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      Late Night Sends Up ‘Space Cowboy’ Jeff Bezos

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      Stephen Colbert joked that the Amazon billionaire came back from space “extra divorced.”Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘A Mash-Up Between Buzz Lightyear and Woody’Late-night hosts had fun with the Amazon founder Jeff Bezos’s brief trip to space on Tuesday. Stephen Colbert welcomed his audience by saying, “So happy you could all join us tonight for a momentous day in the history of some people having way too much money.”Colbert noted that, despite the amount of coverage devoted to the event, it wasn’t all that newsworthy.“Here’s how I know it’s not important — I hosted the last one of these, OK? For Branson,” Colbert said, referring to the billionaire entrepreneur Richard Branson, who took his own trip to the edge of space last week. “Lot of fun, but talk show hosts don’t anchor historic events — except, of course, when Arsenio Hall interviewed the Berlin Wall.”The hosts couldn’t resist talking about what Bezos was wearing when he returned — a cowboy hat.“I guess space turns you into Kenny Chesney.” — JIMMY FALLON“You know you’re rich when you put that on and everyone who works for you goes, ‘Oh, it looks great, yeah. You’re a man of the people, just going to space.’” — JIMMY FALLON“He looks like a mash-up between Buzz Lightyear and Woody.” — JIMMY FALLON“He got the spacesuit and cowboy hat together by searching for the midlife crisis bundle: ‘Is a soul patch too much?’” — JIMMY FALLON“A cowboy hat? So he went into space and somehow became extra divorced.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Jeff’s Rocket Edition)“Today millions of people all over the world looked up and said, ‘Wow, that thing sure looks like a penis.’” — ANTHONY ANDERSON, guest host of “Jimmy Kimmel Live”“I guess it’s true what they say, billionaires and their rockets end up looking just like each other.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It’s the only rocket that shrinks in the cold.” — JIMMY FALLON“They designed it at the Johnson Space Center.” — TARIQ TROTTER of The Roots, the house band on “The Tonight Show”“It looks like R2-D2 took some Viagra.”— JIMMY FALLON“They don’t keep it in a hangar, they keep it in the top drawer of a bedside table.” — TARIQ TROTTER“Next stop, the ‘O’ zone.” — JIMMY FALLON“It’s not that hard to get to space.” — TARIQ TROTTERThe Bits Worth WatchingJimmy Fallon challenged the Jonas Brothers to “Sing It Like,” with Nick Jonas having to perform Olivia Rodrigo’s “Good 4 U” like he just had his tongue pierced.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightLorde will go day drinking with Seth Meyers on Wednesday’s “Late Night.”Also, Check This Out“I’m writing this not as the prince I was born but as the man I have become,” Prince Harry said in a statement accompanying the book’s announcement.Pool photo by Yui MokPenguin Random House promises Prince Harry’s forthcoming memoir will be “an intimate and heartfelt memoir from one of the most fascinating and influential global figures of our time.” More

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      Late Night Jumps on Olympic Athletes’ Cardboard Beds

