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      Late Night Laments Donald Trump’s Sweeping Victory in Iowa

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      “Even though he barely spent any time in Iowa, it somehow made voters love him more,” Jimmy Kimmel said. “It’s the same strategy he used raising Eric and Don Jr.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Yuge’ in IowaThe Iowa caucuses took place on Monday, with former President Donald Trump winning 51 percent of the vote and finishing far ahead of his Republican opponents.“If you’ve ever wondered what is the polar opposite of M.L.K. Day, it is the Iowa Republican caucus,” Jimmy Kimmel joked on Tuesday.“Even though he barely spent any time in Iowa, it somehow made voters love him more. It’s the same strategy he used raising Eric and Don Jr.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trump won 98 of Iowa’s 99 counties. Apparently, the 99th county got confused and voted for ‘Succession.’” — JIMMY FALLON“But Trump got 51 percent of the vote in Iowa. And even though it doesn’t mean much — you know, in 2016, Ted Cruz won the Iowa caucus, and now he lives at the bottom of an aquarium.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Experts have been saying for months that Trump would win over 50 percent of the vote. These Iowa caucuses were the political version of ‘This could have been an email.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Arctic Blitz Edition)“You know, 80 percent of the country right now is in the grip of what they call an arctic blast, which is a very dangerous weather pattern not to be confused with arctic blitz, which is a wiper fluid-colored flavor of Gatorade.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The entire country is getting hit with an arctic blast. It is so cold, in Times Square the cooks over at Bubba Gump are warming their hands in the gumbo.” — JIMMY FALLON“Today, I tipped a kid who was shoveling outside 30 Rock, and he said, ‘Thanks, Mr. Fallon.’ I said, ‘No, thank you, Mr. Ramaswamy.’” — JIMMY FALLON“It’s so cold, Ron DeSantis is burning books just for the heat.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingNicki Minaj took “The Colbert Questionert” on Tuesday’s “Late Show.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightReneé Rapp, a star in the “Mean Girls” remake and this week’s “Saturday Night Live” musical guest, will sit down with Seth Meyers on Wednesday.Also, Check This OutJune Carter Cash, the subject of the documentary “June.”Don Hunstein/Sony Music Entertainment/Paramount+The filmmaker Kristen Vaurio leans on archival footage for “June,” her new documentary about the country music legend June Carter Cash. More

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      Late Night Finds Trump Incapable of Dealing With Facts

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      A judge initially denied Trump the chance to speak at his criminal fraud trial, “but, as 27 women can tell you, Trump doesn’t take no for an answer,” Stephen Colbert said on Thursday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Stick to the FactsFormer President Donald Trump’s civil fraud trial wrapped up on Thursday. The judge initially denied Trump’s request to speak during closing arguments.“But, as 27 women can tell you, Trump doesn’t take no for an answer,” Stephen Colbert said on Thursday.So when Trump’s lawyers tried one final time, the judge allowed Trump five minutes, so long as he stuck to the facts.“Yep, the judge let Trump speak on the condition that he stick to the law and facts, two things people on trial for fraud are famously great at.” — JIMMY FALLON“Before he allowed former President Trump to address the court today, Judge Arthur Engoron asked, ‘Do you promise to just comment on the facts and the law?’ Good luck. That’s like asking Jake, ‘Do you promise you won’t talk about State Farm?’” — SETH MEYERS“You’re not going to believe this: Trump said he did nothing wrong, and you know what? He’s never lied to us before, so.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“The judge overseeing his civil fraud trial today allowed former President Trump to speak for five minutes after his legal team finished their closing arguments, and now he’s facing 11 more counts of fraud.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Bye-Bye, Belichick Edition)“After 24 seasons as head coach, Bill Belichick is leaving the New England Patriots. Yep, even though Belichick is in his 70s, the job offers are already rolling in. Today, ABC asked him to be the next ‘Grizzled Bachelor.’” — JIMMY FALLON“I don’t know about you, but I’ll miss the way Bill Belichick’s smile lit up a room.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“My staff over here tells me that upon hearing the news, Patriots fans everywhere were absolutely deflated.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingOn Thursday’s “Late Show,” Colman Domingo spoke with Stephen Colbert about forging relationships with friends of Bayard Rustin to better portray the civil rights leader in the Netflix biopic, “Rustin.”Also, Check This OutWhen the producers of the new late-night show “After Midnight” asked Taylor Tomlinson why she wanted the hosting job, she said she told them, “I’m kind of lonely.”Chantal Anderson for The New York TimesLike another famous Taylor, the stand-up comedian and host of the soon-to-debut “After Midnight” Taylor Tomlinson is finding life can be lonely at the top. More

