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      Late Night Has Fun With Trump’s Missing Phone Records

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      “The only time there should be a seven-hour gap is when you’re trying to remember what happened on St. Patrick’s Day,” Jimmy Fallon said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Scam Likely’The House committee investigating the events of Jan. 6, 2021, reported a seven-hour gap in President Donald J. Trump’s phone records, including the time of the Capitol riot.“Seven hours. I don’t know if anyone else is a fan of the show ‘Dateline,’ but if your phone records are missing even 10 minutes, you’re guilty,” Jimmy Fallon said.“I’m sure he was just busy volunteering somewhere, I mean, or maybe working on his watercolors, could be any of that.” — JAMES CORDEN“Even the ghost of Richard Nixon is like, ‘I don’t think you can do that.’” — JIMMY FALLON“The only time there should be a seven-hour gap is when you’re trying to remember what happened on St. Patrick’s Day.” — JIMMY FALLON“Instead, for all of those hours, all the White House phone records just say, ‘Scam likely.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“This is the thing with Trump — you never know. You never know if he’s more evil or lazy. He could have been plotting the overthrow of the government, or he could have been watching Fox News in the bath — you just don’t know!” — JAMES CORDENThe Punchiest Punchlines (Burner Edition)“And now after making the discovery, the House committee is investigating whether Trump used burner phones. It’s always reassuring when a president acts like a character in ‘The Wire.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Trump denied it, saying, ‘I’ve never had a burner phone. I’ve had a couple of burner wives, but no burner phones.’” — JAMES CORDEN“So now the big question is, which White House toilet did he flush them down?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I wouldn’t be surprised. I mean, he already has a burner son.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingJason Alexander starred in “Jeff Bezos: The Musical” on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightHasan Minhaj will appear on Wednesday’s “Tonight Show.”Also, Check This OutDaddy Yankee helped take reggaeton worldwide. He has said his March album, “Legendaddy,” will be his last.Greg Doherty/Getty ImagesThe reggaeton star Daddy Yankee announced his retirement after dropping his last album, “Legendaddy.” More

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      Late Night Approves of Ketanji Brown Jackson’s High Ratings

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      A poll found strong support for the judge’s Supreme Court nomination, but “speechmaking and hissy-fitting” continued in the Senate, said Jimmy Kimmel.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Upon ApprovalWednesday was the final day of questions for the Supreme Court nominee Ketanji Brown Jackson, or, as Jimmy Kimmel referred to it, “another day of grandstanding, speechmaking and hissy-fitting in the Senate.”A newly released poll, conducted before the hearings began, found that 58 percent of Americans supported Judge Jackson’s appointment to the court.“It is the most support a Jackson has had since ‘Thriller’ came out.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Right now, Biden’s like, ‘Hey, I nominated you — it’s only fair that we split that approval rating, come on.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, the only way it could have been higher is if she ended today with a water bottle flip.” — JIMMY FALLON“She said the fact that she was even nominated shows how far we’ve come as a country, and so some of the Republican senators on the committee have been hard at work to show how far we haven’t.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“This is how low the United States government has fallen. We’ve gone from ‘Let’s put a man on the moon within the decade’ to ‘Maybe someday we can get at least one Republican to vote for a qualified woman.’” — JAMES CORDENThe Punchiest Punchlines (Uninvited Edition)“In other news, despite the current state of affairs, Vladimir Putin is still planning to attend the G20 summit with other world leaders in Bali this fall — which explains this year’s theme: ‘Awkward.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Seriously, what is he doing? It’s like getting kicked out of high school and then showing up for the reunion.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, it’ll backfire on Putin when he realizes it’s not a G20 summit; it’s an intervention.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth Watching“The Late Late Show” celebrated Reggie Watts’s 50th birthday by giving him a racecar bed.What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightGwen Stefani will pop by Thursday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutThe artists Mónica Arreola, left, and Andrew Roberts, selected for the Whitney Museum of American Art’s 2022 Biennial, titled “Quiet as It’s Kept,” at the graffitied border wall in Tijuana.Alejandro Cossio for The New York TimesThe curators of this year’s Whitney Biennial expanded their reach to include Mexican perspectives on the border. More

