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      ‘The Daily Show’ Ribs Biden Over Democratic Detractors

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      “You know you’re in trouble if even Danny Ocean is saying, ‘We can’t pull this one off,’” Desi Lydic joked after George Clooney called for Biden to drop out.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Ocean’s 24On Wednesday, Representative Nancy Pelosi, the former House speaker, responded to questions about whether the president should continue to seek re-election by saying that she would support President Biden, “whatever he decides.”“Keep in mind, Biden has said about 50 times that he’s staying in the race,” Jordan Klepper said on “The Daily Show.”“He’s like, ‘I’m not going anywhere. The Lord almighty couldn’t get me out of this race,’ and Pelosi’s going, ‘Yup, great, just let us know when you decide. Clock’s ticking — tick-tock.’” — JORDAN KLEPPER“By the way, it probably doesn’t help that as she was speaking, I kept thinking, ‘Man, I wish that Biden could channel the youth and vigor of Nancy Pelosi.’” — JORDAN KLEPPER“You know things are crazy when an 84-year-old Nancy Pelosi is telling an 81-year-old Joe Biden to retire.” — JIMMY FALLONIn the same segment, “The Daily Show” co-host Desi Lydic referred to George Clooney as an “even more powerful Democrat,” after he called for Biden to step aside in a Times opinion essay.“You know you’re in trouble if even Danny Ocean is saying, ‘We can’t pull this one off.’” — DESI LYDIC“It’s easy for him to say Biden’s too old — Clooney doesn’t age.” — JORDAN KLEPPER“George wrote a New York Times Op-Ed titled ‘I Love Joe Biden. But We Need a New Nominee,’ adding, ‘We also need a money guy, a safecracker, an acrobat and Brad Pitt. It’s the plot of ‘Ocean’s 24: Amal’s Busy With Human Rights Stuff and I Got Bored.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Wait, while we were all distracted by this Op-Ed, who was watching the money? Oh, it was a heist the whole time. Clooney!” — DESI LYDICThe Punchiest Punchlines (Different Strokes Edition)“At his rally last night in Florida, former President Trump challenged President Biden to a golf match. Biden’s actually interested because, in golf, the lowest number wins.” — SETH MEYERS“That’d be a crazy match. While Trump replaces a divot with his hairpiece, Biden will be in the sand trap with a metal detector.” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump said if Biden beats him, he’d give a million dollars to charity. Keep in mind, Charity is the name of a dancer at a club near Mar-a-Lago, but still, he’s going to give it to her.” — JIMMY FALLONWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Late Night Finds Democrats Still Ridin’ for Biden

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      “People waited all day for white smoke to emerge from the capital, signaling a new leader,” Jimmy Fallon joked after Congressional Democrats met in Washington on Tuesday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Blowing SmokeCongressional Democrats met in Washington on Tuesday to discuss their concerns about President Biden’s re-election campaign.“People waited all day for white smoke to emerge from the Capitol, signaling a new leader,” Jimmy Fallon said.“So today, Congressional Democrats gathered behind closed doors to talk about Biden’s future in what one of them called a ‘come-to-Jesus meeting.’ No, no! Do not let Joe come anywhere near Jesus until Nov. 6. Walk away from the light, Joe. Get away!” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Some described the meeting as very positive, while others said the room was filled with sadness. So, basically, our government has the same plot as ‘Inside Out 2.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Reports say the mood of the meeting was very somber, with some members comparing it to a funeral, while another said that analogy was an insult to funerals. Hey, Democrats, keep it light.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Meanwhile, that big old flirt President Biden hosted world leaders at the NATO summit in Washington today. But only one of them will be the next Golden Bachelor.” — KATHRYN HAHN, guest host of “Jimmy Kimmel Live”“When Biden walked into the room with 31 world leaders, he wasn’t sure if it was a NATO summit or an intervention.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (America’s Next Top Vice President Edition)“With the convention starting on Monday, the question on a lot of people’s minds is who will Donald Trump pick as his running mate? And, as of this taping, the latest reports say that Trump has narrowed it down to three: Senators Marco Rubio, J.D. Vance and North Dakota’s governor, Doug Burgum, a.k.a. the cute one.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It’s the perfect, perfect time for a reality show president to pick his running mate via reality show: [imitating Trump] ‘I see before me three beautiful candidates, but, sadly, only one can be America’s next top vice president.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT, on Trump wanting to announce his running mate at the Republican National Convention“Trump needs someone who is going to help him win, so right now the front-runner is Joe Biden.” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump’s campaign needs to win over women and minorities, which is why he’s narrowed it down to two white guys.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingAasif Mandvi, a former correspondent of “The Daily Show,” returned to promote his new horror-comedy series, “Evil.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightGovernor Gretchen Whitmer of Michigan will discuss her new memoir, “True Gretch,” on Wednesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutClockwise from left: Jonathan Lethem; Roxane Gay; Stephen King; Sarah Jessica Parker; Marlon James; Min Jin LeeThe New York TimesStephen King, Roxane Gay, Sarah Jessica Parker and more shared their picks for the top 10 books of the 21st century. More