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      Stephen Colbert Prays That Trump Can Deliver

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      “That is a terrible idea, and please, Jesus, let it happen,” Colbert said of the former president’s initial desire to deliver his own closing argument in his fraud trial.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Give Him a ShotFormer President Donald Trump’s civil fraud trial is expected to come to a close on Thursday. Trump had intended to deliver part of the closing argument himself, but he backed down after refusing to abide by the judge’s restrictions, including that he not give “a campaign speech.”On Wednesday, Stephen Colbert noted that Trump had been saying “a lot of crazy stuff about this trial” and hoped he might “also say crazy stuff during the trial” for the late night host’s own amusement.“That is a terrible idea, and please, Jesus, let it happen.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Unfortunately, this afternoon, the judge rescinded permission for Trump to give his own closing argument. Boo! I knew Justice was blind; I didn’t know she was a buzzkill.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Don’t worry, as a comedian, I immediately filed an appeal: ‘Your honor, please, that would get us through February. I mean, come on. Think about our jobs.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Just the Two of Us Edition)“There’s nobody fun left to watch. It’s like a box of Lucky Charms without the marshmallows now.” — JIMMY KIMMEL, on Chris Christie’s dropping out of the presidential race on Wednesday“He made this tough decision after looking at the polls and realizing it was an easy decision.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Christie is not expected to make any endorsements at this time, but the timing of this decision indicates that he’s clearing the way for Nikki Haley to take all of his voter.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Of course, Chris Christie was the most high-profile and consistent critic of Trump still in the Republican primary — unlike Ron DeSantis, whose campaign slogan is ‘Ron DeSantis: Trump 2024.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Yep, it all comes down to this. After tonight, it’ll become clearer who will more not be the nominee.” — JIMMY FALLONWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber?  More

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      Late Night Recaps Donald Trump’s Latest Day in Court

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      Jimmy Fallon joked that Trump has so many trials that “at this point, the courtroom sketch artist doesn’t even draw him — she just traces the grooves in her desk.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘The Violent Overthrow of the Government One’Former President Donald Trump attended a court hearing in Washington, D.C., on Tuesday, where his lawyer argued for presidential immunity for what Stephen Colbert called “the violent overthrow of the government one.”Jimmy Fallon joked that Trump has been part of so many trials that “at this point, the courtroom sketch artist doesn’t even draw him — she just traces the grooves in her desk.”“Trump spends so much time in court, the sketch artists are running out of orange pastels.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trump is in court so often he enrolled in PreCheck so he can zip through security.” — JIMMY FALLON“During the hearing, Trump appeared visibly agitated and several times he abruptly became anxious and upset. Eventually, his lawyer handed him an iPad that was playing his favorite episode of ‘Bluey.’” — JIMMY FALLONOne judge pressed Trump’s lawyer on whether presidential immunity would extend to cases such as ordering special forces to kill a political rival.Jimmy Kimmel joked that Trump better lock the doors at Mar-a-Lago “because Bazooka Joe Biden has every reason to blow it to kingdom come.”“To recap: Trump’s lawyers are arguing that the president, who is currently Joe Biden, could order SEAL Team Six to assassinate his political rival, who is currently Donald Trump.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“So to recap — or to re-recap — Trump and his lawyers are arguing that the president ought to be able to murder his political opponents and then cannot be prosecuted unless he gets impeached. Our commander in chief has godlike powers over life and death as long as his party controls the Senate — and I just wanna say, please vote.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Missing Bolts Edition)“A man in Portland recently found a working iPhone along the side of a road that is believed to have been onboard the Alaskan Airlines plane that had a door plug blow off mid-flight. And, honestly, I’m not sure what’s scarier: having the door blow off your plane, or losing your phone.” — SETH MEYERS“The NTSB, or ‘nut-sub,’ has released its preliminary findings on the door popping off, announcing the panel on the plane may not have been properly attached. Ya think? It reminds me of the NTSB’s groundbreaking report on the Hindenburg: ‘Kaboom.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Now, the good news is that the bolts that should have held the door in place may not have come loose as was previously feared, OK? The bad news is that it’s possible the bolts were never even installed. Now, I know that sounds like a major screw-up, but they were just following the instructions: Put door on plane. Wonder why you have leftover bolts. Enjoy unlimited leg room.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Now, in response to this fiasco, the F.A.A. has grounded all 200 Boeing Max 9 planes in the United States, saying it could take four to eight hours to inspect each plane. Well, I think I speak for all travelers when I say take your time! OK? Do not rush. Be thorough. We’ll be at the Chili’s Too, pounding Spice-A-Ritas.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingSeth Meyers skewered his writers’ worst jokes of the new year in Tuesday night’s “Surprise Inspection” segment.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightReneé Rapp will promote her role as Regina George in the new musical movie version of “Mean Girls” on Wednesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutJane Curtin, Harriet Sansom Harris, Ben Kingsley and Jade Quon in the 2023 film “Jules,” directed by Marc Turtletaub.Linda Kallerus/Bleecker StreetFrom books to movies to art shows, aliens are having yet another pop culture moment. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Isn’t Expecting an Apology From Aaron Rodgers

