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      Stephen Colbert Has News for Fans of Fox

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      “If there are any Fox viewers watching this — first off, I assume you’re looking for remote batteries. Try the junk drawer in the kitchen,” Colbert said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Error 404: Journalism Not Found’Rupert Murdoch, the chairman of the media empire that owns Fox News, acknowledged in a deposition that several hosts on his conservative news network promoted false narratives that the 2020 election was stolen from former President Donald Trump, court documents released on Monday showed.“If there are any Fox viewers watching this — first off, I assume you’re looking for remote batteries. Try the junk drawer in the kitchen,” Stephen Colbert joked on Tuesday’s “Late Show.” “Second, you should know a few things about Fox that it isn’t telling you.”“Fox News is being sued for defamation because their hosts endorsed lies about the 2020 election, while their text messages to each other prove that they knew Joe Biden won fair and square, and that their guests talking about stealing the election were all crazy liars. Also, no one can invent a pillow — they already existed!” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Last month, Murdoch sat down for a deposition as part of Dominion Voting Systems’ $1.6 billion lawsuit against Fox News, and he admitted under oath that election lies were knowingly endorsed by Fox hosts Sean Hannity, Jeanine Pirro, Lou Dobbs and Maria Bartiromo, collectively known as dumb, dumber, dumbest and Sean Hannity.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The Dominion lawsuit is a massive story, which is why Fox News isn’t covering it. In fact, if you go to their website and search the past two months for the words ‘Dominion Voting Systems,’ you don’t get an article — not a single article. You just get a page that says ‘Error 404: Journalism Not Found.’” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Fox News Group Chat Edition)“There was no mention of any of this on Fox News today. And here’s the thing: the reason they’re keeping this quiet — I know this is going to be a shock — is because Fox News lied to us.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Conservative media mogul Rupert Murdoch today said that they knowingly endorsed election fraud falsehoods. When reached for comment, Fox News replied, ‘Whoopsy daisy!’” — JAMES CORDEN“That’s not shocking. If Brian Kilmeade ever completed a Wordle, that would be shocking.” — HASAN MINHAJ“Oh, my God! Do you realize what this means? These people are secretly sane! They also don’t respect anyone they have on their show. These guys are texting each other all day about how [expletive] Fox News is. Their group chat is basically MSNBC.” — HASAN MINHAJThe Bits Worth WatchingAmber Ruffin and Jenny Hagel, writers on “Late Night,” made some “Jokes Seth Can’t Tell” about Black History Month and a lesbian kiss on “Yellowstone.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightSheryl Lee Ralph, a star on “Abbott Elementary,” will sit down with James Corden on Wednesday’s “Late Late Show.”Also, Check This OutMaking the Tokyo episode did not change Eugene Levy’s feeling about sushi.Apple TV+Eugene Levy is going worldwide hosting his new Apple+ TV show, “The Reluctant Traveler.” More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Responds to Reports He Caused a ‘Trumper Tantrum’