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      Late Night Mulls Biden’s Decision to Stay in the Race

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      “He’s basically the guy doing 30 in the left lane, and he ain’t moving for anybody,” Jimmy Fallon said of President Biden on Monday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Staying the CoursePresident Biden has doubled down on his decision to seek re-election, defying critics who want him to step aside after his poor showing in the first debate with Donald Trump.On Monday, Jimmy Fallon joked that if Biden refused to drop out, Democrats planned “to tie a bunch of balloons to the White House and hope he flies away like the old guy from ‘Up.’”“It’s either that or put a bunch of Werther’s on the ground and lure him out like E.T.” — JIMMY FALLON“He’s basically the guy doing 30 in the left lane, and he ain’t moving for anybody.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, Biden’s brushing everyone off. He’s like, ‘Hey, people have been telling me not to run for president since 1988 — I think I know what I’m doing.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Democrats in Congress are reportedly trying to find the best way for Biden to ‘move forward,’ which is probably with one of those walkers with the tennis balls on the bottom of them.” — KATHRYN HAHN, guest host of “Jimmy Kimmel Live”“So, should he stay? Should he go? Who am I to recommend? I don’t know what’s going on in Joe Biden’s mind — something I apparently have in common with Joe Biden.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The truth is, both candidates are very old. This might be the first presidential race where a slick bathtub could alter the course of history.” — KATHRYN HAHNThe Punchiest Punchlines (Sleepy Joe Edition)“Meanwhile, today, amid calls for him to drop out of the election, Biden sent a letter to Democrats addressing concern about his age and says that he’s firmly committed to staying in the race. Yeah, and nothing says ‘I’m young’ like writing a sternly worded letter.” — JIMMY FALLONWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Counts Down to the First Presidential Debate

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      Kimmel doubted that Donald Trump would stick to his game plan of not interrupting President Biden, saying, “His discipline is unmatched!”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.One Week OutThe first presidential debate is one week away, and former President Donald Trump is said to have a game plan that includes not interrupting President Biden, as he has in the past.“And, as we all know, he has an uncanny ability to stick to his game plan,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Thursday. “His discipline is unmatched!”“Biden has secluded himself at Camp David, where he’s preparing for this bout like Rocky Balboa getting ready for ‘Golf Clubber’ Lang. And Trump is hard at work right now, deciding whether to go with the scented Aqua Net or unscented.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“You know, despite skipping every other debate, Trump reportedly cannot wait to attack Joe Biden. It’s the most he’s ever hated someone he wasn’t married to.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Next Thursday is the first 2024 presidential debate between President Biden and former President Trump, which means we’re just one week away from finding out who falls asleep onstage.” — SETH MEYERS“Forget the debate — I say we put them both in a hammock and the first one to stand up is our next president.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Ten Commandments Edition)“Louisiana yesterday became the first state to require public schools to display the Ten Commandments in every classroom. Apparently, they’ve been having a lot of trouble with kids coveting their neighbor’s oxen.” — SETH MEYERS“Maybe they should also post the Constitution in the Louisiana governor’s office so he can give it a read every once in a while.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Oh, come on, everybody knows if you want to make something accessible to kids, you don’t put it in a big font; you put it in a Hello Kitty Trapper Keeper.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“I hate to break it to you, but Louisiana ranks 38th in reading — I don’t think the font is going to help.” — DESI LYDIC“I will say, in fairness, the point in posting the Ten Commandments in schools is to remind third-graders not to commit adultery.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingChappell Roan performed her hit song “Good Luck, Babe!” on Thursday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutDonald Sutherland as President Snow in “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire.” He campaigned for the role in the franchise.Murray Close/LionsgateDonald Sutherland’s consistent and reliable work transcended genres and eras in Hollywood. The veteran actor died on Thursday at 88. More

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      Jimmy Fallon Mocks Kim Jong-un and Putin for Making Things Official

