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      Late Night Calls Out Violence Against Trump

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      “Not only is it morally wrong, but you’re also just giving him more things to brag about,” Ronny Chieng said on Tuesday’s “Daily Show.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘In His Natural Habitat’Late night returned in full on Tuesday, with a focus on what officials believe was a second assassination attempt on former President Donald Trump.“Yes, this weekend, a crazy person tried to hunt Donald Trump in his natural habitat, his golf course,” Ronny Chieng said on Tuesday’s “Daily Show.”“Now here’s how this craziness went down: A truly deranged man went to Mar-a-Lago’s golf course and spent nearly 12 hours hiding there before a Secret Service agent spotted his rifle sticking through the shrubbery. That sounds like an evil plot straight out of Looney Tunes.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Yo, again? Will you people stop trying to assassinate Donald Trump? Not only is it morally wrong, but you’re also just giving him more things to brag about: ‘They only tried to kill Abraham Lincoln once; that makes me twice as great as him.’” — RONNY CHIENG“Given that Trump’s campaign hadn’t announced any public plans for Sunday, many wondered did the suspect know the former president would be coming to play golf or was it a guess? Yes, how could he possibly have guessed that Trump would be golfing?” — STEPHEN COLBERT“This guy managed to walk into Trump’s golf course and stay there undetected for 12 hours, OK? And I don’t know if you’ve thought about this, Trump, but maybe you should consider building, like, a wall?” — RONNY CHIENG“By the way, have you noticed that the news reports are all like ‘a harrowing near tragedy sending chills through our nation!’ and meanwhile, everyone you actually know is like, ‘Oh, yeah, yeah, I saw that, yeah.’ I mean, we have to act like it’s a big deal, but it doesn’t really have the same impact of the first one, you know? It’s kind of like ‘Black Panther 2.’ You’re like, ‘Yeah, I guess I’ll see it.’” — RONNY CHIENGThe Punchiest Punchlines (Swift Social Edition)“In a post to Truth Social over the weekend, former President Trump said, ‘I hate Taylor Swift!’ Sounds like he’s making a strong play for the 9-year-old brother vote.” — SETH MEYERS“Donald tweeting ‘I hate Taylor Swift?’ That’s dangerous. I mean, I would rather buy one of those Hezbollah pagers than tweet ‘I hate Taylor Swift.’” — RONNY CHIENG“I think Trump needs to stick to racism — it’s less divisive.” — RONNY CHIENG“But the assassin this weekend was probably not a Swiftie, OK? He doesn’t fit the M.O. Swifties are nonviolent — they prefer to cyberbully you until you kill yourself.” — RONNY CHIENGThe Bits Worth WatchingWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Late Night Enjoys Biden’s Encounter With a Trump Fan

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      When President Biden briefly donned a Trump hat, he “gave everyone in QAnon a brain aneurysm at once,” Jimmy Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Hats OffDuring a Wednesday event honoring emergency medical workers from Sept. 11, President Biden shared a lighthearted encounter with a Donald Trump supporter, playfully placing the man’s Trump hat on his own head.“And a new comedy team was born,” Jimmy Kimmel joked on Thursday.“When he put that hat — that Trump hat on his head, he gave everyone in QAnon a brain aneurysm at once.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“That’s sort of a nice moment: two old men from opposite sides, coming together to share a laugh while neither of them run for president.” — JORDAN KLEPPER“I will tell you what, if you ask me, this is what you want from the president of the United States when he meets a voter on the other side. He doesn’t get mad at him, he doesn’t try to hard-sell him, he just shows warmth and a bit of empathy. And they did a remarkable thing you don’t see among two people on opposite sides these days: They had a laugh. And with a simple exchange of hats, they are able to share something much more meaningful: lice. Itchy, disgusting, impossible-to-get-rid-of lice. And that warms my dead heart.” — JORDAN KLEPPER“[imitating Biden] Hey, you take that, Jack. I might not be the best debater, but I can still zing you with the old hat chat.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“But isn’t it nice to see Biden fooling around? Every time I see him now, it’s like when you go on vacation, and the doggy day care texts you a picture of your golden retriever playing fetch. You’re like, ‘Oh, look at that, he’s having fun.’” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Bad Blood Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Chides Trump for His Debate Performance