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      Late Night Sees Through Republican Questions for Ketanji Brown Jackson

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      “It’s funny listening to the same people who let the president get away with trying to overthrow the government call anyone ‘soft on crime,’ but that’s how it goes,” Jimmy Kimmel said.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Soft SpotsJudge Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearings continued on Tuesday, and late-night hosts couldn’t help but notice how Republicans made their biases clear.“I think your dog whistle’s busted, guys. Everyone can hear it now!” Jimmy Kimmel said.“Today was the first of two days where senators can ask the nominee direct questions, so Democrats asked things like ‘Why are you so great?’ and Republicans asked things like ‘Why aren’t you Donald Trump?’” — JAMES CORDEN“But despite the gratuitous attacks, Judge Jackson has been very cool under pressure. They don’t have anything real to criticize, so they’ve been trying to portray her as being soft on crime, which is interesting because she’s been endorsed by both the International Association of Police Chiefs and the Fraternal Order of Police — and the band The Police. Even Sting is in her corner.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“How soft are Republicans talking here, do we think? Like, ‘not handing out maximum sentences’ levels of soft or, you know, ‘deciding to look the other way after Jan. 6’ levels of soft?” — JAMES CORDEN“It’s funny listening to the same people who let the president get away with trying to overthrow the government call anyone ‘soft on crime,’ but that’s how it goes.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (More K.B.J. Edition)“Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson made an opening statement yesterday, got praise from both sides of the aisle. Republican Senator Chuck Grassley said he liked it and his wife liked it, too. Judge Jackson got the coveted Barbara Grassley seal of approval.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“But not every Republican was impressed. Senators Marsha Blackburn and Josh Hawley were like, ‘You lost us at Ketanji.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Yep, these hearings are never really fun, but then again there’s always a paper crinkle to really liven things up.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingSavannah Guthrie and Hoda Kotb surprised Jimmy Fallon with a performance of “Take Me Home, Country Roads” on Tuesday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightSandra Bullock and Channing Tatum, “The Lost City” co-stars, will appear on Wednesday’s “Late Late Show.”Also, Check This OutPerformers at the “Bridgerton” ball, which will travel to Washington, Chicago and Montreal after its Los Angeles run.Maggie Shannon for The New York Times“Bridgerton” fans can enjoy a royal ball straight out of their favorite Netflix series. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel Ribs Republicans Over Ketanji Brown Jackson

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      Kimmel said Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearings could make the G.O.P.’s worst nightmare could come true: “Having this decided by two Black women whose names they can’t pronounce.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘Subtle Racism Jamboree’Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearings kicked off in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee on Monday.Jimmy Kimmel joked that the hearings “give a number of our Republican senators a chance to compete in one of their favorite events: the subtle racism jamboree.”“She doesn’t need any Republican votes to get confirmed because the vice president is the tiebreaker, which would be — that would be the G.O.P.’s ultimate nightmare: having this decided by two Black women whose names they can’t pronounce.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“I actually think they should treat Ketanji Brown Jackson exactly like they treated Brett Kavanaugh: Interview every single person who has accused her of sexual assault. Don’t stop, even though there are none. Do not stop.” — JIMMY KIMMELThe Punchiest Punchlines (K.B.J. Edition)“Well, guys, today confirmation hearings began for Supreme Court nominee Ketanji Brown Jackson. The hearing process will last four days. It’s basically C-SPAN’s version of Coachella.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, Jackson will face days of tough questions. Brett Kavanaugh was like [imitating Kavanaugh slurring]: ‘It’ll be fine. I did it for four days after the second day, after the s — after the second day, it’s kind of a blur.’” — JIMMY FALLON“I saw that top Republican leading the hearings, Chuck Grassley, is 88 years old. Wow. When it was his turn to speak he was like, ‘Tell us who you are, and then tell me who I am.’” — JIMMY FALLON“But this is cool: I saw that Judge Jackson’s parents were at the confirmation hearing. Even crazier, so were Chuck Grassley’s.” — JIMMY FALLON“The next two days are for questions, and I think it’s going to be a huge missed opportunity if one of the judiciary committee members doesn’t start a question with ‘I’m sorry, Miss Jackson, ooh? I am for real — what is your judicial stance on federal financial oversight?’” — JAMES CORDEN, riffing on Outkast’s song, “Ms. Jackson”The Bits Worth WatchingJimmy Fallon and Questlove played a game of Charades with Leslie Mann and Mikey Day, the host of “Is It Cake?” on Monday’s “Tonight Show.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightJamie Lee Curtis will pop by Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutSharon Stone in the interrogation scene in “Basic Instinct,” which opened on March 20, 1992.Rialto PicturesThe erotic thriller “Basic Instinct” is still a hit 30 years after its highly contested premiere. More