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      “Then they got a text from Trump that said, ‘Throuple?’” Fallon joked on Wednesday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Date With a DictatorKim Jong-un and Vladimir Putin met in Pyongyang on Wednesday where they signed a pact of mutual support against “aggression” and took a driving tour of the city, standing together in the sunroof.“They’re sticking their heads out of the roof like they’re going to Dictator Prom,” Jimmy Fallon said.“Yep, Kim Jong-un and Putin made it official. Then they got a text from Trump that said, ‘Throuple?’” — JIMMY FALLON“The two leaders also exchanged gifts, and Putin gave him a car. And because it was for Kim Jong-un, it was one of those plastic Jeeps.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Happy Juneteenth Edition)“Today is Juneteenth. That’s right. Or as it’s called on Fox News, it’s ‘Wednesday.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trump posted all the usual angry garbage and made no mention of the holiday. But he doesn’t need to, because, as we all know, Trump has done more for Black Americans than almost anyone.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Historically, Juneteenth is a day for cookouts and barbecues but can also be a celebration with a day of rest and remembrance. Of course, the traditional way to celebrate Juneteenth is to hang out with your Black friends, listen to great music, and stand perfectly still.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, referencing President Joe Biden at a recent Juneteenth celebrationThe Bits Worth WatchingWednesday’s “Late Show” guest Cynthia Erivo discussed the playlist she made for her role as Elphaba in the new movie adaptation of “Wicked.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night“The Bear” star Ebon Moss-Bachrach will appear on Thursday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutIn 1925, the New York Public Library system established the first public collection dedicated to Black artifacts at its 135th Street branch in Harlem, now known as the Schomburg Center for Research in Black Culture.New York Public LibraryNew scholarship highlights how Black librarians played a big role in community building during the Harlem Renaissance. More

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      Late Night Trolls Trump Over ‘Severe Memory Issues’

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      “I’m starting to think Trump writes his name on buildings just so he can remember where he lives,” Jimmy Fallon said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘50 First Debates’Ramin Setoodeh, the author of “Apprentice in Wonderland,” a new book about Donald Trump, said that the former president had “severe memory issues” and forgot who Setoodeh was in a follow-up interview.“I’m starting to think Trump writes his name on buildings just so he can remember where he lives,” Jimmy Fallon joked.“I love how Trump didn’t remember who the author was but still talked to him for 10 hours.” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump and Biden are accused of having memory issues, which is why they’re starring in the new film ‘50 First Debates.’” — JIMMY FALLON“The author of the upcoming book ‘Apprentice in Wonderland’ said in a new interview that former President Trump has ‘severe memory issues.’ ‘Same here,’ said undecided voters.” — SETH MEYERS“He loves talking about himself so much, he made time to do an interview for a book about ‘The Apprentice.’ I feel like you could get him to host ‘The Apprentice’ right now if you — if you pitched him a reality show where he picks his running mate ‘Apprentice’-style, for the right amount of money, he would 100 percent do it.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (How Hot Is It? Edition)“Around 150 million Americans are expected to experience temperatures above 90 degrees this week, thanks to what they call a ‘heat dome.’ I always thought the heat dome was that weird helmet thing my grandma sat under at the hair salon.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“It’ll be so hot in Maine this week, the lobsters will be getting in pots just to cool down.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“It’s so hot in New York this week, the rats are wearing crop tops.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“It’s so hot in South Dakota, Kristi Noem’s dogs are shooting themselves.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“It’s so hot at Mar-a-Lago, Donald Trump asked Melania to be even colder to him.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Scientists warn heat waves will be longer, more intense and more frequent. So, good news for Mrs. Heat Wave.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Yep, this week, when you open the weather app, it just shows you the middle finger emoji.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingThe actress Hannah Einbinder told Jimmy Kimmel she was taking notes while appearing on his show to prepare for the late-night show theme on Season 4 of “Hacks.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightLupita Nyong’o, the star of “A Quiet Place: Day One,” will appear on Wednesday’s “Late Night.”Also, Check This OutIn April, Hozier reached No. 1 on the Hot 100 with the bouncy “Too Sweet,” becoming the first Irish artist since Sinead O’Connor to claim the top spot. He’s now on tour with a nine-piece band.Brian Karlsson for The New York TimesA decade after his breakout hit, “Take Me to Church,” the Irish singer-songwriter Hozier has found a new young fan base on TikTok. More

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      Late Night Latches Onto Donald Trump’s ‘Johnson’ Mix-Up