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      “That’s nice, you finally reach your Olympic dreams and have to sleep on an Amazon box,” Jimmy Fallon joked on Monday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Bedtime StoriesThere was rampant speculation on Monday that the beds provided to athletes at the Tokyo Olympics were designed to discourage intimate contact that could transmit the coronavirus. Though the social media theory was quickly debunked, the beds are indeed made of cardboard so they can be recycled after the Games.“That’s nice, you finally reach your Olympic dreams and have to sleep on an Amazon box,” Jimmy Fallon joked on Monday.“That’s right, a bed designed to discourage sex, or as it’s also known, an air mattress.” — JIMMY FALLON“Oh yeah, if there’s anything Olympic athletes hate it’s a challenge. Some of those people can do back flips on a three-inch beam. If you really want to stop them from having sex, do what I did in college and put ‘Star Wars’ sheets on them.” — SETH MEYERS“By the way, it turns out the beds were not made of cardboard to discourage sex, but to encourage people to recycle, which is another way to discourage sex.” — SETH MEYERS“I can’t wait for six months from now to read toilet paper labels that read ‘Made from 100 percent recycled Olympic sex bed.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“And athletes, remember: If you’re recycling, you’ve got to break down your Olympic sex bed. Make sure to separate your sex bed from your sex bottles and your sex cans.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Consider the Source Edition)“This weekend President Biden went after big social media platforms like Facebook for not doing enough to stop the spread of Covid misinformation. Yeah, our country has gone from ‘The only thing we have to fear is fear itself’ to ‘Please don’t take medical advice from a meme.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Seriously, you know there’s a problem with Facebook when you can find more honest information on Tinder.” — JIMMY FALLON“Makes you miss the good old days when Facebook’s primary function was helping you find unflattering pictures of your ex’s new boyfriend: ‘Cargo shorts? There’s no way Diane’s happy with him — then why is she smiling?’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Yeah, Biden doesn’t want Facebook to prevent young people from getting vaccinated. Everyone under 30 heard and was like, ‘That is so cute, but literally none of us use Facebook.’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingIn Monday night’s “Closer Look,” Seth Meyers put the spotlight on Donald Trump and Bill O’Reilly’s struggle to sell tickets for their joint speaking tour.What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightJason Sudeikis will be on Tuesday’s “Late Show” to talk about the new season of his Emmy-nominated show, “Ted Lasso.”Also, Check This OutOlivia Scott Welch, left, and Kiana Madeira play lovers and heroes in the “Fear Street” films.Netflix“Fear Street” allows a lesbian romance to blossom among the blood and gore of the new horror trilogy on Netflix. More

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      Jimmy Fallon: Trump Wanted a General With Coup Appeal

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      “You can tell a leader really knows his stuff when he uses the phrase ‘do a coup,’” Fallon said of Trump, who belittled a general for fearing he might try to stay in power.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.‘I’d Coup You’In a new book about Donald Trump’s final year in office, the authors write that Gen. Mark A. Milley, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, feared Trump would attempt to stage a coup to remain in power after losing the election. Trump responded on Thursday: “If I was going to do a coup, one of the last people I would want to do it with is Gen. Mark Milley.”“You can tell a leader really knows his stuff when he uses the phrase, ‘do a coup,’” Jimmy Fallon joked on “The Tonight Show.”“For the next 15 minutes, he named all the people he would do a coup with: ‘I’d coup you. I’d coup you. You’re coup-able.’” — JIMMY FALLON“OK, you’ve clearly put some thought into this thing you’re ‘not into.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“We really need to come up with a better early warning system than tell-all books. ‘We’re in danger — quick, get me a typewriter!’” — SETH MEYERS“In a new book, Milley reveals that following the election night, he thought the ex-president ‘was stoking unrest, possibly in hopes of an excuse to invoke the Insurrection Act and call out the military,’ saying, ‘This is a Reichstag moment.’ No surprise — the last president was very popular with the alt-Reich.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Of course, the Reichstag fire was in 1930s Germany, when an attack on the country’s legislative branch was used as a pretext to solidify fascist control. What the MAGA crowd did this year was totally different — because it was in English.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Olivia Rodrigo Edition)“During a visit to the White House yesterday, pop star Olivia Rodrigo made a surprise appearance at the afternoon press briefing to help promote youth vaccinations, which should have a big impact on the millions of teens who watch the White House press briefings.” — SETH MEYERS“That’s right, pop star Olivia Rodrigo made a surprise appearance at the afternoon press briefings. It was almost as surprising as when Sarah Sanders would appear at one.” — SETH MEYERS“Side note here — it’s nice to see a real celebrity at the White House after the last four years, when the previous president could only manage to dig up the likes of Ted Nugent or Scott Baio.” — SETH MEYERS“Biden’s got huge celebrities helping him out with an unprecedented nationwide campaign to get Americans vaccinated against a deadly disease, and all Trump could muster was 18 holes with Kid Rock and his flag pants, which look like something you buy for six bucks at a truck stop because you tore the [expletive] out of your good pants rock-climbing on peyote.” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth WatchingBarry Jenkins, an Oscar-winning screenwriter and director, talked to Desus and Mero about telling stories of Black trauma onscreen.Also, Check This OutDavid Byrne, center, with Chris Giarmo, left, and Tendayi Kuumba in “American Utopia.”Sara Krulwich/The New York TimesBroadway is finally back, with new Covid safety protocols and productions in previews still working out the kinks. More

