Colbert joked on Monday night about a forthcoming book on the former president’s pandemic plan: “The main detail: There wasn’t one.”
Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Looking for more to watch? Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Detour to Guantánamo
A forthcoming book by two Washington Post journalists is said to provide new information about the Trump administration’s response to the coronavirus pandemic.
“The main detail: There wasn’t one,” Stephen Colbert joked on Monday night.
According to the book, early in the pandemic former President Donald J. Trump suggested sending Covid-infected American cruise ship passengers to the Guantánamo Bay naval base in Cuba to avoid adding to U.S. case numbers.
“The president wanted to send cruise ship passengers to Gitmo, so enjoy your beach day with a complimentary head sack, then hit the bar for bottomless piña colada boarding.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“And you know he said he wants to send them to ‘Geronimo Bay’ or something like that.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“Of course the reality star wanted to send them to an island. He probably sent a camera crew, too, and called it ‘Survirus’ or something.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“This is another good McNugget for the book. Trump — they say he was very upset about Covid testing because he believed that positive tests would look bad and hurt his chances of re-election. He had a call with Alex Azar, who was his secretary of health and human services, and he demanded to know what ‘idiot’ decided to make the federal government do testing, and Alex Azar was like, ‘Uh, do you mean Jared?’” — JIMMY KIMMEL, referencing Jared Kushner, Trump’s son-in-law and senior adviser
“Imagine being in that administration and someone calling you ‘the idiot.’ That’s like being in the N.B.A. and your nickname is ‘the tall guy.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
The Punchiest Punchlines (Half the Cheer Edition)
“The Olympics are almost here, and today organizers announced that venues will be at 50 percent capacity. That’s right, 50 percent, which means only four people will be allowed to watch fencing instead of the normal eight.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Tokyo residents will be allowed to go to the Games but will not be allowed to cheer and they have to go straight home after. Whoever came up with these rules should win the gold medal for buzzkill.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“Can you imagine going to a live sporting event with no cheering allowed? It’s like a Detroit Lions game.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“Also they said fans aren’t allowed to cheer. Although they say that at the beginning of every graduation, and parents are still like, ‘Thomas, yeah! Tommy, you did it. That’s my boy, Tommy!’” — JIMMY FALLON
The Bits Worth Watching
Paul Rudd crashed Bill Hader’s “Conan” interview on Monday night.
What We’re Excited About on Tuesday Night
Wanda Sykes, star of the new Netflix sitcom “The Upshaws,” will appear on Tuesday’s “Late Show.”
Also, Check This Out
James Taylor, Brandi Carlile and other artists reflect upon Joni Mitchell’s album “Blue” on its 50th anniversary.
Source: Television - nytimes.com