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      Late Night Casts Doubt on the Russian-Ukrainian Peace Talks

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      Trevor Noah warned viewers not to get their hopes up: “Not only did Russia not agree to end the war; it wouldn’t even admit that it started a war.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Give Peace a Fighting ChanceRussia and Ukraine held their highest-level peace talks on Thursday since the war began.“But please do not get your hopes up,” Trevor Noah said. “Not only did Russia not agree to end the war; it wouldn’t even admit that it started a war.”“They met in Turkey. Isn’t it just nice to see Russia going somewhere where they’re actually invited?” — JAMES CORDEN“Yeah, Russia’s foreign minister, Sergey Lavrov, was asked if they planned to invade any other countries, and his answer was, ‘We are not planning to attack other countries, and we did not attack Ukraine,’ which is obviously a lie, and also not reassuring for the rest of Europe.” — TREVOR NOAH“And, by the way, if Lavrov is denying that Russia is attacking Ukraine, then what’s he attending peace talks for? What, he wants Ukraine to stop blowing up Russian missiles with their maternity wards?” — TREVOR NOAH“I can’t even imagine how strange these meetings must be. It’d be like trying to have a conversation with someone who’s actively setting your house on fire.” — JAMES CORDEN“Do they get there and there’s small talk before they get into it: ‘Ah, yeah, that Russell Wilson trade is crazy. Anyway, we would love it if we could, you know, pump the brakes on the whole invasion thing.’” — JAMES CORDENThe Punchiest Punchlines (Parachuting Spiders Edition)“Apparently, there’s some spider invasion coming to the East Coast in the spring. Oh yeah, and scientists say they’re that the size of a child’s hand, and they can parachute from the sky. I love how scientists were like, ‘How should we describe the size?’ and they’re like, ‘Oh, I settled on a child’s hand.”’ — JIMMY FALLON“You know, sometimes I don’t understand nature. Why did it feel the need to create something like this, huh? Spiders that have parachutes and fly around? You know, with some things, you get why they exist, like how plants put oxygen into the atmosphere, and how birds evolve into chickens so we could make delicious sandwiches. But giant spiders? Was Mother Nature like, ‘People’s nightmares have become too boring; let’s spice things up’?” — TREVOR NOAH“You can’t even kill that thing with a regular shoe. Did you see the size? You probably need like a Shaq-sized shoe.” — TREVOR NOAH“And, by the way, if you think a giant spider is bad, wait until we see the giant pig the giant spider is gonna become best friends with.” — TREVOR NOAHThe Bits Worth WatchingDenzel Washington sat down with the Bodega Boys on “Desus & Mero.”Also, Check This OutFrom left, Georgina Campbell, Graham Dickson, Tom Stourton, Antonia Clarke and Joshua McGuire in “All My Friends Hate Me.”Super Ltd Things turn nasty when a peculiar stranger infiltrates a reunion of college pals in the new horror-comedy “All My Friends Hate Me.” More

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      Jimmy Fallon Rags on America’s Gas Problem