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      A report said Donald Trump tried to get Disney to reprimand Kimmel for making fun of him. “In other words, President Karen demanded to speak to my manager,” Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Trumper Tantrum’On Monday night, Jimmy Kimmel addressed a Rolling Stone report that said in 2018, then-President Trump asked White House officials to call Disney and demand that Kimmel stop making jokes about him. Disney owns ABC, which broadcasts Kimmel’s show.“The report says at least two calls were made from the Trump White House to ‘convey the president’s anger regarding Kimmel’s monologues and jabs,’” Kimmel said. “In other words, President Karen demanded to speak to my manager.”“You’d think the guy who fathered Eric and Don Jr. would know how to handle jokes, but I guess not.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“You know what, maybe this is why Donald and Melania sleep in separate bedrooms — she was laughing too hard at my monologue at night.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“But really, joking aside, this is a blatant abuse of power. I wonder if Fox News — you know they’re always screaming about censoring comedians — will they defend me on this? I doubt it.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I wonder what it was specifically that sparked this, his Trumper tantrum.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Low Confidence Edition)“The U.S. Energy Department just released a new report that said the Covid pandemic might have been started by a Chinese lab leak. Americans heard and were like, ‘Hey, thanks for that three years too late information. Any “Game of Thrones” spoilers?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, they think Covid started in a lab, but said, ‘They only have low confidence in the report.’ ‘Low confidence,’ which is just one notch above, ‘We have no freaking idea.’” — JIMMY FALLON“How can you conclude something with low confidence? That’s not a conclusion. I think the word you’re looking for is ‘guess.’” — HASAN MINHAJ, guest host of “The Daily Show”“I mean, low confidence — that’s like me saying, ‘I think I can bench 3,000 pounds, but I have low confidence.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, you could tell by the way they delivered the news: ‘Um, maybe it was a lab leak? That’s stupid. Forget I said anything.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The conclusion had low confidence. But honestly, once the ‘Queer Eye’ guys get ahold of it, give it a new haircut, teach it how to make guacamole, it’ll be a whole new conclusion, you just wait.” — JAMES CORDENThe Bits Worth Watching“Neil Young” performed the new viral hit “Angela Bassett Did the Thing” on Monday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightThe actress Rebel Wilson will appear on Tuesday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutRachel Brosnahan and Oscar Isaac in Anne Kauffman’s revival of “The Sign in Sidney Brustein’s Window” at the Brooklyn Academy of Music.Sara Krulwich/The New York TimesOscar Isaac and Rachel Brosnahan star in a rare revival of Lorraine Hansberry’s “The Sign in Sidney Brustein’s Window.” More

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      Sarah Silverman Defines ‘Woke’ for Newsmax

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      “The Daily Show” guest host Sarah Silverman called Newsmax “basically an even more far-right Fox News — like if your crazy uncle had a crazy uncle.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Sick Burn, BroOn Tuesday, a reporter for Newsmax asked Karine Jean-Pierre, the White House press secretary, if President Biden was “woke.”Sarah Silverman, guest host for “The Daily Show,” called Newsmax “basically an even more far-right Fox News — like if your crazy uncle had a crazy uncle.”“I think we’re just communicating wrong, because, like, what I know ‘woke’ to mean is, like, learning new things about people or the world, and then acting accordingly. Like, basic kindness. Maybe a gesture of care to people who are more vulnerable than you. You know what, actually you wouldn’t like it — it’s Jesus stuff.” — SARAH SILVERMAN“This guy really thinks, ‘Is Joe Biden woke’ was like a hard-hitting question. The real hard-hitting question would be, ‘Is Joe Biden awake?’” — SARAH SILVERMAN“It feels cooler to say, ‘I’m not woke’ than the truth, which is, ‘I’m terrified of what I don’t understand and I only know how to process that as anger because I can’t look inward.’” — SARAH SILVERMANThe Punchiest Punchlines (Probably Not Aliens Edition)“And there’s still confusion about the three unidentified objects the United States government shot down over the weekend. Intelligence officials now say that they do not believe the objects were from China or posed any kind of national security threat. This is all a very evasive way of saying that they shot down three Bud Light blimps.” — JAMES CORDEN“No aliens. Nothing to see here. In a totally unrelated story, Monday, the United States has set up a new task force on U.F.Os.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“According to Axios, the military didn’t classify what the objects were, but they don’t think they were aliens or Chinese spy balloons. Best guess right now is that there are some overly aggressive Re/Max agents on the loose.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“China is sticking to their claim that the first one we shot down was a weather balloon that got blown 12,000 miles off course. How ‘off course’ can you get? You missed by an ocean, if that’s the case.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The Pentagon this week described the unidentified object shot down over Canada on Saturday as a ‘small, metallic balloon.’ So it was either a dire national security threat or a wasted 25 cents at a county fair.” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth Watching“Jimmy Kimmel Live” found a bunch of people who lied on camera about seeing a fictional U.F.O. on Wednesday’s “Lie Witness News.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightTina Fey will hang out with her old friend Seth Meyers on Thursday’s “Late Night.”Also, Check This OutStephan DybusPodcast companies are feeling the strain of oversaturation and overspending. More

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      Stephen Colbert is Underwhelmed by Nikki Haley’s Big Announcement

