongs to the New Orleans Pelicans’ Smoothie King Center.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“So, look for the Lakers to be up by 20, then back down by 40, then up by 10,000, then back to zero.” — SETH MEYERS“Generations of fans have grown up with the Staples Center. For my younger viewers, that name refers to the Staples office supply company. An office is something you used to go to for meetings, which are like very boring in-person emails. Oh, emails are long texts with more words, and words are faceless emojis that remind you you’re a relic of the past and the future no longer belongs to you. Go Cryptos!” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It’s not like Staples is a sacred name from the ancestors — it’s a store where you buy 50 packs of binders even though you only need one.” — TREVOR NOAH“True story, we almost called our youngest daughter Crypto.com. Crypto.com Corden. Crypto.com Jennifer Corden.” — JAMES CORDENThe Bits Worth WatchingDulcé Sloan looked into the history of historically Black college and university marching bands on Wednesday’s “The Daily Show.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightHalle Berry will appear on Thursday’s “Daily Show” to promote her new film, “Bruised.”Also, Check This OutAdele’s “30,” due Friday, is the follow-up to her blockbuster “25,” an album that sold nearly 3.4 million copies in a single week in the United States. Getty ImagesAdele’s first new album in six years faces a changing music industry, but she’s always been an exception to the rule. More

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      Late Night Shares Juicy Passages From 'Betrayal'

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      Stephen Colbert and Seth Meyers reported some of the most interesting items from Jonathan Karl’s new book.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Best of ‘Betrayal’Jonathan Karl’s “Betrayal” was published on Tuesday, and late night shared a few of that book’s juicier items regarding former President Trump and Jan. 6, including some tidbits about Michael Flynn and his call for the military to stop Joe Biden from taking office.“Remember, this was a former general making a call to the military demanding they support a fascist coup. What is wrong with him? It’s 2021 — just text!” — STEPHEN COLBERT“According to a new book, former Acting Defense Secretary Christopher Miller purposely offered, then presented, Trump extreme military scenarios in the final week of his presidency to prevent him from choosing to attack Iran. Unfortunately, he opted for the craziest one — attacking the U.S.” — SETH MEYERS“After the election, [Sidney] Powell contacted a Pentagon official to push the claim that the C.I.A. director had been hurt and taken into custody in Germany while ‘on a secret mission to destroy evidence of voter fraud on a computer server that belonged to a company named Scytl.’ Where did Powell get this urgent news? From a false conspiracy theory that had been gaining steam among QAnon followers. Oh, yeah, that theory is definitely steaming.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Antique Roadshow Edition)“Yesterday, President Biden signed his bipartisan infrastructure bill into law, and to tell everyone about it today, he kicked off a road show to showcase the benefits of the bill. It’s like ‘The Antiques Road Show’ if the road was the antique.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“And, guys, why do they have to sign the bill in public? I mean, I know this is important legislation, but as a spectator sport, it’s pretty boring. Where’s the drama? ‘Ooh, maybe the pen will run out of ink!’” — TREVOR NOAH“Also, why are they even having a bill-signing celebration? Passing laws is their job. Nobody else gets to do that at their job. Like, after you make photocopies for your boss at the office, you don’t get to pose for pictures while shaking hands: [imitating boss] ‘I didn’t think you could get it double-sided. Well done, Billy, well done.’” — TREVOR NOAH“During the signing ceremony yesterday for the bipartisan infrastructure bill, President Biden twice referred to Arizona Senator Kyrsten Sinema as ‘Kristen.’ And that’s the worst thing you can call her besides a Democrat — she hates that.” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth WatchingJimmy Fallon showed off pets that pack suitcases and chug beers better than he can.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightAdam Driver, a “House of Gucci” star, will appear on Wednesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutLisa Law/Apple TV+ Todd Haynes’s “The Velvet Underground” is a deep dive on the New York demimonde that birthed the band, and also a reflection on the cinema and art of the day. More