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      Late-Night Hosts Rib Rudy Giuliani Over New Election Night Reports

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      “It’s an age-old strategy: After a devastating loss, just say you won,” Stephen Colbert joked of Giuliani on Tuesday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Liquid EncouragementNew reports about former President Donald Trump’s last year in office allege that Rudy Giuliani, his personal lawyer, engaged in some bad behavior on election night.“According to one new book, at the White House election night party, some people thought Rudy Giuliani may have been drinking too much. The other people were Rudy Giuliani,” Stephen Colbert joked on Tuesday’s “Late Show.”“That’s right, Rudy was in rough shape on election night. He was slurring, sweating, confused — then he started drinking.” — JIMMY FALLON“Reportedly, drunk Rudy asked, ‘What’s happening in Michigan?’ and they said it was too early to tell. ‘Just say we won,’ Giuliani told them, saying the same thing in Pennsylvania: ‘Just say we won Pennsylvania!’ God, Rudy must have been an annoying kid. You’re playing tag, you get him on the shoulder, but instead of just admitting it, he says ‘Nuh uh!’ at a press conference next to a dildo store.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Yeah, and if that didn’t work, Rudy’s other plan was for Trump to legally change his name to Joe Biden.” — JIMMY FALLON“Campaign officials shot the idea down, but after Fox News called Arizona for Biden on election night, Giuliani advised the former president, ‘Just go declare victory right now. You’ve got to go declare victory now.’ It’s an age-old strategy: After a devastating loss, just say you won.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Punchiest Punchlines (Vaccination Frustration Edition)“The Biden administration has reportedly run out of ideas to encourage more people to get the coronavirus vaccine. Luckily, the virus is coming up with new ideas all the time.” — SETH MEYERS“I’m vaccinated. It’s Johnson & Johnson, though. Aw, my bad. Johnson & Johnson — I thought it was like a small Black business. I don’t know no white folks named Johnson.” — ARSENIO HALL, guest host of “Jimmy Kimmel Live”“I saw that tomorrow, Olivia Rodrigo is going to the White House. She’s going to team up with President Biden and Dr. Fauci to make videos about getting vaccinated. When his staff suggested bringing in popular musical artists, Biden was like, ‘Great idea. How about Glenn Miller or the Andrews Sisters?’” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingAmy Poehler joined Seth Meyers on “Late Night” for a new edition of “Really!?!” devoted to billionaires in space.What We’re Excited About on Wednesday NightThe comedian Phoebe Robinson is the guest host on Wednesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”Also, Check This OutMj Rodriguez, center, received an Emmy nomination for best lead actress in a drama for her work on the FX show “Pose.”Eric Liebowitz/FXThis year’s Emmy nominations include several firsts, including “Pose” star Mj Rodriguez as the first trans performer to be nominated in a leading acting category. More

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      Late Night Has Plenty of Virgin Jokes

