The Daily Show with Trevor Noah (TV Program)

Subterms

    More stories

    • 75 Shares159 Views

      in Television

      Late Night Processes Donald Trump’s Re-Election

      by

      “Trump returning to the White House is a huge historic comeback for someone who literally never went away,” Jimmy Fallon said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Infernal FlameLate-night hosts spent Wednesday processing the 2024 election results and former President Donald Trump’s sweeping win.On “The Daily Show,” Desi Lydic lamented that “instead of breaking the glass ceiling, last night America decided to get back with her dirtbag ex.”“Yep, it’s official. America elected its first criminal president before electing its first female president. What a day for proud felonists.” — DESI LYDIC“We’ve had two qualified, accomplished women nominated for president, and both times they lost to the worst man in the whole country.” — DESI LYDIC“Yup, Trump could be the first president to be under White House arrest.” — JIMMY FALLON“All day yesterday, I was walking around proudly wearing my ‘I voted’ sticker. Today, I wore my ‘I am questioning my fundamental belief in the goodness of humanity’ sticker.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Now, as a late-night host, people often say to me, ‘Come on, part of you has got to want Trump to win because he gives you so much material to work with.’ No, no. No one tells the guy who cleans the bathroom, ‘Wow, you must love it when someone has explosive diarrhea — there’s so much material for you to work with!’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“I guess this election wasn’t rigged. That’s weird, though, right? I mean, he said it would be rigged. He said it was being rigged while people were in line voting. Isn’t it remarkable that this time, the fix wasn’t in? Last time, the Democrats cheated. This time, we chose not to, I guess.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Donald Trump is like the emperor from ‘Star Wars.’ He’s old, he’s evil and he keeps coming back with no reasonable explanation whatsoever.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (Four More Years Edition)“Let me tell you, that was the worst Taco Tuesday of my whole life.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trump returning to the White House is a huge historic comeback for someone who literally never went away.” — JIMMY FALLONWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

    • 125 Shares149 Views

      in Television

      Jon Stewart Tries to Find Good News on Election Night

      by

      “Look at all the little glass-half-fulls out there,” Stewart said as his “Daily Show” audience applauded a Democratic Senate victory in Maryland.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Put on a Happy Face“The Daily Show” went live for election night on Tuesday with “Indecision 2024: Nothing We Can Do About It Now.” (The other shows took the night off.) As the night kept looking better for former President Donald J. Trump, Jon Stewart tried to “find some positivity and some good news” to report.“We are obviously digging through the results to find some that you like because you were nice enough to come here, and I’m just going to come here and [expletive] all over you?” Stewart said. “No, I’m not going to do that.”Stewart managed to find that good news in places like Maryland, where Angela Alsobrooks, a Democrat, defeated former Gov. Larry Hogan to keep a Senate seat. As the audience enthusiastically applauded, Stewart said, “Look at all the little glass-half-fulls out there.”“It appears to be down to the ‘blue wall’ states that haven’t been called yet, but we do have some good news that we found here: District of Columbia is being called for Kamala Harris, ladies and gentlemen! And, to be clear, that was through voting, not insurrection.” — JON STEWART“I have one result for you, and please understand if you’re watching at home, I’m only giving results of places I can drive to. So we do have the spinoffs for New York — Kamala Harris has won New York!” — JON STEWARTWith Senator John Fetterman of Pennsylvania pulling out of a scheduled interview, and with little more good news to offer by the end of the show, Stewart tried to leave on a positive note.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