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      Kimmel said although the N.F.L. star may believe that Kimmel is linked to Jeffrey Epstein, it’s more likely that Rodgers “is mad at me for making fun of his topknot.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Flag on the PlayOn his first show of the new year, Jimmy Kimmel addressed recent comments that the N.F.L. quarterback Aaron Rodgers made about him in connection with Jeffrey Epstein. During an appearance on ESPN’s “The Pat McAfee Show” last Tuesday, Rodgers insinuated that Kimmel was nervous about the publication of some court documents because they would reveal a link between Kimmel and Epstein.On Monday night, Kimmel said Rodgers might actually believe his “false and very damaging statements,” but that the more likely scenario is “he doesn’t actually believe that — he just said it because he’s mad at me for making fun of his topknot and his lies about being vaccinated.”Kimmel cited Rodgers’ “Thanksgiving Day Parade-sized ego” as part of the problem and said he wasn’t expecting an apology, but he did want to differentiate between the jokes made on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” and flat-out lies.“We say a lot of things on this show — we don’t make up lies. In fact, we have a team of people who work very hard to sift through the facts and reputable sources before I make a joke, and that’s an important distinction. A joke about someone — even when that someone is Donald Trump. Even a person who lies from the minute he wakes up until the minute he’s smearing orange makeup on his MyPillow at night — even he deserves that consideration, and we give it to him. Because the truth still matters, and when I do get something wrong, which happens on rare occasions, you know what I do? I apologize for it, which is what Aaron Rodgers should do, which is what a decent person would do. But I bet he won’t. If he does, you know what I’ll do? I’ll accept his apology and move on.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“But here’s the thing: I spent years doing sports. I’ve seen guys like him before. Aaron Rodgers has a very high opinion of himself. Because he had success on the football field, he believes himself to be an extraordinary being. He genuinely thinks that because God gave him the ability to throw a ball, he’s smarter than everyone else. The idea that his brain is just average is unfathomable to him.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“We learned during Covid somehow he knows more about science than scientists. A guy who went to community college then got into Cal on a football scholarship and didn’t graduate; someone who never spent a minute studying the human body is an expert in the field of immunology.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Aaron got two A’s on his report card — they were both in the word ‘Aaron,’ OK?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“They let him host ‘Jeopardy’ for two weeks, now he knows everything.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Revisionist History Edition)“Former U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley is facing criticism after she recently failed to cite slavery as the leading cause of the Civil War. Not only that, she’s facing a D in social studies.” — SETH MEYERS“Judges? Oh, no, I’m sorry. The answer we were looking for was ‘slavery.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Oh, yes, she had Black friends, but then they heard her opinion on what caused the Civil War.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Yes, slavery is the obvious answer to ‘What caused the Civil War?’ Just like ‘Donald Trump’ is the obvious answer to ‘What caused Civil War 2?’” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingOn Monday’s “Tonight Show,” the “America’s Got Talent” host Mel B shared her plans to commemorate the Spice Girls’ 30th anniversary with a postage stamp featuring her face.What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightThe pop star Dua Lipa will stop by Tuesday’s “Late Night,” one month after day drinking with Seth Meyers.Also, Check This OutPrince, bathed in purple light and rainy weather, performed at the Super Bowl in 2007.Doug MillsForty years after its release, Prince’s Oscar-winning rock musical film “Purple Rain” is being adapted for the stage. More