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      “Gas prices are so high, the Indy 500 was just changed to the Indy 5,” Fallon joked.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.How High?President Biden announced a ban of imported Russian oil, gas and coal on Tuesday. The move prompted fears of higher prices at the pump.“Yeah, this is devastating for Russia,” Jimmy Fallon said. “Now their biggest export is bad guys in ‘John Wick’ movies.”“Of course, we’ve got to get oil from somewhere else, which is why today, Biden looked at Rudy Giuliani and was like, ‘Let’s get you in the sauna, buddy.’” — JIMMY FALLON“And luckily America produces a lot of its own oil. There’s Texas, there’s Alaska, there’s Rudy Giuliani, but it’s still not enough.” — TREVOR NOAH“Like, if this keeps up, the next ‘Fast and Furious’ movie will take place on public transportation.” — TREVOR NOAH“That’s right, gas prices were already on the rise, and with the decision to ban Russian oil, they’re higher than ever before. Gas prices are so high, the Indy 500 was just changed to the Indy 5.” — JIMMY FALLON“Gas prices are so high, this morning, parents were like: ‘All right, kids, we’re Amish now. Let’s get in the buggy — we’re taking the horse to school.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Gas prices are so high, Americans are just filling their cars with Red Bull and hoping for the best.” — JIMMY FALLON“But on the bright side, this is the perfect excuse to pretend you’re going to get back on the bike you bought mid-pandemic and rode twice.” — JAMES CORDENThe Punchiest Punchlines (Unhappy Meals Edition)“Meanwhile, in the battle, McDonald’s and Starbucks are cutting ties with Russia, both announcing they would temporarily close all locations in the country. No Starbucks, no McDonald’s — that’s a sad life to live. And no pick-me-up in the morning, no Happy Meals — or, as they call them in Russia, meals.” — TREVOR NOAH“Yeah, we don’t want their oil and they can’t have our grease.” — JIMMY FALLON“McDonald’s in Russia is a little strange. It’s the only country that sells unhappy meals.” — JIMMY FALLON“Not to be outdone, Arby’s announced that they are punishing Russia by staying open.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yes. Russia just became a ‘no fry zone.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Some people go for the jugular. America? They go for the McRib.” — JAMES CORDENThe Bits Worth WatchingDina Gusovsky, a writer for “Late Night With Seth Meyers,” delivered a monologue about reconciling her Russian heritage during the Vladimir Putin era.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightDolly Parton will pop by Wednesday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This OutAt the 2019 “Peaky Blinders” Festival, actors recreated scenes from the show on the streets of Birmingham, England.PA Images, via ReutersThe final season of the crime drama “Peaky Blinders” is currently airing in Britain, where some superfans are staging re-enactments in public. More

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      Seth Meyers Skewers Trump for a ‘Looney’ Idea on Russia

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      Meyers said the former president’s suggestion that the U.S. paint Chinese flags on planes and bomb Russia was “a slightly stupider version of Bugs Bunny dressing up as a sexy lady to distract Elmer Fudd.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Flag FooleryAt a Republican fund-raiser on Saturday, Donald Trump suggested that the U.S. should paint Chinese flags on F-22 jets and bomb Russia.“Look, we came very close, very close to a world where Trump was still in charge during Russia’s brutal and illegal invasion of Ukraine, which is scary for many reasons,” Seth Meyers said on Monday. “One of which is Trump keeps giving us a glimpse as to how he would have responded, and, as usual, he has that unique Trump blend of being both terrifying and incredibly stupid at the same time.”“Finally, a way to bring stability to the world — a war between Russia and China.” — SETH MEYERS“So, if you’re wondering what Trump has been up to lately, the answer is huffing glue.” — JIMMY FALLON“These are the types of ideas you come up with after you stare at the sun too long.” — JIMMY FALLON“Then Trump said that he would stop Russian tanks by painting a tunnel on the side of a mountain so they slam into it. [Imitating Trump] ‘Meep meep.’” — JIMMY FALLON“He definitely gets his ideas from cartoons. I mean, this is a slightly stupider version of Bugs Bunny dressing up as a sexy lady to distract Elmer Fudd.” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Running Out of Gas Edition)“Meanwhile, here in the U.S., a convoy of truckers spent the last two days surfing the Capital Beltway outside D.C. to protest Covid restrictions. Yep, the truckers waited until all the mandates were lifted and gas hit five bucks a gallon.” — JIMMY FALLON“It’s a horrible time to be driving as your protest because now they are praying the cops tow them away just to save on gas.” — TREVOR NOAH“This is just sad. American truckers were trying to block traffic, but D.C. already has so much traffic that nobody really noticed they were protesting.” — TREVOR NOAH“And, I mean, let’s be honest — a protest isn’t much good if it is too subtle for people to know it is a protest. Yeah, it’s like if Rosa Parks bravely decided to sit in the middle of the bus — it just wouldn’t be the same.” — TREVOR NOAHThe Bits Worth WatchingJames Corden was flabbergasted by a moviegoer who released a live bat during a viewing of “The Batman.”What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightLeslie Jones will sit down with Seth Meyers on Tuesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutThe Theranos founder Elizabeth Holmes was recently convicted of four counts of fraud.Photo Illustration by The New York Times; HBO (Elizabeth Holmes)With new limited series like “The Dropout,” “WeCrashed” and “Super Pumped,” television is saturated with ripped-from-the-headlines tales of self-immolating entrepreneurs. More