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      “The sad thing is under MAGA law, his name is now Ronny Johnson,” Jon Stewart said after Trump referred to his former doctor, Ronny Jackson, by the wrong name.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.The Wrong RonDuring a rally on Saturday, former President Donald Trump bragged about passing a cognitive exam before mistakenly referring to his White House doctor, Ronny Jackson, as “Ronny Johnson.”“The sad thing is under MAGA law, his name is now Ronny Johnson,” Jon Stewart said.“Do you know Ronny Johnson? Because Ronny Jackson is the name of the doctor.” — JIMMY FALLON“It’s not Ronny Johnson — it’s Jackson. If that was another cognitive test, you failed it, OK?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Bragging about acing a cognitive test while forgetting the name of the doctor who gave it to you is like writing on a résumé that you speak three languages and misspelling the word ‘languages.’” — SETH MEYERS[Imitating Trump] “I love Ronny Johnson. Doc Ronny — Doc Ronny Johnson. He gave me the test, then I went home to my beautiful wife, Malaria.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It’s like walking into a glass door after the doctor says you have 20/20 vision.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Milwaukee Edition)“Just weeks before he heads to the Republican National Convention in Milwaukee, he called Milwaukee ‘a horrible city,’ forcing liberals around the country to defend Milwaukee, a city they then had to pretend to have been to: ‘Oh, Milwaukee’s the finest city in, I want to say, Indiana.’” — JON STEWART“This man is about to be in a world of deep-fried hurt.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“And what a beautiful name, ‘Milwaukee.’ Some say it’s from the Algonquin for ‘the good land.’ Others say Milwaukee is Potawatomi for ‘cholesterol.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“I believe that if every city in America was destroyed tomorrow except Milwaukee, the republic would still roll on. Because Milwaukee is America. As Thomas Jefferson himself once said, ‘Schlemiel! Schlimazel! Hasenpfeffer Incorporated.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Trump’s team tried to defend the remarks, saying the former president wasn’t calling the whole city horrible, just crime in the city, with one aide saying, ‘He was directly referring to crime in Milwaukee.’ Now he does have a point. Milwaukee has become so soft on crime that their convention center is hosting a convicted felon.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingJimmy Fallon shared his “overwhelming” experience of meeting the pope at the Vatican on Monday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightHannah Einbinder will promote her new Max stand-up special, “Everything Must Go,” on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutThe family drama “Appropriate” became one of the season’s buzziest plays, partly because of Sarah Paulson’s star power.Sara Krulwich/The New York TimesSarah Paulson, an Emmy winner, won her first Tony on Sunday, taking home best actress in a play for her role in the family drama “Appropriate.” More

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      Late Night Recaps Donald Trump’s Return to Capitol Hill

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      “They always return to the scene of the crime,” Jimmy Kimmel said after the former president met with House Republicans on Thursday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.The Scene of the CrimeDonald Trump returned to Capitol Hill on Thursday, his first visit there since the Jan. 6 riot. House Republicans sang an early “Happy Birthday” for the former president, who turned 78 on Friday.“They always return to the scene of the crime,” Jimmy Kimmel joked.“Some Republicans who were in the room described the meeting as a ‘gripe-filled’ airing of legal and personal grievances. That sounds right.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The meeting itself, according to sources, took place at an undisclosed location, which means any of the five McDonald’s within a 10-minute radius of the Hill.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“One of the things he’s upset about, he talked about at this meeting, is Taylor Swift supporting Joe Biden. He said, ‘Why would she endorse this dope?’ And they were like, ‘I don’t know, why did we endorse this dope?’” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Trump’s Birthday Edition)“They sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to him? They’re not waiters at a TGI Fridays. Isn’t that embarrassing for everybody involved? A room of adults wearing suits saying, ‘Let’s discuss our agenda to dismantle the regulations that protect our environment, but, first, who’s the big boy getting a year older?’” — JORDAN KLEPPER“Seriously, do you people have no shame? It’s the guy’s first public visit since he sicced a mob on you and almost got you killed, and not only are you welcoming him back with open arms, you’re singing him ‘Happy Birthday’ a day before his birthday? This is like if all the teens at Crystal Lake got together to throw a surprise party for Jason: ‘We got you a new chain saw.’” — SETH MEYERS“And the worst part is that Ted Cruz sang it sexy like Marilyn Monroe.” — JORDAN KLEPPER“Trump’s birthday should be fun. The last time people gathered to say ‘Are you 1? Are you 2? Are you 3?’ they were counting guilty verdicts.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingThe singer and actress Maya Hawke discussed her third album, “Chaos Angel,” and her voice acting role as Anxiety in “Inside Out 2,” on Thursday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutEmilio Estevez, left, and Andrew McCarthy discuss the Brat Pack in “Brats,” a documentary directed by McCarthy.ABC News StudiosThe actor and director Andrew McCarthy examines his life and career as a member of the Brat Pack in his new documentary, “Brats.” More