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      “As she said in her campaign announcement tweet, ‘Get excited,’” Colbert said on Tuesday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Nicky Fail-y’Former Gov. Nikki Haley of South Carolina announced she’s running for president early Tuesday morning.“Of course, any campaign veteran will tell you there is no better time to drop the biggest political news of your life than on Valentine’s Day at 6:48 a.m.” Stephen Colbert said. “Yeah, a day everyone’s thinking about something else at a time when no one is awake.”“The only way this could make a smaller splash is if Haley had whispered it into a bowl of soup.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“As she said in her campaign announcement tweet ‘Get excited.’ A grateful pass.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“But this is going to be a tough race for Nikki Haley. Right now, she’s polling at just one percent, and that’s pretty bad. I mean, you know, even Mike Pence is at two percent. Mike Pence’s noose rope is at five percent, which is V.P. material.” — SARAH SILVERMAN“She said she believes the Republican Party needs to go in a new direction. I think you’d have more luck convincing a swarm of moths to go in a new direction. The whole ‘towards the light’ thing isn’t really working.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Haley is the first prominent Republican to challenge Donald Trump, she’s the first female governor of South Carolina and the first candidate to spell her name like the bass player from Mötley Crüe, so …” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Now I guess this means Trump has to come up with a mean nickname for her. ‘Cuz right now he’s pacing around Mar-a-Lago going ‘Sicky Nikki? Nikki Fail-y? Oh, Nikki Epic Fail-y?’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Today, former Trump cabinet member Nikki Haley announced that she is running for president. Yep. She served in Trump’s cabinet, which is listed on her website in very, very small font.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Folder Enthusiast Edition)“A lawyer for former President Trump said recently that Trump was using a manila folder marked ‘classified’ to block a small light on a landline phone next to his bed. Even weirder: all the ones that he taped up to use in place of curtains.” — SETH MEYERS“I don’t know, maybe use an eye mask, get a, you know, a different bedside phone, put a Post-it on it?” — JAMES CORDEN“Basically, he’s saying, ‘I’m not a traitor, I’m a hoarder!’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Which is more embarrassing for Trump: the fact that he kept top-secret documents or admitting he collects folders? I mean, how dull do you have to be to be a folder enthusiast?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The worst thing about this story is now I’m picturing Trump in bed on a landline phone talking to Tucker Carlson, sort of twirling the cord around his finger going, ‘No, you hang up!’” — JAMES CORDENThe Bits Worth WatchingThe actress Alison Brie recreated a Valentine’s Day memory from high school on Tuesday’s “Late Late Show.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightThe NBA legend Kareem Abdul-Jabbar will sit down with Sarah Silverman on Wednesday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutA museum in Croatia displays mementos and stories of people’s failed relationships.via Museum of Broken RelationshipsThe Museum of Broken Relationships in Croatia collects mementos people around the world send in symbolizing their failed romances. More

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      Late Night Recaps Rihanna’s Super Bowl Halftime Surprise

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      Jimmy Kimmel called the pop singer’s pregnancy reveal “the biggest ‘we’re expecting’ announcement in the history of the world.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Super Bowl, Baby!Rihanna’s Super Bowl halftime show was popular with late-night hosts on Monday, who praised the pop star for performing while pregnant.Jimmy Kimmel called the reveal “what has to be the biggest ‘we’re expecting’ announcement in the history of the world.”“She had a baby in May and now has another one in the oven. So, if you are one of those 19 million people who called in sick to work today, Rihanna last night had a 9-month-old in her dressing room, she was eight millimeters dilated, still managed to get out there and do her job.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Rihanna did a Super Bowl halftime show while pregnant. Meanwhile, everyone at home on their 30th chicken wing was like, ‘I also felt a kick.’” — JIMMY FALLON“During her halftime show performance at last night’s Super Bowl, Rihanna revealed that she was pregnant, while the rest of us just ate like we were.” — SETH MEYERS“Imagine it’s the first day of kindergarten and your fun fact is that you’ve done the Super Bowl halftime show.” — JIMMY FALLON“Seriously, did you see that, pregnant women? Did you see it? Rihanna just did a Super Bowl halftime show while pregnant, and you want my seat on the subway? Not anymore, toots. No way. The bar has been raised, so hold it.” — SARAH SILVERMAN, this week’s “Daily Show” guest host“Not only did she sound great, she closed the performance by — I don’t know if you saw this — really incredible, she closed the show by shooting down one of those U.F.O.s.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Alien Balloons Edition)“Last night was Super Bowl 57, and, out of habit, Biden shot down the Goodyear blimp.” — SETH MEYERS“All of a sudden, there are more U.F.O.s than Chick-fil-A’s now.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I never in a million years thought I’d say this — where the hell is the Space Force?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yeah, nothing’s off the table. It could be aliens, it could be balloons, or it could be alien balloons.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The White House today announced they formed an interagency team to look into what’s going on. After initially refusing to rule it out, today they said they do not believe these are extraterrestrial visits, which is exactly what they say at the beginning of every movie about extraterrestrial visits.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingLizz Winstead, the co-creator of “The Daily Show,” talked with her friend Sarah Silverman about creating comedy news, and her organization that advocates for reproductive justice.What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightPaul Rudd, who stars in “Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania,” will sit down with Seth Meyers on Tuesday’s “Late Night.”Also, Check This OutThe late Celia Cruz performing in New York in 2001. The multiple Grammy Award winner is one of five honorees of the American Women Quarters Program, the U.S. Mint said.Scott Gries/Getty ImagesThe Queen of Salsa, Celia Cruz, will be the first Afro-Latina to be featured on the U.S. quarter. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Addresses Netflix’s Plan to Charge for Shared Accounts