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      Colbert Cheers G.O.P. Chaos as Trump Banned From Colorado Ballot

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      Stephen Colbert likened the current state of the Republican primary to grocery “shopping carts that are shaped like cars so the kids can pretend they’re driving.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.What’s the Alternative?Despite former President Donald Trump potentially being off the primary ballot in Colorado for 2024, Republicans are still supporting his candidacy while other candidates compete to be runner-up.“Right now, the Republican primary is like when you go to the grocery store and they have those shopping carts that are shaped like cars so the kids can pretend they’re driving,” Stephen Colbert said on Thursday’s “Late Show.”“According to a new poll, 54 percent of Americans approve of Colorado kicking Trump off the ballot, including — including a shocking 24 percent of Republicans. But MAGA conservatives are officially P.O.’d about it, and some of them are seeking vengeance against the guy who did not do it, because Republicans are threatening to take Joe Biden off the ballot in states they control. Yes, they’re going to kick him off the ballot for the same constitutionally sound reason they’re impeaching him — I don’t know.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Of course, there’s no guarantee Trump’s even going to be the nominee. And there’s been a huge shake-up in the Republican primary because, according to the polls, Nikki Haley has surged into second place behind Trump in Iowa. Yaaass, queen! It is so important to show little girls out there that they, too, can never be president.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Winter Solstice Edition)“Well, everyone, today is officially the first day of winter, and it was also the shortest day of the year. Yeah, it was fun around 3 p.m. when you weren’t sure whether to take DayQuil or NyQuil.” — JIMMY FALLON“Happy winter solstice, everybody — unless you’ve got seasonal affective disorder, in which case, hang in there! Tomorrow is going to be three seconds longer.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“One popular solstice tradition is to dance around a bonfire, but I already did my drunken fire dance two nights ago when Colorado kicked Trump off the ballot.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingSeth Meyers revisited an old Playboy interview with Trump from 1990 for his last “A Closer Look” segment of 2023.Also, Check This OutAndrew Scott in “All of Us Strangers.”Chris Harris/Searchlight PicturesAndrew Scott plays a man alienated from himself and looking for answers in Andrew Haigh’s new film, “All of Us Strangers.” More

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      Jimmy Fallon Cheers Colorado for ‘Illegalizing’ Trump

