Kimmel joked that New York’s special House election results had to be verified “to make sure the winner wasn’t George Santos in disguise.”
Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Anybody But Santos
Tom Suozzi, a Democrat, won a special election on Tuesday to fill the congressional seat previously occupied by George Santos. The victory shrank the Republicans’ thin majority in the House.
Jimmy Kimmel congratulated Suozzi on his win on Wednesday, saying, “You have some very big clown shoes to fill.”
“You guys remember George Santos? Congressman, alleged felon, Sephora platinum member, Nobel laureate, Olympic gold medalist, Clark Kent having allergic reaction and Super Bowl M.V.P.?” — SETH MEYERS
“They actually had to wait to verify the election to make sure the winner wasn’t George Santos in disguise.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“It’s weird when you know nothing about someone but still know they’re an improvement.” — JIMMY FALLON
“That’s right, Tom Suozzi is replacing George Santos, and just from looking at their resumes, the two of them are pretty different. For instance, under education, Suozzi put, ‘B.A. from Boston College.’ Santos put, ‘Ph.D. from Hogwarts.’” — JIMMY FALLON
The Punchiest Punchlines (Valentine’s Day Edition)
“Today was Valentine’s Day, so I know what I’m getting tonight — eight hours of sleep.” — SETH MEYERS
“As I’m sure you’re aware, it is Valentine’s Day. If you weren’t aware, probably why your wife’s been mad all day, not saying anything.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“I want to extend a special welcome to those of you who are making love right now with the TV on. We see you.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“That’s right, today is Valentine’s Day, and if you forgot, don’t worry, there’s a good chance President Biden did, too.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Even Donald Trump posted a romantic message today. He wrote, ‘Biden is not too old, he’s too incompetent.’ As close as he gets to telling somebody he loves them.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“Donald Trump celebrated the day by writing a valentine to his wife Melania, and then having his campaign send a mass email blast with the subject line ‘I love you, Melania!’ [imitating Melania] ‘Unsubscribe.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“Even just graphically, it looks like a ransom letter, which I guess is fitting, given Melania’s current situation.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“And then there’s a little box where you can leave a message for Melania that says, ‘We want 100,000 responses now!’ And of course, a button to make a donation to St. Valen-crime’s legal defense fund. What a lovely and a romantic gesture.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Bits Worth Watching
On Wednesday, Stephen Colbert was joined by his wife, Evie McGee Colbert, to present their new family cookbook, “Does This Taste Funny?”
What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night
The campy pop singer-songwriter Chappell Roan will perform on Thursday’s “Late Show.”
Also, Check This Out
Beyoncé’s new musical turn highlights the exclusion of Black artists in country music.
Source: Television - nytimes.com