    • 88 Shares179 Views

      in Television

      Late Night Addresses Your Election Eve Anxiety

      by

      “It feels like the whole country is waiting to get the results of a biopsy,” Jimmy Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Performance AnxietyThe late-night hosts seem to be as anxious about the election as you are.“It feels like the whole country is waiting to get the results of a biopsy,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Monday.“These polls — they’re mood rings. That’s all they are. They bring you up, they bring you down. Poll is short for ‘bipolar.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Tomorrow is Election Day and ‘Late Night’ is officially endorsing Xanax 0.5 milligram, twice a day as needed.” — SETH MEYERSOn “Real Time” on Friday, Bill Maher made one last appeal to undecided voters, or as he called them, “the Christmas Eve shoppers of politics — they know the big day is coming, but they just can’t get themselves to do anything about it until the last minute.”“The phrase I hear so much that makes me just want to un-alive myself is, ‘How’s she going to help me?’ Like the president is your personal genie. It’s Kamala, not ‘Kazam.’” — BILL MAHER“And so, dear Christmas Eve voter, I say to you: Things aren’t that bad, but they might get a hell of a lot worse under the rule of a mad king. Do I love everything about Kamala? No. Who told you you get to love everything? Do I wish she came up with a better reason to be president than ‘I’m not Trump’? Yeah, it would have been very helpful. But let’s not forget, ‘I’m not Trump’ is still a really great reason.” — BILL MAHER“But things look so good for Trump, Democrats have already impeached him.” — GREG GUTFELD“The Harris campaign is cautioning against getting too excited. Too late! I have to be excited because I’ve only got two other choices: absolute terror or Absolut vodka.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“If you see someone in the fetal position drenched in sweat, they either just ran the New York City Marathon or they’re waiting for tomorrow’s election.” — JIMMY FALLON“Look, I love this country. I’m an immigrant — I chose to be here. In the words of the late Lee Greenwood, I’m proud to be an American. And I’d argue there is nothing more American than having a healthy adversarial relationship with those in power, even if you voted for them.” — JOHN OLIVERWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

    • 88 Shares119 Views

      in Television

      Jimmy Kimmel Trashes Trump’s ‘Cosplay Garbage Man’

      by

      Kimmel said that when Trump delivered a speech while wearing an orange safety vest, it was “like a 4-year-old who wants to wear his costume to school.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Trump as Trash ManOn Wednesday, former President Donald Trump spoke to reporters from inside a garbage truck while wearing an orange safety vest.Jimmy Kimmel called Trump “a cosplay garbage man” on Thursday, joking that “the garbage is driving the truck.”“That vest will come in handy when he’s on the side of the highway picking up trash with the other inmates.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“And then this lunatic decides to stay in the garbage costume for the whole duration of his speech, like a 4-year-old who wants to wear his costume to school.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I have to say; if there is a single image that we will look back on and say, this defines what America was going through in 2024, I think it will be the Republican nominee for president dancing to the song ‘Y.M.C.A.’ in a garbage man costume.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Donald Trump could never make it as a sanitation worker. It’s a tough job with actual stakes, genuine responsibilities, and no amount of cosplaying can make up for the fact that he’d be really bad at it. He wouldn’t last a day. If Trump was a sanitation worker in New York City, we’d have garbage piled higher than the Empire State Building, as opposed to what we currently have, which is only half as tall.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Last-Minute Costume Idea Edition)We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

