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      Stephen Colbert Celebrates Sweden and Finland Applying to Join NATO

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      Colbert called the move “good news” based on it being “bad news for Russia.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.The Swedish Are ComingLeaders from Sweden joined Finland in announcing plans to submit an application for NATO on Tuesday.Stephen Colbert called the announcement “good news” because it’s “bad news for Russia.”“Wow, first Finland, now Sweden. It seems like every day we’re learning about another country we could have sworn was already in NATO.” — SETH MEYERS“Finland and Sweden are very serious about making this official. They each left a toothbrush in NATO’s bathroom already.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“One of Russia’s main goals in invading Ukraine was to weaken NATO. Now, instead, the alliance is ‘on the brink of starting its largest potential expansion in nearly two decades.’ How ironic. It’s — it’s like that O. Henry story where the guy buys his wife combs for her hair, and she joins NATO.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Primary Day Edition)“You can feel the electricity in the air because it is Primary Day all across America. Five states are choosing their party nominees for state and federal office: Pennsylvania, Oregon, Idaho, North Carolina and Kentucky. Or as election experts collectively know them, ‘POINCK.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Ah, yes, the excitement of midterm state primaries. Put the coffee on, honey, it’s gonna be an all-nighter.” — JAMES CORDEN“Idaho, Kentucky, North Carolina, Oregon and Pennsylvania all held primaries today, which, of course, is news to the vast majority of people in Idaho, Kentucky, North Carolina, Oregon and Pennsylvania.” — JAMES CORDEN“One of the most-watched races is in Pennsylvania, where Dr. Oz is trying to win the Republican nomination for senate. My apologies to Dr. Oz, but I can’t cross party lines — I’m a Dr. Phil guy through and through.” — JAMES CORDEN“Because there’s nothing more impressive than being called smart by a man who stared directly at an eclipse.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, referring to Dr. Oz’s touting his endorsement from Donald Trump.The Bits Worth WatchingJimmy Fallon and the “Tonight Show” guest Nick Jonas performed auto-tuned tracks based on topics such as “a Craigslist ad for a roommate.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightSarah Silverman will appear on Wednesday’s “Late Night With Seth Meyers.”Also, Check This OutA commuter walking past Nick Cave’s video work, “Every One,” which plays every quarter hour and brings the suits to life in motion.Amr Alfiky for The New York TimesThe musician-artist Nick Cave’s “Each One” installation shows Soundsuits “that seem to be in motion, creating visual vortexes, variously spinning and rising or falling,” in the subway under One Times Square. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel on North Korea’s First Reported Covid Outbreak

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      “According to their director of their national institute of infectious disease, Dr. Dennis Rodman, the virus, which until now had been ‘Un’-detected, has appeared,” Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Infection DetectionKim Jong-un declared a “maximum emergency” in North Korea on Thursday as the country reported its first outbreak of the coronavirus.“According to their director of their national institute of infectious disease, Dr. Dennis Rodman, the virus, which until now had been ‘Un’-detected, has appeared,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Thursday.“North Korea reported its first coronavirus outbreak today and ordered all cities and counties to enter a lockdown. Or as they call it, ‘business as usual.’” — SETH MEYERS“How did Covid even get into North Korea? Did Kid Rock play Pyongyang and not tell us about it?” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (24 Hours in Biden Edition)“While speaking yesterday to thousands of union electrical workers, President Biden referred to former President Trump as, quote, ‘the great MAGA king.’ OK, can we please not give him any more ideas?’” — SETH MEYERS“Congratulations, Joe! You’ve selected the one nickname that Trump will gladly use. I mean, I guarantee Trump already has that monogrammed on towels.” — JAMES CORDEN“Foolish move for Biden trying to play the nickname game with Trump. With Trump? You can’t do that. The guy — the guy is a terrible president, but he’s in the hall of fame when it comes to the nicknames. Right, Sleepy Joe?” — JAMES CORDEN“President Biden criticized Republicans at a fund-raiser last night for their recent attacks on Disney and said, quote, ‘They’re going to storm Cinderella’s castle before this is over.’ Oh, buddy, I hate to tell ya — if they’re storming anything, it’s the Hall of Presidents.” — SETH MEYERS“President Biden told a small gathering at a Democratic fund-raiser last night that it’s going to be ‘hard’ to maintain the majority in both houses of Congress, especially since they don’t have it in the first place.” — SETH MEYERS“But today Biden was back in Washington, where he hosted a — co-hosted a virtual Covid summit. The fact that the summit was held virtually pretty much tells you how we’re doing in the fight against Covid.”— JIMMY FALLON“The U.S. co-hosted a summit with Germany, Indonesia, Senegal and Belize. Good, all the heavy hitters are in on this.” — JIMMY FALLON“But Biden is serious about tackling the pandemic. That’s why today he announced the new head of his Covid task force, Patti LuPone.” — JIMMY FALLON“President Biden today called Ferdinand Marcos Jr. to congratulate him on winning the Philippine presidential election. Said Biden, ‘Remember, winning is the easy part — the hard part is convincing everybody that you actually won.’” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth WatchingJanelle James, star of “Abbott Elementary,” joined Desus and Mero to help children record pep talks on a “Keep It 100” hotline.Also, Check This OutJacoba Ballard in the documentary “Our Father.”Netflix“Our Father” tells the story of siblings who unite to bring to justice the fertility specialist who impregnated their mothers with his sperm without consent. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel: Today Is ‘a Stupefying Day in the History of This Country’