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      Richard Branson’s spaceflight with his company Virgin Galactic was the talk of late night on Monday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Taking Up SpaceLate-night hosts couldn’t resist poking fun at Richard Branson’s trek into space over the weekend with his company Virgin Galactic, the first in a series of planned trips by billionaire entrepreneurs.“You know these are crazy times when it’s safer flying to space than going on a Carnival Cruise, don’t you think?” Jimmy Fallon joked in his monologue on Monday.“That’s right, Virgin Galactic made history by launching the first goatee into space.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yeah, Branson went with two pilots and three of his employees. So if you think it’s awkward riding an elevator with your boss, try going to space.” — JIMMY FALLON“Actually, I got a little choked up watching Branson’s flight. It always warms my heart to see billionaires achieve their dreams.” — JIMMY FALLON“I was happy for him, though. Normally when a billionaire flies away faster than the speed of sound, it’s because they just got linked to Jeffrey Epstein.” — JIMMY FALLON“That’s right, Branson beat Jeff Bezos to space. That’s why Branson got home and found a little flaming Amazon package on his front porch.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Punchiest Punchlines (Virgin Jokes Edition)“The Virgin flight took about an hour, which is the first time any virgin has ever done anything in an hour.” — ARSENIO HALL, guest host on “Jimmy Kimmel Live”“Branson’s trip to space only lasted about four minutes, which is honestly pretty good for a virgin.” — JIMMY FALLON“Now, technically — technically — Branson’s flight reached the edge of space, and the Virgin Galactic crew experienced only four minutes of weightlessness. He barely went in and lasted only a few minutes? Well, that is a virgin.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“That’s right, the flight went more than 50 miles high to the edge of space. Southwest heard and was like, ‘Big deal. We did that last week when one of our pilots fell asleep.’” — JIMMY FALLON“Eighty kilometers? That’s not even worth mentioning at a party.” — SETH MEYERS“Just ’cause you touched net doesn’t mean you can say you dunked. Branson’s like one of those guys who say, ‘Yeah, I’ve been to Texas’ and then you find out he changed planes once at Dallas-Fort Worth.” — SETH MEYERS“Call me when you’ve reached the moon, Richard. Surprised he didn’t call me yesterday — he’s probably got cell service up there.” — SETH MEYERSThe Bits Worth WatchingSeth Meyers’s “Closer Look” delved into some of the more notable moments from the Conservative Political Action Conference over the weekend.What We’re Excited About on Tuesday NightRichard Branson, just back from space, will check in with Stephen Colbert on Tuesday’s “Late Show.”Also, Check This OutFrom left, Murray Bartlett, Jolene Purdy, Natasha Rothwell, Christie Volkmer and Lukas Gage in “The White Lotus.” The series focuses on the interactions between guests and staff members at a luxury resort.Mario Perez/HBOHBO’s new series “The White Lotus” is a perfectly timed satire of privilege from Mike White, the writer behind the short-lived but beloved show “Enlightened.” More

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      Conan O’Brien Bids Farewell to Late Night

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      After 28 years on late-night television and 11 years on TBS, O’Brien is moving on to HBO Max.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.To Be ContinuedAfter 28 years on late night and 11 years on TBS, Conan O’Brien bade farewell on Thursday night, thanking the network, producers, writers, family and fans.“I’ve devoted all of my adult life — all of it — to pursuing this strange phantom intersection between smart and stupid. And there’s a lot of people who believe the two cannot coexist, but god, I will tell you, it is something that I believe religiously. I think when smart and stupid come together, it’s very difficult, but if you can make it happen, I think it’s the most beautiful thing in the world,” O’Brien said.He ended on an optimistic note ahead of his move to HBO Max.“So my advice to people watching out there right now — it’s not easy to do. It’s not easy to do. It’s not easy to do, but try — try and do what you love with people you love. And if you can manage that, it’s the definition of heaven on earth. I swear to God, it really is,” O’Brien said.Homer Simpson made a special appearance to conduct the exit interview, harking back to O’Brien’s first job, writing for “The Simpsons.”On his show, Jimmy Kimmel congratulated O’Brien on his run, joking, “Anyway, here’s to Conan and Andy Richter, and congratulations to Jay Leno on his new time slot at TBS.”The Punchiest Punchlines (America’s Mayor Edition)“Speaking of New York, the state just suspended Rudy Giuliani from practicing law because of his repeated false and misleading statements about the election. Even Rudy was like, ‘What the hell took you so long?’” — JIMMY FALLON“Former Trump lawyer Rudy Giuliani has been banned from practicing law in the state of New York. ‘I object,’ said people at his wedding.” — SETH MEYERS“You know you’ve crossed the line when other lawyers are, like, ‘This guy lies way too much.’” — JIMMY FALLON“I mean, I’m just shocked to find out Rudy had a law license. I bet Rudy is, too: [imitating Giuliani] ‘I thought that was my Quiznos card — I’m one hole punch away from a free sub!’” — SETH MEYERS“This is a dramatic fall from grace. In the city he was famously the mayor of, Rudy Giuliani can no longer practice law. And if the last year has proven anything, it’s that when it comes to law, Rudy needs a lot of practice.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“How is he gonna eat? And, more likely, drink? Well, if he needs cash, he could always sell the fracking rights to his skull.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“It’s a mixed bag for Rudy. The bad news, he can’t practice law in New York; the good news, he can’t defend himself at his next trial.” — JIMMY FALLONThe Bits Worth WatchingThe “Black-ish” and “Grown-ish” star Yara Shahidi sat down with Desus and Mero to talk about growing up in front of the camera and encountering fans who don’t know her real name.Also, Check This OutElla Fitzgerald performing on “The Ed Sullivan Show” in 1965. Her performance with Duke Ellington is one of hundreds now available on the show’s official YouTube channel.CBS, via YouTube“The Ed Sullivan Show” went off the air 50 years ago, but some of its best episodes can be found on YouTube. More