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      Late Night Recaps Biden’s Annual ‘Status Update’

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      Trevor Noah joked Biden’s speech was “like a birthday card from a 4-year-old: A lot of words didn’t make sense, but you got what it was trying to say.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.America Has Updated Its StatusLate night hosts recapped President Biden’s State of the Union address on Wednesday night, which Trevor Noah called “the one night a year where the president gives the country a status update about how things are going.”“Let’s talk about the State of the Union address, the one night a year Joe Biden stays up past 6 p.m.” — TREVOR NOAH“Biden spoke for 62 minutes. Well, actually he spoke for 10 with 52 minutes of clapping.” — JIMMY FALLON“More than 33 million Americans watched Grampotus speak for more than an hour. He announced he will release 60 million barrels of oil from our national reserve, which is good news for Ted Cruz’s hair.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Last night, President Biden gave the shortest State of the Union address since 2016, clocking in at one hour and two minutes. The shortest — I like this trend. I like it. Let’s get it down — let’s get it down to one TikTok, just save us all a bunch of time.” — JAMES CORDEN“You know, at times this speech was like a birthday card from a 4-year-old: A lot of words didn’t make sense, but you got what it was trying to say.” — TREVOR NOAH“But aside from policing and Covid and Ukraine, Biden also brought up a lot of policies last night that he wanted Congress to pass this year, like letting Medicare negotiate the price of drugs and doubling clean energy production and raising taxes on corporations, and strengthening voting rights — which are all great ideas that I can’t wait for him to bring up again at next year’s State of the Union. Because, I mean, if we’re honest, none of that [expletive] is going to pass through this Congress.” — TREVOR NOAH“According to a new poll, 71 percent of Americans who watched President Biden’s State of the Union address had a positive reaction to the speech. But let’s be honest: Everyone who would have had a negative reaction was watching ‘Yellowstone.’” — SETH MEYERSThe Punchiest Punchlines (Him Who? Edition)“I’m sorry: ‘God protect our troops — Go get him.’ Get who? Go get God?” — TREVOR NOAH, on Joe Biden’s yelling “Go get him!” at the end of his State of the Union speech“Right after, Putin called Trump and was like, [imitating Putin] ‘Is he talking about me?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Go get him who? Does Biden just randomly shout, ‘Go get him’ sometimes? I mean, it would explain why his dog kept attacking people.” — TREVOR NOAH“Who are we supposed to go get? Putin? Pokemon?” — JIMMY KIMMEL“Mike Pence was watching from home and was like, ‘Not again. What did I do this time?’” — JAMES CORDENThe Bits Worth Watching“Tonight Show” guest Zoë Kravitz took Jimmy Fallon in a game of “Can You Feel It?” where they guess objects they can’t see by touch alone.What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightSerena Williams will sit down with Trevor Noah for the first time on Thursday’s “Daily Show.”Also, Check This Out“The Dropout” tracks the rise and fall of Elizabeth Holmes and the start-up Theranos. From left: Elizabeth Meriwether, the creator; Amanda Seyfried, the star; and Rebecca Jarvis, the journalist whose podcast inspired the series.Jingyu Lin for The New York TimesThe women behind “The Dropout” seek to humanize Elizabeth Holmes in their new Hulu series about the disgraced tech entrepreneur. More