    • 138 Shares119 Views

      in Television

      Kimmel and More Late Night Hosts Mock Trump’s Garbage Truck Stunt

      by

      The comment shocked “everyone who couldn’t believe Joe successfully logged onto Zoom,” the guest host of “Gutfeld” said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘We Are Garbage!’President Biden came under fire this week after seemingly referring to Trump supporters as “garbage” during a Zoom call. (In a posting on social media, Mr. Biden said he was talking about racist language, not Trump supporters.)On Wednesday, Jimmy Kimmel said that he didn’t blame the Trump campaign for jumping “all over this garbage thing.”“It’s not a smart thing to say,” Kimmel said. “Joe Biden should drop out of this race immediately.”“Today Kamala Harris was like, ‘Can someone drop Joe in a corn maze and leave him there till Wednesday, just have him wander?’”— JIMMY FALLON“Now, obviously, what he meant to say was nothing. Why are you saying anything? Did you forget that you’re so bad at saying things we had to go get somebody else?” — SETH MEYERS“Shocking everyone who couldn’t believe Joe successfully logged onto Zoom.” — TOM SHILLUE, guest host of “Gutfeld”“This happened during Trump’s rally, and fortunately, someone was there to help boost Marco Rubio up onto the stage so he could frantically share this important news.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“He’s like an excited little Minion bringing big news to Gru: It’s like ‘Mr. President! Stop the proceedings! I’ve got a bulletin!’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“And if you thought that was insulting, wait until those people hear what you said about Donald Trump.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Look how excited Rubio is: ‘Everybody, everybody, everybody! I have great news: We are garbage!’” — RONNY CHIENG“Celebrate good times, come on! I mean, Rubio delivered that news like he was announcing the war is over.” — RONNY CHIENG“And you can tell how excited Trump is because his face is at full orange alert.” — RONNY CHIENGThe Punchiest Punchlines (Mookie Edition)“At the World Series last night, two Yankees fans tried to pry a foul ball out of the glove of Dodgers right fielder Mookie Betts. I’ve got to be honest, it’s nice to see New York fans try to steal something besides a wallet.” — TOM SHILLUE“On the bright side, they were offered season tickets by the Phillies.” — SETH MEYERS“It’s Mookie versus the mooks.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“They call that the Staten Island handshake.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Bits Worth WatchingSalma Hayek showed Jimmy Fallon how to dance with a snake circling his neck on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightConnie Chung, a veteran journalist, will discuss her new memoir on Thursday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutLili Taylor, left, with Annabella Sciorra in “The Addiction.”Fast Films, Inc.The subscription streaming service Arrow has several spooky film options for a horror-filled Halloween. More

    • 138 Shares189 Views

      in Television

      Jon Stewart Fears Madison Square Garden Will Never Be the Same

      by

      After Donald Trump’s rally, Stewart showed an image of Billy Joel and asked, “How dare they desecrate the stage that the Piano Man has consecrated?”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘The Clueless Klux Klan’On Monday’s “Daily Show,” Jon Stewart showed a montage of speakers from the weekend’s Trump rally at Madison Square Garden, including those who called Kamala Harris the devil and the Antichrist and said she had “pimp handlers.” Tucker Carlson called her “Samoan-Malaysian-low-I.Q.” and issued a high-pitched cackle.“Now, generally, that’s a lineup that you see outside Madison Square Garden yelling at strangers as they try to get inside Madison Square Garden,” Stewart said.“And let me just say, how dare they desecrate the stage that the Piano Man has consecrated?” — JON STEWART, showing an image of Billy Joel“Former President Trump held a rally yesterday at Madison Square Garden in front of a crowd of 20,000 people, and it was the most vitriolic, rage-filled group of white people in that building since the last Rangers game.” — SETH MEYERS“Everyone was on the edge of their seat waiting for the Menendez brothers to come out.” — JIMMY FALLON“The Clueless Klux Klan showed up in force for what I think may have been the nuttiest Trump event of all time.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Trump’s rally was described as unhinged, crude and racist — as opposed to the stable, polite and tolerant Trump rallies we’re accustomed to.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Hulkster Edition)“That is just sad, to see an old man like that. We’ve all had that moment, when you have to look at your grandpa and say, ‘Peepaw, it’s just not safe anymore. We’re going to have to take away the keys to your shirt.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT, after showing a clip of Hulk Hogan struggling to tear his shirt off at the Trump rally“You know you’re getting old when you lose a wrestling match to your tank top.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I warned him not to wear the Beefy T, but nobody listens.” — JIMMY KIMMELWe are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