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      “Chuck Schumer said he called for the vote so we would know where Republicans stand. Turns out, they’re standing in the year 1865,” Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Stuck in the PastOn Wednesday, the Senate voted against legislation that would have guaranteed abortion rights nationwide.Jimmy Kimmel referred to the blocking of the bill as “a stupefying day in the history of this country.”“Even though a strong majority of American voters want those rights protected, every Democrat voted in favor of the bill except Joe Manchin, who voted with his fellow Republicans.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“With the Supreme Court likely to overturn Roe v. Wade, the Democrats wanted to get their counterparts on the record opposing it. Chuck Schumer said he called for the vote so we would know where Republicans stand. Turns out, they’re standing in the year 1865.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“It almost feels like maybe we shouldn’t have let the host of ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ pick three Supreme Court justices, you know?” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Put Out to Pasture Edition)“President Biden spoke today in Illinois about his administration’s plan to support farmers. Although I feel like he should be asking about their plan to support him: [imitating Biden] ‘You guys got one of those Charlotte’s Web spiders who can write something nice about me?’” — SETH MEYERS“Well guys, today President Biden visited a farm in Illinois, where he announced new steps to fight rising food costs and inflation. You know your presidency is in rough shape when your staff is like, ‘It’s time to drive you to a farm upstate.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, when Biden first arrived, a Secret Service agent was like, ‘Older McDonald is on the farm. E-I-E-I-O.’” — JIMMY FALLON“But this is strange: At one point Biden actually walked into a corn field and slowly disappeared: ‘If you build back better, votes will come.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Tonight Show” guest Florence Welch was joined by Jimmy Fallon and Jimmy Buffett for a performance of “Margaritaville.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightAmy Sedaris will pop by Thursday’s “Late Night.”Also, Check This OutGeorge Carlin on “Saturday Night Live” in 1975. His fans include Joe Rogan and Jim Gaffigan.Herb Ball/NBCU Photo Bank, via Getty ImagesNearly 14 years after his death, the comedian George Carlin still has the power to make people across the political spectrum laugh. More

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      James Corden Calls Trump a ‘Scam Account’

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      Corden joked that “banning Trump is like the one good thing Twitter has done in like a decade.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Scam LikelyElon Musk said that should his purchase of Twitter go through, he plans to lift the ban on Donald Trump’s account.“Tell you what: we are leaving this show in the nick of time, gang,” James Corden joked on Tuesday’s “Late Late Show.” Corden announced in late April that he will leave the CBS show next year. .@elonmusk wants to end Twitter’s Trump ban pic.twitter.com/CmS52oaA00— The Late Late Show with James Corden (@latelateshow) May 11, 2022
      “Musk explained that permanent bans should be reserved for bots, scam or spam accounts. I could say it’s a scam. It’s a scam! Donald Trump is a scam account. It’s all a scam.” — JAMES CORDEN“Musk said banning Trump from Twitter was ‘a morally bad decision, to be clear, and foolish in the extreme.’ Oh, good. We have the part-time D.J. who makes flamethrowers and cars that fart in charge of morality now.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The guy who names his kids Roman numerals will make sure they don’t do anything foolish.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Seriously, banning Trump is like the one good thing Twitter has done in like a decade. It’s that, the wheels versus doors debate, and the time that one guy said his cousin looks like a honey bun. That’s basically it.” — JAMES CORDENThe Punchiest Punchlines (Ciao Amico Edition)“Earlier today, President Biden met with the prime minister of Italy at the White House. It was Mario Draghi’s first trip to Washington. Italy’s prime minister, Mario Draghi — or as Joe Biden calls him, ‘Freddie Spaghetti.’” — JAMES CORDEN“It was a friendly meeting. Biden opened with, ‘Welcome, or as they say in your country, when you’re here, you’re family.’” — JAMES CORDEN“This is true: back at home, the prime minister is facing growing dissent, even from his own party. When Biden heard this, he was like, ‘Nice, man — me too.’” — JAMES CORDENThe Bits Worth WatchingSeth Meyers took his writers to task for their poorly penned monologue jokes on Tuesday’s “Late Night.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightFlorence Welch will sit down with Jimmy Fallon and then perform as Florence and the Machine on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutThe 2022 Pulitzer Prize-winning books include Joshua Cohen’s novel “The Netanyahus” and Ada Ferrer’s “Cuba: An American History.” More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Finds It ‘Impossible to Believe’ Trump Ordered Protesters Be Shot