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      “More than 67 million Americans watched the debate on television last night, and of that 67 million, the only one who seems to think Trump did a good job is Donald Trump,” Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.67 Million to 1Despite public sentiment suggesting otherwise, Donald Trump said he came out on top after Tuesday’s debate, while also asserting it was rigged against him.On Wednesday, Jimmy Kimmel said that more than 67 million Americans watched the debate on television last night — “and of that 67 million, the only one who seems to think Trump did a good job is Donald Trump.”“I had a liberal elite day today. I woke up, I ate a big cat for breakfast, then I had a baby, then I had an abortion right after that, and then I went to pick up my kids from their mandatory transgender surgery operations after school. And now, I’m back here spreading Marxist propaganda on TV. That’s how we do it.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“This morning, Trump said the debate was rigged and that ABC should be shut down for fact-checking him, but that he still thought he did great. Then ABC fact-checked him again and said, ‘You did not.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, everyone thought Harris seemed really prepared while Trump was like, ‘My homework was eaten by a dog that was eaten by people in Ohio.’” — JIMMY FALLON“This pet-eating brain worm got into Trump’s skull through JD Vance, who’s been spreading a racist rumor that Haitian immigrants are abducting people’s pets and eating them in Ohio. This is a good time to remind you: please remember to spay or neuter your JD Vance. We don’t want more of that.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It looks like Operation ‘I’m Not Weird’ isn’t going well.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Childless Cat Lady Edition)“Last night, Kamala Harris and Donald Trump took to the debate stage to make their cases to Taylor Alison Swift and whoever else happened to be watching.” — JORDAN KLEPPER“Trump was like, ‘See? She’s eating her cat.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump this morning responded to the Taylor Swift endorsement and said, ‘Not a fan.’ But I have some bad news: his granddaughter, Arabella, Ivanka’s daughter, two months ago had a Taylor Swift cake for her birthday. So eat that, Grandpa.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Really, Donald? You prefer Brittany Mahomes? What’s your top five Brittany Mahomes songs? Is this really his angle? ‘Well, I don’t care, Taylor, because I like your boyfriend’s co-worker’s wife better.” — JORDAN KLEPPERThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Late Night” writers Amber Ruffin and Jenny Hagel returned for another “Jokes Seth Can’t Tell” segment on Wednesday.What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightThe “Agatha All Along” star Sasheer Zamata will appear on Thursday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutThe documentary “Brandy Hellville & The Cult of Fast Fashion,” streaming on Max, turns a sharp eye to the Gen Z fashion brand Brandy Melville.Courtesy of HBOTrue crime stories about brands like Brandy Melville and Lululemon explore the dark side of trendy clothing. More

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      Late Night Hosts Declare Harris the Winner in the Debate

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      Stephen Colbert said that the vice president needed to “rattle Trump’s cage. And now that it is over, they are still looking for pieces of his cage in low orbit.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Best in ShowOn Tuesday, Vice President Kamala Harris and former President Donald Trump met for their only scheduled debate before the election. Three of the five late-night shows went live after it ended, with Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Kimmel and Jon Stewart offering their takes.Colbert said that Harris “came out swinging,” looking to “rattle Trump’s cage.”“And now that it is over, they are still looking for pieces of his cage in low orbit.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Harris got under his skin like she was stuffing in butter and rosemary. It was beautiful. By the end of the debate, the meat was falling off the bone.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Usually when Donald Trump gets a spanking like this from a woman, it’s with a Forbes magazine. Kamala was pushing his buttons like a 12-year-old playing Fortnite.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“He was so nonsensical that she looked at him the way a parent looks at a kid giving a presentation on why they should be allowed to get a pet tiger.” — STEPHEN COLBERTOn “The Daily Show,” Jon Stewart called out Trump for his answer to a question about his involvement in the Jan. 6. insurrection.“You spent two months riling up your base that our country had literally been stolen from them through fraudulent means, that you could never even get a whiff of in a court of law, and let — let yourself just abuse them. You pressed on. You abused their trust. You showed up for a speech? You [expletive] tweeted ‘Join me on Jan. 6. It will be wild.’ But suddenly now: ‘I was just a hired magician to do the bar mitzvah! I didn’t do anything. I showed up with a hat and a rabbit and then the whole party went out of control!’” — JON STEWART“And this is it, ladies and gentlemen. I don’t know if this debate is going to change anything. I really don’t. People are awfully set in the manner that they view these proceedings. What I think is a home-run answer for one candidate, someone else views as a dodge or a lie or any of those other things. In some ways, it doesn’t matter what they say anymore, but one thing will always be true, and it is the quality of the former president I respect the least: Whenever he is cornered and forced to face even the smallest of consequences for his own mendacity and scheming, he reverts to the greatest refuge of scoundrels. As Shaggy would say, ‘It wasn’t me!’” — JON STEWART“[imitating Trump] OK, but you can’t believe a thing I say. I’m crazy! Everybody knows that! I’m the Hannibal Lecter whale guy. Immigrants are taking our cats and giving them operations to turn them into dogs and then eating the dogs. Whale!” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Lock Up Your Dogs Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Jon Stewart Goes Live From Chicago on the Last Night of the D.N.C.