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      “I understand. You don’t like paying for TV,” Kimmel said. “So, let me just say this: My name is Jimmy and I’m free every night, no charge.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Netflix and ShillNetflix is cracking down on password sharing outside of an account user’s household.“This is going to be a huge blow to Nick Cannon,” Jimmy Kimmel joked. “This could cost him millions of dollars.”“Some people may have to go back to stealing Netflix the old-fashioned way, sitting with binoculars in your neighbor’s tree.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“And to those of you who are out there piggybacking on someone else’s account, I get it. I understand. You don’t like paying for TV. So, let me just say this: my name is Jimmy and I’m free every night, no charge.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Another One Edition)“It’s Groundhog Day — again. It keeps happening.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Groundhog Day is a tradition that was brought to the United States in the 1800s by German settlers. The boring German settlers — the fun ones brought us beer.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“OK, but did he see his shadow or a calendar? Of course winter’s not over — it’s Feb. 2. There’s still football. Can we at least move this stupid ritual to mid-March where there’s a little mystery?” — SETH MEYERS“I read that he’s only right 40 percent of the time. When they heard that, Weather.com was like, ‘You’re hired — when can you start?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, you can’t trust Punxsutawney Phil. He’s basically the George Santos of the groundhog world.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingOn Thursday’s “Late Show,” The Last of Us” star Pedro Pascal talked with Jimmy Fallon about hosting “Saturday Night Live” this weekend.Also, Check This OutBeyoncé needs three wins to match the record for most Grammy victories by any artist.Chris Pizzello/Invision, via Associated PressAlready the winningest woman in Grammy history, Beyoncé has nine nominations for her album “Renaissance” at this Sunday’s Grammy Awards. More

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      Jimmy Fallon Jokes That President Biden’s Document Drama Is a ‘Humblebrag’