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      Kimmel weighed in on a former defense secretary’s allegations about the president wanting paratroopers to fire on demonstrators outside the White House.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.That Son of a GunMark Esper, the former secretary of defense, said Sunday night on “60 Minutes” that former President Donald Trump suggested paratroopers begin shooting demonstrators during the George Floyd protests outside of the White House in June 2020. Esper referred to Trump’s request as “shocking.”Jimmy Kimmel called the anecdote “almost impossible to believe,” but later joked “In fairness, he said the same thing about Eric,” his son.“It is shocking. So shocking you should have told us about it at the time.” — SETH MEYERS“It’s also somehow not surprising to me that Trump would specifically request paratroopers, although it also wouldn’t surprise me if he doesn’t know what that word meant. I mean, maybe he knows it’s parachutes, or maybe he thinks it’s the two guys from ‘CHiPs.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (A Tale of Two Presidents: Mother’s Day Edition)“Meanwhile, this weekend was also Mother’s Day, of course. Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers out there. And I saw that first lady Jill Biden spent the day in Ukraine and met with the Ukrainian first lady. Yeah, basically, Joe got her an Edible Arrangement for Mother’s Day and Jill was like, ‘You know what? I’m going to go to Ukraine — I’m good.’” — JIMMY FALLON“To be fair, it was the only place that still had an availability for brunch.” — JAMES CORDEN“This is when you really see the difference between our current president and the last one. So Joe Biden yesterday tweeted to his wife: ‘Happy mother @flotus. You’re the love of my life and the life of my love. You bring me joy and laughter every day, and I’m so grateful for everything you do for our family.’ Very sweet. So Trump, then — Trump chose more of a ‘Yo Momma’s Day’ message.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“On Truth Social, he wrote: ‘Happy Mother’s Day to all, including racist, vicious, highly partisan, politically motivated and very unfair radical left Democrat judges, prosecutors, district attorneys, and attorney generals, who campaign unrelentingly against you without knowing a thing, and endlessly promise to take you down.’ This is his Mother’s Day tweet, OK? ‘After years of persecution, even the fake news says there is no case or, at best, it would be very hard to bring. someday soon they will start fighting record-setting violent crime. I love you all!’ And yeah, it’s a harsh message, but you know, if you color it in a little bit, it’s actually quite sweet.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“What do you think Trump did for Melania on Mother’s Day — offer her a bite of his McGriddle?” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingJack Harlow did his first interview on a talk show on Monday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightThe reunited Kids in the Hall will appear on Tuesday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This Out“A Strange Loop” received more Tony Award nominations than any other show.Sara Krulwich/The New York TimesThis year’s Tony Award nominations include 11 nods for the new musical “A Strange Loop.” More

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      Trevor Noah Has Thoughts on the Rise in Interest Rates