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      After Kamala Harris accepted the nomination, Stewart mused: “How funny would it have been if at the end she was like, ‘But seriously, though: not for me.’”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Kamala FTWVice President Kamala Harris accepted her party’s presidential nomination on Day 4 of the Democratic National Convention on Thursday.Jon Stewart called it “Kamala’s Night” on “The Daily Show,” saying, “How funny would it have been if at the end she was like, ‘But seriously, though: not for me. This has all been great, but I’ve been thinking it over.’”“Kamala Harris’s speech was everything we’ve been waiting for all week. She hit her opponent on his policy failures. She hit him on his dereliction of duty. She hit him on his lies, his treason and his crimes and his crimes and his crimes. She is a prosecutor in the trial of Donald J. Trump. He is guilty as charged and now it is time to sentence him to four to eight years of President Harris.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“But credit where credit is due: the Democrats, on short notice, exploited their newfound momentum and enthusiasm with a display of the breadth and width of this diverse, often contradictory party of Roosevelt. At their convention, they had union leaders and C.E.O.s. They had Democratic Party icons and lifelong Republicans. They had a guy yelling, ‘Screw the billionaires!’ followed immediately by a very happy billionaire. [imitating a Democrat:] ‘It’s all OK if it’s our billionaire. I don’t like billionaires, but he’s all right.’” — JON STEWART, referring to Bernie Sanders and Gov. JB Pritzker“Listen to me: Whatever you’re feeling, go with it. Whether that feeling is joy or perhaps relief at having a chance when you had none is exhilarating.” — JON STEWARTThe Punchiest Punchlines (What a Difference a Month Can Make Edition)“A lot can change in a month. Right now, Kamala’s campaign headquarters are buzzing, while Biden’s have been turned into a Spirit Halloween.” — JIMMY FALLON“Meanwhile, last night, Tim Walz officially accepted the nomination to be vice president. Now, a month ago, nobody knew Tim Walz, and now he’s famous. Even the Hawk Tuah Girl was like, ‘Damn, that was quick.’” — JIMMY FALLON“In his speech last night at the Democratic National Convention, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz told the crowd, ‘Never underestimate a public-school teacher.’ He’s right. My mother is a public-school teacher, and she can drink way more than you’d think.” — SETH MEYERS“In one month, they have raised around $500 million. Congratulations, Democrats, you can stop texting now.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingPop star Sabrina Carpenter performed her hit “Please Please Please” on Thursday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutCash Cobain, 26, has released six projects since 2021, including his breakthrough mixtape, “2 Slizzy 2 Sexy.”Andre D. Wagner for The New York TimesThe breakout rapper and producer Cash Cobain is a central figure of “sexy drill.” More

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      Seth Meyers Approves of the Obamas Dissing Donald Trump

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      The “Late Night” host remarked that former President Barack Obama burned Donald Trump “without even saying a word” on Day 2 of the D.N.C.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Double-Teaming Donald TrumpFormer President Barack Obama and his wife, Michelle Obama, gave rousing speeches on the second night of the Democratic National Convention on Tuesday.On Wednesday’s “Late Night,” Seth Meyers said that Michelle Obama “brought down the house when she tore into Trump.”“She is very, very good. I’m a little bummed she doesn’t want to get into politics, but I’m very happy she doesn’t want to host a late-night talk show.” — SETH MEYERSBarack Obama’s speech, Meyers said, “got everyone talking when he took a jab at the size of Trump’s crowds.”“He did it without even saying a word — just a tiny hand gesture.” — SETH MEYERS“I’ve said it for years, and I’ll say it again: the best Obama is standup Obama.” — SETH MEYERS“That was the first time Trump was like, ‘That’s enough TV; I’m going to go exercise and read a book.’” — JIMMY FALLON“The last time Trump got burned that badly, he locked himself in his tanning bed.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, then Stormy Daniels said, ‘Nothing to fact check there.’” — JIMMY FALLON“I see what he did there. Yeah, yeah, that’s brutal. That’s the second time this summer that the Secret Service has failed to protect Trump from a lethal attack.” — JORDAN KLEPPER, guest host of “The Daily Show”The Punchiest Punchlines (Turn Down for What Edition)“I just know that when Lil Jon wrote this song, he was thinking to himself, ‘This will absolutely rip at the 2024 Democratic National Convention.’” — JORDAN KLEPPER, on Lil Jon’s appearance at the D.N.C.“I didn’t know politics was so lit. I’m going to start voting!” — JORDAN KLEPPER“Oh my gosh! They don’t call it a political party for nothing’.” — RUPAUL, guest host of “Jimmy Kimmel Live”“C-SPAN even covered it and identified Lil Jon in a lower third, although they should have used his official title: ‘Rep. Lil Jon, Democrat, Crunksylvania.’” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth WatchingDiane Lane, who stars in “Feud: Capote vs. The Swans,” chatted with the guest host, RuPaul, on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” and recalled seeing Truman Capote on late-night shows in the 1970s.What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightJon Stewart will host Thursday’s “Daily Show” live from Chicago on the fourth and final night of the D.N.C.Also, Check This Out“My bed is so comfortable,” Hannah Gadsby said, “and that keeps me up at night.”Ian LaidlawThe Australian comic Hannah Gadsby takes on Taylor Swift and fans in a new routine, “Woof.” More