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      Late Night Reams Republicans for Blocking the For the People Act

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      “The Republicans instead supported the ‘For Some of the People — We Can’t Say It Out Loud, but You Know Which Ones We Mean — Act,’” Stephen Colbert said of the voting rights bill.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.Who’s the Fairest of Them AllRepublicans blocked a far-reaching voting rights bill, known as the For the People Act, in the Senate on Tuesday.“The Republicans instead supported the ‘For Some of the People — We Can’t Say It Out Loud, but You Know Which Ones We Mean — Act,’” Stephen Colbert said on Wednesday night.“The Senate voted yesterday to block the For the People voting rights bill, but not until they got their voting paperwork in order. Let’s see, I got my license, passport, tax returns, high school yearbook. OK, I think I’m ready for my riddle.” — SETH MEYERS“Senate Republicans haven’t been this happy since Kenny G started touring again.” — JIMMY FALLON“Yep, Democrats wanted things like automatic voter registration and Election Day to be a national holiday, while Republicans wanted every polling place to be at a yacht club.” — JIMMY FALLON“Republican Senator Mike Lee said in an interview yesterday with Fox News host Sean Hannity that the For the People voting rights act was, quote, ‘written in hell by the devil himself,’ which is also what it says on the poster for ‘F9.’” — SETH MEYERS“Yes, the Senate’s founding purpose: to do nothing. It’s right there in Article I: ‘All legislative powers herein granted shall be vested in a Congress of the United States, which shall consist of a Senate, where one wizened, ancient turtle man, with no regard for anything but the self-preservation of his own power, shall, with his pockets stuffed with greasy bags full of money, strangle the hope of all who dare to dream of true democracy, and recognize April as National Jazz Month.’”— STEPHEN COLBERT, on Senator Mitch McConnell’s saying the Senate was fulfilling its “founding purpose”The Punchiest Punchlines (Dad, You’re Embarrassing Me Edition)“Speaking of the former president, his daughter and son-in-law don’t want to, because reports say that Ivanka and Jared Kushner have distanced themselves from the former president and his constant complaints. That complaint? [imitating Trump] ‘Why does he get to date my daughter? Doesn’t seem fair. We’re both family.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Trump has become so distant from Ivanka that he started to call her ‘Eric.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“When he heard that one of his kids wanted distance, Trump was like, ‘Please be Eric, please be Eric!’” — JIMMY FALLON“Apparently the feeling is somewhat mutual, because insiders say there is jealousy from the former president about Kushner’s ‘seven-figure book deal.’ Early reports are that Jared’s book is going to be a lot like Jared: glossy and no spine.” — STEPHEN COLBERTThe Bits Worth WatchingOn Wednesday’s “Late Show,” the actress Christine Baranski joined Colbert in singing “Side by Side by Side” from Stephen Sondheim’s “Company.”What We’re Excited About on Thursday NightJack Black will be the final guest on Conan O’Brien’s TBS talk show.Also, Check This OutEd McMahon seemed to define the job when he worked with Johnny Carson on “The Tonight Show.”NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal, via Getty ImagesFrom Ed McMahon to Andy Richter, late-night shows have a long history of sidekicks. More

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      Jimmy Kimmel: Trump Can’t Take a Joke

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      The former president denied reports that he tried to use his office to keep late-night shows from poking fun at him. “Not only that, he wanted Guillermo to pay for the wall,” Kimmel said on Tuesday.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now. More