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      “First, they searched near Biden’s Corvette, now they’re searching his beach house,” Fallon said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.The Search ContinuesThe F.B.I. conducted a search of President Biden’s family vacation home in Rehoboth Beach, Del., on Wednesday but found no classified documents.“First, they searched near Biden’s Corvette, now they’re searching his beach house. I’m starting to think Biden created this whole scandal as a humblebrag,” Jimmy Fallon said.“[imitating Biden] ‘Why don’t you check by my infinity pool? Maybe there’s something behind the Picasso, I don’t know.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Biden’s attorneys found documents at his main house in Delaware last month, and the president has a regular house and a vacation house, both in Delaware. I don’t know — how’s that a vacation? Can you vacation from Delaware to Delaware?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“They didn’t find anything classified, but they did find a 1982 Zenith TV and three boxes of Parcheesi.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The F.B.I. reportedly searched President Biden’s Delaware beach house today as part of the ongoing investigation into his handling of classified documents. And I think he might be getting nervous, because he said, ‘You know what you should be searching? Hunter’s laptop! Crazy stuff in there!’” — SETH MEYERS“Speaking of Biden, today the White House announced that he will get his annual physical on Feb. 16. It’s going to be crazy after Biden’s colonoscopy when the doctor says, ‘There’s no easy way to tell you this, but we found more classified documents.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Bye-Bye, Brady Edition)“Tom Brady announced he’s decided to retire, but for real this time. Every year on the first of February, Tom Brady comes out of the locker room to announce his retirement. Then if he sees his shadow, he goes right back to the N.F.L.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“This dude retires more than Cher.” — D.L. HUGHLEY, guest host of “The Daily Show”“He was around for a long time. Let’s just say Brady was the only active N.F.L. player to see ‘Top Gun’ 1 and 2 in theaters.” — JIMMY FALLON“Brady is done and, in a related story, tickets to next year’s Buccaneers games are now free.” — JIMMY FALLON“Brady is moving on to bigger and better things. Yesterday, he was walking the red carpet for the premiere of his new film ‘80 for Brady.’ I hear it went pretty well until he tucked Rita Moreno under his arm and spiked her in the end zone.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Sadly, without football, he’s going to have to fill his days with nothing but being insanely rich, accomplished, fit, handsome and single.” — JAMES CORDENThe Bits Worth WatchingD.L. Hughley quizzed people in a man-on-the-street segment about Black History Month for “The Daily Show.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightJonathan Groff, who stars in “Knock at the Cabin,” will appear on Thursday’s “Late Night with Seth Meyers.”Also, Check This OutOscar Isaac and Rachel Brosnahan will lead the cast of the stage revival of a Lorraine Hansberry play. Erik Tanner for The New York TimesOscar Isaac and Rachel Brosnahan will star in the first major New York revival of Lorraine Hansberry’s 1964 Broadway play “The Sign in Sidney Brustein’s Window” at BAM this month. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Puts Mike Lindell Inside a Claw Machine

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      The MyPillow founder and election denier wanted to appear on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” again, but the host had one condition.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.The Man in the MachineMike Lindell, the MyPillow founder, who known for his elaborate conspiracy theories about the 2020 election, returned to “Jimmy Kimmel Live” on Tuesday, complying with Kimmel’s one condition: that he appear inside a claw machine at an arcade.In his monologue, Kimmel joked that the mustachioed Lindell was “here to finally answer the question: ‘What if Ted Lasso was on the F.B.I. watch list?’”“I do want to make something clear. I did not insist that Mike be in a claw machine because he’s not vaccinated; I insisted he be in a claw machine because it’s hilarious. This isn’t a political statement — this is just for fun.” — JIMMY KIMMELKimmel asked Lindell about his recent failed campaign for the chairmanship of the Republican National Committee. But Lindell kept bringing the conversation back to his insistence that machines had rigged the 2020 election.“First question, Mike, is why do you think people don’t take you seriously?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Mike, I know that you’re distrustful of machines. Now that you’re inside one, do you feel differently?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine, they’re cool, right?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“You know, one of the differences between you and the claw machine is claw machines let go. And you will not let go of this voting thing, will you?” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (That’s a Wrap Edition)“President Biden informed Congress yesterday that he will officially end the coronavirus pandemic emergency declaration in May, which means that everyone can finally stop wearing their mask a year ago.” — SETH MEYERS“The timing makes sense. Might as well squeeze in one more spring break public health emergency for old time’s sake.” — JAMES CORDEN“Take that, Covid, we beat you. Shove that up your nose and rotate it five times!” — STEPHEN COLBERT“This has been a long time coming. I wish you could see the smiles on the faces in my audience. And I wish I could, too, because they’re still wearing masks.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“I’m pretty sure the public ended the health emergency a while ago. Today, I saw a guy open a Starbucks bathroom with his tongue.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Daily Show” correspondent Jordan Klepper spoke with superfans of Donald Trump in South Carolina, some of whom insist he is still in office.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightThe newly minted Oscar nominee Jenny Slate will appear on Wednesday’s “Late Late Show with James Corden.”Also, Check This OutBonnie Raitt has won 10 Grammys since 1979. She’s up for four awards on Sunday, including song of the year.Peter Fisher for The New York TimesBonnie Raitt has been nominated for four Grammys this year, including her first for songwriting. More