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      Fallon joked that before the court ruling on Tuesday, “Trump thought ‘the insurrection clause’ was one of those Tim Allen movies on Disney+.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Banned in ColoradoColorado’s top court on Tuesday ruled that former President Donald Trump was disqualified from returning to office, banning him from its primary ballot based on Section 3 of the 14th Amendment, which disallows candidates who engage in insurrection against the Constitution.Jimmy Fallon joked about the timing of the news, saying, “Christmas is almost here, and people are already returning gifts. In fact, last night Colorado returned Donald Trump.”“You got to give it up for Colorado — they’re the first state to legalize weed and illegalize Trump.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, they banned him from the ballot. If Trump ends up winning in 2024, don’t be surprised if Colorado suddenly becomes East Utah.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, Colorado decided that Trump is disqualified from being president ’cause his role in the Jan. 6 attack violated the U.S. Constitution’s insurrection clause. Yep, before last night, Trump thought ‘the insurrection clause’ was one of those Tim Allen movies on Disney+.” — JIMMY FALLON“The insurrection clause is in the 14th Amendment, which was ratified in 1868. Right now, President Biden’s like, ‘I supported it then, and I support it now.’” — JIMMY FALLON“You go, Colorado. Just goes to show you can make good decisions when you’re high.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The reason the court kicked Trump off the ballot is the 14th Amendment’s so-called insurrection clause, which states that no one can hold an office of the United States if they ‘have engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof.’ The insurrection, in this case, is Jan. 6, and ‘aid and comfort to our enemies’ is his side hustle.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The Colorado Supreme Court ruled yesterday that former President Trump is ineligible to run again for president, while the Florida Supreme Court ruled he already won.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Paraphrasing Hitler Edition)“After facing comparisons to Adolf Hitler, former President Trump said yesterday that immigrants are destroying the blood of our country and added, ‘They said, “Oh, Hitler said that in a much different way.”’ But you’ve already lost the argument if you have to say, ‘Guys, I wasn’t quoting Hitler — I was paraphrasing him.’” — SETH MEYERS“That’s right, after facing comparisons to Adolf Hitler, Trump said that immigrants are destroying the blood of our country and added, ‘I’ve never read “Mein Kampf.”’ Yeah, no one thought you had. I’d be surprised if you read ‘The Art of the Deal.’” — SETH MEYERS“[imitating Trump] Everyone is saying that I’ve read ‘Mein Kampf,’ but that is a lie: I reached the same conclusions as Hitler independently. And while I’ve got your attention — folks, hold on — while I’ve got your attention, and I’m just spitballin’ here, what say we invade Poland?” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingLiam Neeson narrated what Stephen Colbert called “the new animated classic,” “The Indict-Mare Before Christmas,” on Wednesday’s “Late Show.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightAmy Poehler will catch up with her former “Saturday Night Live” castmate Seth Meyers on Thursday’s “Late Night.”Also, Check This OutWhatever potential acting work Matt Bomer may have lost by coming out, he said, “Love is more important to me than anything that being my true self cost me.”Sabrina Santiago for The New York TimesThe openly gay actor Matt Bomer is defying expectations with spotlight roles in projects like “Fellow Travelers” and “Maestro.” More

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      Stephen Colbert Is OK With Kicking Rudy Giuliani While He’s Down

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      Colbert chided Giuliani after two former Georgia election workers won a $148 million judgment against him, then sued him again a few days later.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Kick Him While He’s DownTwo former Georgia election workers who were awarded $148 million after being defamed by Rudolph W. Giuliani sued him again on Monday after he continued to attack them.“Now, normally, I’d say don’t kick a man while he’s down, but in Rudy’s case, go for it,” Stephen Colbert said. “It’s much easier when he’s down there — he’s closer to your feet.”“After this enormous punishment for the damage he caused by lying continually about these two innocent women, I’m sure he’s learned his lesson — and he continues to repeat his false allegations the poll watchers interfered in the 2020 election. He’s done it outside the courthouse, on Newsmax, and on Steve Bannon’s podcast. He says it everywhere he goes. He even said it to his current roommates, two sea gulls on South Street Seaport.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“The two Georgia election workers who won a $148 million verdict on Friday against Rudy Giuliani filed another lawsuit yesterday after Giuliani continued making false statements about them. Only Rudy could lose a $148 million lawsuit and say, ‘OK, double or nothing!’” — SETH MEYERS“Obviously, he needs money fast. I recommend he drill for oil in his skull.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (You Make Me Feel So Young Edition)“According to a new report, President Biden frequently tells aides and friends in private conversations that he feels ‘so much younger’ than his age. And I’m sure he does, but it doesn’t inspire a ton of confidence when you walk around going ‘Man, I feel 73!’” — SETH MEYERS“Yes, his campaign staff is worried when he overextends himself by working long hours or riding a bike or nodding too hard, excessive blinking.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Well, good for you, sir! You don’t look one day over — let’s change the subject. What were we talking about? I don’t remember.’” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingBradley Cooper could barely get through a story about his 30th high school reunion while laughing with Jimmy Fallon on Tuesday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightNicki Minaj will promote her new album, “Pink Friday 2,” on Wednesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutA reading party in Brooklyn. Lila Barth for The New York TimesReading Rhythms isn’t a book club — it’s a reading party held regularly in parks, bars, and on rooftops. More