    • 88 Shares169 Views

      in Television

      Late Night Condemns Trump for Stanning Hitler

      by

      On Wednesday, Seth Meyers said he was “starting to think Trump doesn’t watch the ends of documentaries.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Mein Bad’Donald Trump’s longest-serving chief of staff, John Kelly, said the former president had said more than once while in office that Adolf Hitler “did some good things.”On Wednesday, Seth Meyers said he was “starting to think Trump doesn’t watch the ends of documentaries.”“Once you have to explain to someone that Hitler is bad, there’s not much else to talk about. You don’t see many first dates survive that.” — SETH MEYERS“Seriously, Trump, Hitler never did anything good. He even sucked at waving. Like, dude, God gave you elbows — use them.” — MICHAEL KOSTA“I don’t even think you have to know history. You can probably get all the info you need from Mel Brooks movies and Bugs Bunny cartoons.” — SETH MEYERS“This is the first election where reporters have to ask, ‘Who’d you root for when you watched ‘Saving Private Ryan’?” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump made it worse today when he said, ‘Oops, mein bad.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Lose Yourself Edition)“At a campaign event in Detroit, Eminem introduced Barack Obama. Which makes sense, they both made a career out of pretending to be Black.” — GREG GUTFELD“You know, somewhere, Trump is yelling at his aides: [imitating Trump] ‘How could M&Ms betray me? I don’t understand. Is there no loyalty?’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“But it’s nice to see Obama pay homage to Eminem because it means that Black people have finally accepted that Eminem is the greatest rapper of all time. And look — no, stop — I know how it feels. I went through it every time Tiger Woods won a golf tournament, OK?” — MICHAEL KOSTA“Was that song Osama bin Laden? Because Obama killed it.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“I will say, maybe Obama should skip that line about ‘dropping bombs,’ you know? Are you still rapping, or are you doing a drone strike?” — MICHAEL KOSTAThe Bits Worth WatchingMembers of the New York Liberty joined Jimmy Fallon for a team selfie celebrating their WNBA championship on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightJulia Louis-Dreyfus will take “The Colbert Questionert” on Thursday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutThe gang’s all here for the sixth and final season of “What We Do in the Shadows.”Russ Martin/FXThe vampire comedy series “What We Do in the Shadows” returned for its sixth and final season on FX and Hulu this week. More

    • 125 Shares199 Views

      in Television

      Michael Kosta Thinks He’s Found Elon Musk’s Next Failed Purchase

      by

      The “Daily Show” host said Musk “bought Twitter just to drive it into the ground” and is now considering doing the same for America.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.How Low Can You Go?Elon Musk, who’s so excited to support Donald Trump that he jumped up and down to show it, said on Saturday that he’d give $1 million per day to a randomly chosen registered Pennsylvania voter who signs an online petition.On Tuesday’s “Daily Show,” Michael Kosta called Musk “a man of gravitas, a man of dignity, a man with roughly a four-inch vertical leap” and wondered, “How exactly does this bribe — sorry, gift — work?”“Wow, Elon’s giving a million dollars to his fans. Now they can afford the best anime girlfriend pillow money can buy.” — MICHAEL KOSTA“He’s so rich, he bought Twitter just to drive it into the ground for his own personal pleasure, and now he’s thinking, ‘Well, what if I did the same with America?’” — MICHAEL KOSTA“I know what you’re thinking right now: How could Republicans sink so low? And also, can I sink low enough to register for this?’” — MICHAEL KOSTA“During his first solo campaign event in support of former President Trump last week, Elon Musk urged the crowd to ‘pester’ their friends and family who are not yet registered to vote, adding, ‘I would if I had either of those.’” — SETH MEYERSA Tale of Two Town HallsOn his Fox News show on Tuesday, Greg Gutfeld had harsh words for Kamala Harris, saying her Monday night town hall in Michigan “had all the spontaneity of synchronized swimming.”“So right off the bat, we got the lay of the land — another manicured platform for Kamala to blurt out her now legendary word salads. I mean, this broad ought to come to every event with a side of ranch and a bag of croutons.” — GREG GUTFELDOn “The Tonight Show,” Jimmy Fallon noted that Trump had canceled a Tuesday event that would have been titled “Make America Healthy Again.”“Tough to make America healthy again when you were just making them French fries a day ago,” Fallon joked, referring to the ex-president’s campaign appearance behind a McDonald’s counter.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More