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      Noah blamed inflation on “the pandemic, supply chain issues and a Russian man who clearly wasn’t hugged enough as a child.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.High Level of InterestThe Fed raised interest rates by half a percentage point on Wednesday in an effort to curb inflation.On Thursday’s “Daily Show,” Trevor Noah blamed inflation on “the pandemic, supply chain issues and a Russian man who clearly wasn’t hugged enough as a child.”“And because of that, everything costs more: groceries, gas, blackmail. It’s terrible!” — TREVOR NOAH“Think of the economy like a house party, all right? Yeah, you want it to be banging, you know what I mean? You want it to be banging, but you don’t want it to get out of control because then no one can get a drink, and everyone is punching and fighting over what is left — it’s chaos, basically, it’s chaos! So raising the interest rate is like trying to calm the party down. But if you’re too extreme and you call the cops or you turn on the light and everyone sees who they were dancing with, now the party ends. The whole thing shuts down, that’s the recession of a party. So what the Federal Reserve is trying to do is change the players just enough so people stay, but then also make sure that nobody is dancing on the table.” — TREVOR NOAH“After yesterday’s rate hike, the markets went up 932 points. Pretty good. But this morning, as one reporter described it, ‘Investors woke up with a binge-trading hangover.’ Oh, you’ve got to be careful when you binge-trade; otherwise, you could wake up next to a stock you don’t even remember acquiring.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Then today, everything went kablooey. The Dow tumbled over 1,000 points, in the worst day of the year so far, eclipsing the previous worst day of the year: every day of the year.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Mexican St. Patrick’s Day Edition)“Happy Cinco de Mayo. Yeah, it’s that one day when people are excited to hear someone say, ‘I’ve got Corona!’” — JIMMY FALLON“What a day after two years of working from home — it was nice to have those vaguely problematic parties back in the office again.” — JIMMY FALLON“Meanwhile, today President Biden hosted a Cinco de Mayo reception in the Rose Garden with the first lady of Mexico. Yeah, Biden talked about the warm relationship between the U.S. and Mexico. It’s better than Trump’s message on Cinco de Mayo, which was ‘Think outside the bun.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Now, a lot of people mistakenly believe that today is Mexican Independence Day. It’s not — it’s Mexican St. Patrick’s Day. That’s why we drink green margaritas.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Cinco de Mayo isn’t even celebrated in all of Mexico. And here in the U.S., it only began to take off in the 1970s and ’80s, when brewing companies began capitalizing on it as a way to appeal to consumers. Wow, promoting a holiday for corporations to make money? That is so — that is so crass. I can’t believe it. You know, breaks your heart. Well, at least we’ll always have the Feast of St. Oktoberfest.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingAhead of Mother’s Day this weekend, celebrities like Kristen Bell, Andy Cohen and Sandra Oh read texts from their moms on Thursday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutOn her show, “Oh God, a Show About Abortion,” Alison Leiby addressed the news that the Supreme Court could be on the verge of overturning Roe v. Wade. Desiree Rios for The New York TimesAlison Leiby had just performed her show “Oh God, a Show About Abortion” when she learned of the leaked draft opinion showing that the Supreme Court could be on the verge of overturning Roe v. Wade. More

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      Seth Meyers Is Tired of Republicans’ Playing the Victim

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      “Do all these pundits whining about the leak really think this is what will shatter the integrity of the court?” Meyers said of the disclosure of a draft ruling from the Supreme Court overturning abortion rights.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Whose Choice?Right-wing politicians and television networks responded to the news of the leak of a draft Supreme Court ruling overturning Roe v. Wade this week by focusing not on the content of the leak, but on revealing the identity of the leaker.“How will they ever recover from this breach of their personal privacy?” Seth Meyers asked. “Maybe Samuel Alito can start wearing a shirt that says, ‘My judicial body, my choice.’”“And how do you know it’s a liberal? It could have just as easily been a conservative — [coughs] Ginni Thomas [coughs] — who leaked the opinion to freeze the majority in place and stop the chief justice, John Roberts, from trying to convince one of the other court’s conservatives to soften their stance. I have no idea, but the fact that they’re all freaking out about the leak instead of celebrating the victory is telling. It underscores yet again that even at the height of their powers, these people always have to play the victim. If they won a free car on ‘Wheel of Fortune,’ they’d immediately start whining: ‘But I already have two cars in my garage — I don’t have space for a brand-new Stingray. This is so unfair!’” — SETH MEYERS“Yes, a left-wing Antifa law clerk trying to sabotage the court, or a right-wing MAGA head trying to lock the decision in place. Or maybe it was the butler. It’s always the butler.” — TREVOR NOAH“Do all these pundits whining about the leak really think this is what will shatter the integrity of the court? Not the fact that Republicans stole a seat from President Obama or the fact that several of their nominees apparently lied to the Senate about their positions on Roe, or the fact that one of them called opposition to his nomination based on credible sexual assault allegations a smear campaign orchestrated by shadowy left-wing groups and the Clintons? I could go on, so I will.” — SETH MEYERS“Look, I can understand the argument that this leak is bad for the institution of the Supreme Court. But come on — did you think waiting to release it this summer was going to make it a hot beach read? ‘Your Body, His Choice.’” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Star Wars Day Edition)“Guys, today is May the 4th, also known as Star Wars Day — as in ‘May the fourth be with you.’ That’s right, Star Wars’Day, or for guys in their 30s celebrating it, Solo de Mayo.” — JIMMY FALLON“Ah, but Star Wars Day is interesting, ’cause it’s the one time of year when Tinder tries to match you with your sister, you know what I’m saying? You haven’t seen the movie? Don’t blame me; blame George Lucas. I didn’t write it.” — JIMMY FALLON“‘Star Wars’ is one of the only movie franchises with its own holiday. You don’t see anybody dressing up as Vin Diesel and wishing you a happy Fast 5th.’” — MIKE BIRBIGLIA, guest-hosting “Jimmy Kimmel Live”The Bits Worth WatchingNorah Jones performed her hit “Don’t Know Why” on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show” in celebration of her 20th anniversary super-deluxe edition of her Grammy-winning album “Come Away With Me.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightThe “Hacks” star Hannah Einbinder will appear on Thursday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutDrag performers from Hell in a Handbag Productions shopped at Golden-Con, where vendors sold sundry items like “Golden Girls” fans.Evan Jenkins for The New York TimesThousands of “Golden Girls” fans gathered in Chicago for Golden-Con, a celebration of their favorite TV show. More