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      Nancy Pelosi Interrupted by Pro-Palestinian Protesters on ‘The Late Show’

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      “Isn’t it great to be in Chicago?” the former House speaker exclaimed in her appearance with Stephen Colbert, an apparent attempt to defuse the tension.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Speaker, InterruptedBroadcasting live from Night 2 of Chicago during the Democratic National Convention, Stephen Colbert on Tuesday night welcomed to “The Late Show” the former speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, who, as has been widely reported, was a key player in efforts to nudge to nudge her longtime colleague and friend President Biden out of the 2024 presidential race. As Pelosi began to answer — or, rather, deflect — a question about her private conversations with Biden, a protester in the audience began to shout about the ongoing war in Gaza. (See the clip below around the 3:40 mark.)Colbert, after acknowledging the protester, returned to the subject after a commercial break (see around 1:35 in the clip below), while also mentioning the wider pro-Palestinian protests surrounding the convention and within the Democratic Party. He asked:There is dissension over what is the proper use of American power — especially our projected power overseas, both firm and soft power — if the goal is the peaceful and prosperous future for both Israelis and Palestinians: What role does the United States play?After beginning by talking about Biden’s role, which Pelosi said he “played very well,” she went on to say that Israel had a right to defend itself and that “we want the hostages free.” She also said, “we don’t want children killed in Gaza, and so we have to come up with a solution.”Pelosi argued that “war has no role in a civilized society” (just after the 3:40 mark), at which point the protesters interrupted again; paraphrasing their words, Colbert explained, “They’ve said that the United States should not have any role in supplying arms to kill the people of Gaza.” Watch the full exchange below.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Late Night Suspects Convention Is a ‘Bitter Pill’ for Biden

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      “All night, Democrats were chanting ‘We love you, Joe!’ while Biden must have been thinking, ‘Um, apparently not as much as others,” Jimmy Fallon said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.No RegretsPresident Biden closed out the first night of the Democratic National Convention on Monday night, taking the stage for 45 minutes at about 11:30 p.m. Eastern.Jimmy Fallon said that appearing at the convention after dropping out of the race had to be a bitter pill for Biden to swallow — “although, at 81, it blends in with all the other pills.”“Yeah, all night, Democrats were chanting ‘We love you, Joe!’ while Biden must have been thinking, ‘Um, apparently not as much as others.’” — JIMMY FALLON“I mean, even Nancy Pelosi was chanting ‘We love Joe!’ and she’s the one who pushed him out of the race. It’s like the iceberg waving goodbye to the Titanic.” — DESI LYDICThe Punchiest Punchlines (Late Night Edition)“In an odd twist, Biden was awake at midnight while the rest of the country was asleep.” — JIMMY FALLON“He gave a rousing speech that lasted for 45 minutes, and I’ve got to say, it was a little like running into someone a month after you broke up with them, and they look good and they’re funny and they’re fiery, and you think to yourself, ‘Eh, still glad we broke up, but good for you.’” — SETH MEYERS“But hey, just because something’s on late at night, that doesn’t mean it’s not important, you know? I mean, people will stay up if they really want to see something, right? Or, you know, at least watch it on YouTube the next day?” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth WatchingAdam Sandler discussed his long-awaited “Happy Gilmore” sequel with Jimmy Fallon on Tuesday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightChance the Rapper will perform on Wednesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutMax Keller, a cellist turned music critic, started taking voice lessons two years ago. About a year into the lessons they started taking testosterone.Lindsay Perryman for The New York TimesThe transgender music critic Max Keller examines the change in their singing voice after a year of taking testosterone. More