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      Stephen Colbert Reacts to the Supreme Court Leak

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      “Congratulations, ladies, your decisions are being made by four dudes and a woman who thinks ‘The Handmaid’s Tale’ is a rom-com,” Colbert said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Roe NoLate-night hosts reacted to the news of the Supreme Court leak on Tuesday, lambasting the court’s still-unofficial majority decision to overturn Roe v. Wade.“Congratulations, ladies, your decisions are being made by four dudes and a woman who thinks ‘The Handmaid’s Tale’ is a rom-com,” Stephen Colbert said.“Personally, I got suspicious when Neil Gorsuch stopped wearing his ‘pussy hat’.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“That’s right, it looks like the Supreme Court will overturn Roe v. Wade. Apparently, they decided masks aren’t mandatory, but Mother’s Day is.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, that means all across the country, women in places like South Dakota or Missouri or even Texas will have the exact same abortion rights as women in Afghanistan under the Taliban. Yeah, and just think about that: We just evacuated people out of Afghanistan, and now we’re going to have to evacuate them out of Tennessee?” — TREVOR NOAH“Most people thought the freedom to choose was just how America was. No one ever thought the G.O.P. could roll it back by playing a reverse Uno card.” — TREVOR NOAH“For perspective, consider this: It wasn’t until the year after Roe v. Wade that women in America got the legal right to have a credit card without a man. Think about that. Yeah. And I think we would all agree it would be a little weird if the court was suddenly like, ‘Look, if the founders wanted women to have credit cards, they would have said so. They would have.’” — TREVOR NOAHThe Punchiest Punchlines (The Leak Edition)“Today, Chief Justice John Roberts condemned the leak and announced that there will be an investigation into how it got out. Americans are like, ‘Uh, the leak is not our main concern.’” — JIMMY FALLON“The conservative majority on the court has a fundamental right to choose when they want to release a decision into the world. Imagine having some random person violate your privacy and make that choice for you. Who would do such a thing?” — TREVOR NOAH“This leak is a clear violation of the court’s right to privacy. How dare someone make this decision for them.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It’s crazy how conservatives always manage to make themselves the victim in any situation. I mean, they have just accomplished this thing that they’ve been working toward for 50 years, and their first reaction is ‘It’s so unfair what’s happening to us!’ I’m sorry, what, you wanted your ruling to be a big surprise and now someone ruined it?” — TREVOR NOAHThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Late Night” writers Amber Ruffin and Jenny Hagel reacted to the Supreme Court news with concerns about Democrats’ getting anything done.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightSheryl Crow will talk about her new Showtime documentary, “Sheryl,” on Wednesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutEmma Galbraith as Angie Chen in “Inbetween Girl.”UtopiaMei Makino’s “Inbetween Girl” is a coming-of-age drama following an artsy, biracial high school student grappling with the guilt of sleeping with another girl’s boyfriend. More